Whoa, Dad!

Dad's Favorite UFO sighting

Fri, 30 Jan 2026 11:01:12 -0800

My dad walks me through the Navy’s “Tic Tac” UFO sighting — the encounter that made him take UFOs seriously.

He explains what pilots reported seeing, why this incident stands out, and why he thinks it matters. I try to follow his logic and keep him on track as the conversation does what it usually does.

This episode isn’t about proving anything — it’s about how my dad understands the story.

The Topic's First Episode (Full Ep)

Fri, 23 Jan 2026 09:35:01 -0800

We are finally back together with a whole new season covering my Dad's new obsession, UFOs and the paranormal! He is here to convince me that aliens are real in hopes that it will cure my fear of death. Not sure how this will actually help but I'm up for the ride. This episode we discuss why we are doing this, the most prodomenment people bringing this topic to light and what my Dad thinks UFOs really are.

Each week on 'The Topic' we will be covering a new UFO topic while I try to desperately get my Dad to stay on 'Topic'.

If you want to witness this chaos subscribe to us on youtube.com/nikkibon

AL-ANON IS KEY w/ Harper-Rose Drummond

Sat, 29 Jul 2023 10:36:44 -0700

When you have a fun cool dad that parties and does drugs with you at concerts and a mom who turns into a cruel Disney witch when she drinks, what you gonna do? GO TO AL-ANON! That's what has helped today's guest, Harper, who just recently has healed from the chaos of parents with substance abuse.

INVINCIBLE DAD w/ Mav Viola

Fri, 07 Jul 2023 11:45:31 -0700

The amount of times Mav's dad has failed at attempted suicide is dramatically humerus at this point. He's invincible. You gotta laugh at the dark stuff to get by and Mav did just that to stay sane. In order to cope with her parents Mav had to live by the mantra and persona of being an "everything's fine" person. And that has stabbed her in the back.

HONESTY’S THE WORST POLICY w/ Noah Findling

Fri, 23 Jun 2023 14:22:58 -0700

Even though Noah has good parents, he still wound up in jail because of following his Dad's cardinal rule "honesty is the best policy" and to never lie. The big lesson here is: 1) there's no such thing as perfect parents. 2) don't EVER tell the cops the truth when it comes to drugs. And 3) sometimes too much support can make your kid ill prepared for the reality of this cruel and manipulative world.

GRANDMA KNOWS BEST W/ AUSTIN TRAIN

Fri, 26 May 2023 13:13:42 -0700

This one's a doozy. Comedian Austin Train was raised by his grandma who is still with us today. Thank god. Austin joins me to talk about his complicated relationship with his mom who has always put herself first and his distant dad who's trying to make it right.

PARENTAL JAILBIRDS W/ Melanie Mary

Fri, 05 May 2023 14:07:19 -0700

Melanie Mary's mom went to jail the same time her dad was getting out. And now she is confronting her abandonment issues by taking her life into her own hands and putting herself first for once. Looking after parents when they haven't looked after you your whole life is something many abandoned children struggle with and face resentment. I'm guilty of it. But in Melanie's case, she has been taking care of her mom with stage four cancer, only to learn that her mom will never be the mom she wants her to bye. This is why we're comics.

DAD WHO CRIED WOLF w/ LARA

Fri, 07 Apr 2023 12:39:09 -0700

This one is a wild one. Lara's dad plays dead just so she will come and visit him and tend to his needs. Most kids grow up playing pretend with their parents but in Lara's case it wasn't to entertain her childlike imagination, but to calm her dad down from his hallucinations. From pretending to pick glass out of his arm to calling the fake FBI, Lara has always been catering to her dads opioid addiction and hypochondriac paranoia. Meanwhile, dealing with a mom that doesn't exude the most loving energy.

PRESSURES OF BEING A PERFECT DAUGHTER w/ Kelly Ryan

Thu, 16 Mar 2023 12:07:10 -0700

Kelly was my ideal guest because she lets it all out with tears and yelling. YES! A true comedian and great daughter. Even though she has a great relationship with her parents she still got a little screwed up. Trying to maintain the peace, being mindful of her parents feelings and feeling guilty for her flaws, Kelly works hard at being a perfect daughter. But it will never be enough. As she explains, aka erupts, in this episode. Even when you come from a solid family it can take a lot to maintain that happiness and we end up parenting our parents.

Follow Kelly https://www.instagram.com/thisiskellyryan/?hl=en

THE MOTHER LOAD w/ Zach Stein

Thu, 23 Feb 2023 11:31:10 -0800

Physically abused by his mom, sent to disciplinary boarding schools and outdoor wilderness programs for troubled kids, Zach has been through all the discipline. Being the youngest, Zach endured a lot more anger from his mom and was still able to forgive her. Talk about working on yourself and coming out on top!

MOTHER’S BETRAYAL: Part 2 w/ ROB

Sat, 21 Jan 2023 10:38:16 -0800

The women who took everything, his moms. You thought Rob's dad was bad? Wait until you hear what his stepmom AND birth mom did once his dad was gone. Just when Rob was doing well in school and starting to land on his feat, both of the women in his life abandon, betray and steal from him. This is ep is a two parter because there are truly two key chapters in Rob's life where his parental figures f***d him over. Through the help of Rob's teachers and his own persistence, he overcame his family hurdles and turned out pretty damn good.

DON’T WAKE DADDY w/ ROB SMALLWOOD (Part 1)

Thu, 12 Jan 2023 00:47:00 -0800

"Do you want the long or short version of how I almost killed my father" Comedian Rob Smallwood was pushed to the limit by his abusive father. And when it was time to defend his family he almost took his dads life. Just when he thought he was in the clear and on his way to live a normal life, his mom and stepmom did him dirty. There are two significant chapters in his life that his parents f***'d him over so this ep is a two parter. This week is about how Rob's dad. Next week, we cover how his mom and stepmom both stole his college opportunities and money.

FORGIVE AND FORGET w/ ERIKA BRYANT

Sat, 17 Dec 2022 11:32:45 -0800

Erika's mom left her at the age of 6 to go find herself. And despite everything, Erika has been able to forgive and reestablish a close relationship with her mom later in life. She shares how she discovered and got over her codependency, love bombs and unhealthy relationships. This Author, Executive Producer and Show Runner (AKA POWERHOUSE) has overcome her abandonment issues in a way I've never considered before.

I highly recommend her book "Doing It Scared"

https://www.amazon.com/stores/erika-bryant/author/B08W2DLFYR?ref=ap_rdr&store_ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true

PARANOID PARENTS w/ BEN HERWITZ

Thu, 01 Dec 2022 16:34:21 -0800

Ben's smothering and paranoid parents pushed him to rebel in the most extreme way. Prostitutes, stealing and gambling was how he coped with pretending to be perfect for so long. Ben had to set boundaries in order to get back on track. But there's a family secret that would probably help solve a lot of the issues. His daddy's disowned and won't say why. Which clearly comes out in his anger issues.

Follow Ben www.instagram.com/benherwitzcomedian

And check out his new podcast Ben The Menace

WHEN YOUR DAD’S CHEATING w/ JULIA AUSTIN

Fri, 04 Nov 2022 15:39:03 -0700

Comedian Julia Austin became a teenage detective when she caught her dad having a provocative phone call with someone other than her mom. That's when she was determined to catch him in the act.

Julia talks about the lengths she went to, to get encourage her parents to get a divorce and the impact her Dad's affair had on her physical health. Now that her dad is with the "other woman", Julia and her siblings are a second thought compared to the pretty pretty princess that broke up her family. But that didn't stop Julia from having such a healthy and grounded outlook on the situation. Julia should write a self help book about how to look past your parents flaws. This girl is smart as F***.

WHOA, MOMMY! W/ CLAIRE CAVALHEIRO

Fri, 14 Oct 2022 10:15:56 -0700

It's time to shed some light on Mommy issues and there is no better person to broach this subject than producer, writer, actor, Claire Cavalheiro. Claire's mom is a flow blown narcissist and after years of emotional abuse Claire had no other choice than to cut her out. But goddamn are some of these stories SO funny!

SHARON FREDRICKSON: MAKE DADDY PROUD

Thu, 15 Sep 2022 12:00:00 -0700

Comedic personality Sharon Fredrickson spent the majority of her life trying to make Daddy proud and get his approval. So much so that she followed a career path and achieved material success that made her miserable in hopes of getting his approval. Although her dad likes to knock her down (emotionally not physically, phew), Sharon is still one of the most authentic and hilarious I-don't-give-a-f*** people I've known. Listen, she DID almost blow it and ruin her relationship but she bounced back. Sharon can teach ya thing or two about sticking up for yourself. Catch Sharon on @REACT @People Vs Food Listen to more eps of WHOA,DAD! anywhere you get your podcasts. Watch this on youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VxIT99mM8g

Follow Sharon on:

TikTok: @sfredrickson1

Instagram: @sfredrickson https://www.instagram.com/sfredrickson/?hl=en

Follow me on:

TikTok: Nikkibon

Instagram: Nikkibon

You actually wanna venmo us? WHOA, THANKS!

Sharon's Venmo: @sfredrickson

My Venmo teehee: @nikki-bon

If you like what you see and wanna donate and get extra content sign up for https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon

BOBBY LEE PT 2: DADDY TALK

Wed, 10 Aug 2022 15:07:30 -0700

Part 1 we talked mostly industry. In Bobby Lee PT 2 we get down and dirty with what I've been waiting for, his daddy issues.

If you're a new listener I highly recommend, after this, starting at ep 1.

Watch full interview on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rV1Pg8uYM3E

BOBBY LEE’S HERE

Thu, 04 Aug 2022 15:21:44 -0700

The great Bobby Lee's here subbing in for Bobby the dad. You may know him from Mad TV, his stand-up specials, his podcasts or every show out right now. But I know him for his daddy issues. K that's not what stands out about him. But he wouldn't be where he is today if it wasn't for the abusive relationship he had with his dad. Bobby's outlook on life childhood trauma is pretty inspiring. Damn, there's just something so comforting about saying the name 'Bobby' on the pod again.

IT’S MY BOYFRIEND

Thu, 14 Jul 2022 14:50:30 -0700

This week it's my boyfriend who is joining us. He's here to give some insight and perspective on what he has witnessed throughout this whole process. He didn't wanna do it but I made him. Poor guy. Not only has he had to deal with my daddy issues, but now he's having to replace him on the podcast. I figured, may as well get Matt to fill the void as per usual.

DADDY ISSUES COMICS: RYAN CLARK PT 2

Fri, 24 Jun 2022 16:07:01 -0700

Ryan and I realize that we fall under the category of Daddy Issues comics. Comics who are scared to ask for things because we are so used to disappointment that what's the point? This isn't a woe is me story, just a behavioral observation. In this ep, Ryan goes deep about his dad not defending his sister when she was sexually assaulted, what it's like having a daughter of his own and his deep dark fantasies about killing his dad. Don't worry he's not gonna do it. It's just what happens when you want validation so badly...you would kill for it.

RYAN’S WALKING ON EGGSHELLS

Thu, 26 May 2022 14:23:38 -0700

Comedian Ryan Clark has just recently let his dad back into his life after having to take a step back to protect his daughter. With a dad who has anger issues and temperamental mood swings, Ryan's been walking on eggshells his whole life. And Ryan's here to share how he has come to terms with the fact that "closure is a luxury".

MARGAUX vs THE GIRLFRIEND

Fri, 06 May 2022 15:07:02 -0700

Comedian, Margaux Hamilton, has always had a dad that shows up to every game and swim meet. But when it comes to putting her first, its Margaux vs the girlfriend. And the girlfriend always wins. Margaux has gone through many stepmoms and every time she has struggled with not being a priority in her dads life. He's there physically but not mentally. Just recently Margaux had to step up to the plate when her dad had a heart attack and was in a coma. While battling if to pull the plug she also had to take on her dads girlfriend who wasn't making things any easier. Since then, Margaux has had to to step back from her relationship with her dad in order to stop dating guys like her dad.

BOBBY’S BACK

Thu, 21 Apr 2022 15:16:40 -0700

It's been about two months since we have spoken and now Bobby's back! Just in time for my birthday episode. I will give a rundown of what happened when we finally spoke after our fight and what happened when we made up but before my dad logs on to record. I think it's too soon and he isn't ready to talk about it on the podcast. But we will get there! So instead, we try to pick up where we left off and test my dad to see what he would do if he was around for my birthday when I was a kid. His party ideas are surprisingly better than what my mom did. It's all fun and games until he gets into my birth story. Consider yourself warned.

EMILY AND HER DAD’S SECRET (Part 2)

Thu, 31 Mar 2022 14:29:45 -0700

We continue the conversation with Emily and her dad's secret. Emily had to cut him off when she realized that her toxic relationships with men were a result of her relationship with her dad. Duh. That's normally the way. It's what brought her to this point in time, that is compelling. I dunno which part of this episode is more interesting, that she was in a Christian cult or here dads reaction to the final conversation.

EMILY’S DAD HAS A SECRET

Thu, 24 Mar 2022 12:49:35 -0700

Growing up in a heavy Christian household, Emily never expected to watch her dad, a Pastor, get arrested when she was 13. Emily's dad has a secret and she has finally decided to cut off all communication in order to have a healthier relationship with men and herself. Wanna know what he did? You'll have to listen to find out. Emily's story and who she has grown to be today is mind blowing. Did I mention she almost joined a Christian Cult?

WOULD YOU RATHER w/ MATT LOCKWOOD

Thu, 10 Mar 2022 09:21:00 -0800

While I wait to talk to my dad, the show must go on. And now I'm talking to people with daddy issues of all different kinds. Hilarious comic and good pal Matt Lockwood talks about the effects of growing up with a dad who was physically there but not emotionally. He has lived through one of my biggest fears, stepparents breaking up your family and being forgotten about. Would you rather a parent who isn't there physically or emotionally? Either way, we both have the same insecurities.

THIS ONE HURTS

Thu, 24 Feb 2022 16:26:34 -0800

My dad and I aren't speaking right now. So this one hurts. It's been three weeks since we last spoke and since I don't know when the next time will be, I am doing this episode alone to explain what happened and where we are at. We got into a little argument, which I will explain on this episode, and now I am waiting for him to call me when he's ready to talk. Until then, I figured it's only fair, to share what happened since it's a part of our journey. But I sure do hate being this vulnerable. I'm not sure if this is a break or what will happen next but please stick with us as we figure out the ups and downs of building a relationship.

You can continue to watch videos on our instagram @whoadadpodcast

And I will be posting more videos and longer clips on my youtube channel youtube.com/nikkibon

And doing a video journal on patreon.com/nikkibon

HEY DAD? CALL ME BACK!

Sun, 30 Jan 2022 12:05:12 -0800

There's been a lot of things to confront my dad about lately. Like why doesn't he call me back? His aloof texts. If he's ever going to book a flight to visit me?! And his answers aren't exactly what I was looking for.

RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

Thu, 13 Jan 2022 17:17:03 -0800

My boyfriend and I got into a fight over the holidays so I bring the issue to my dad to see if he has any fatherly input. Believe it or not, he really puts things into perspective and gives some sound advice. While highlighting my faults. Ouch.

OUR HOLIDAY TRADITION -

Thu, 23 Dec 2021 12:02:11 -0800

For the second year in a row my dad reads the 'The Night Before Christmas' which officially makes this our holiday tradition. However, the holiday spirit is almost lost when he tells me he didn't get me a Christmas present and I experience an embarrassing bout of food poisoning. Happy holidays!

MY HAIR‘S FALLING OUT

Fri, 26 Nov 2021 08:00:00 -0800

My dad has gone back to his old ways of texting me things that trigger my abandonment issues and it's time to bring it up. I hate this part. My hair is falling out because I had the delta variant and my dad doesn't make me feel better when he tells me he can see my bald spots. After this episode it feels the only progress we have made is apparently he has cut back on Nicorette now that he is breathing through his nose? We will see about that.

MONAREY Part 2

Sat, 13 Nov 2021 12:55:37 -0800

In the second half of our chat with comedian Monarey Martinez we discuss energetic nets that haunt Los Angeles, a horrifying sky diving experience, acid trips and what lead Monarey to be a comedian. Of course, Bobby has his moments and tries to get us to repeat ourselves three times and gets off track to talk about his latest discovery of what the government is hiding. But I'm getting better at editing him in the moment. Maybe we are getting somewhere? Probably not.

Follow Monarey on instagram https://www.instagram.com/monareym/?hl=en

Monarey's Podcast The Shamic https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-shamic/id1553689544

MONAREY MARTINEZ

Fri, 29 Oct 2021 12:13:14 -0700

Up and coming comedian, Monarey Martinez (my 'witch friend' I often talk about) has done a lot of self healing to overcome her childhood trauma. And makes my dad look like a saint when she shares her stories of growing up with drug addict parents.

Taking the Greyhound from Buffalo to LA with only $200 to her name, Monarey has had quite the journey. But my dads favourite thing to talk about is her spiritual side and her take on the universe, extraterrestrial beings, star seeds, DNA downloads and what we need to know about where the earth is heading.

Follow Monarey on Instagram @monareym

Check out her podcast The Shamic on all places you can get podcasts.

HURRICANE IDA

Thu, 14 Oct 2021 14:00:51 -0700

My dad was in New Orleans when Hurricane Ida hit. I don't know what was worse, the storm or the hit he took when he flipped over his electronic scooter the day before the hurricane. Bobby tells the tales of what it was like during and after the storm like his heroic moment saving the roof of the shed, making due without electricity and his unique inventions that came to him while in isolation. Hint: It's not NOT a porn flashlight. OH! Not to mention his new carnivore diet that was inspired by his broken ribs.

MY MENTAL BREAKDOWN

Fri, 01 Oct 2021 08:00:00 -0700

This is the hardest episode I've ever had to put out there. And I may still delete it. Within 10 minutes of recording my dad doesn't feel well and asks if we can record after he takes a nap. His aloof texts messages leave me hanging and send me on a downward spiral wondering if he is ever going to come back to record. In a moment of panic and frustration, I recorded my mental breakdown and share my fears and ALLL my emotions while I sat waiting in anticipation. This is the realest it gets. Does he come back and record? I'll let you find out.

SUBSTITUTE DAD: Anthony Dayo

Fri, 10 Sep 2021 11:59:20 -0700

My dad is in New Orleans and due to the hurricane and doesn't have any power which means, no podcasting. We weren't sure how long that was going to last so instead of waiting,I brought in a substitute dad, Anthony Dayo, to play the dad role on this episode. I ask Dayo his advice on whether I am putting too much pressure on my dad to podcast in times like this and how to know if I'm being a brat. Dayo discusses what it was like to have his daughter in LA for the longest she's ever stayed with him and his experiences of home schooling and co-parenting. Most importantly, how his dad came back after 20 years of stepping out to go do crack.

Dm Whoa Dad Podcast on instagram to convince my dad to come back and record with me. PLEASE!

DICEY Part 2: STRANGE ENCOUNTERS

Fri, 27 Aug 2021 12:17:23 -0700

Dicey talks about her UFO encounter. That's all that really matters. And Bobby becomes a cult leader as he tries to get her on board with all of his conspiracy videos. We discuss how Dicey's life shifted when she started seeing her healer Liz and the crazy turn of events once she started down her spiritual path.

If you are interested in contacting Liz dm @whoadadpodcast or message us on patreon.

COMEDIAN DICEY Part 1

Thu, 12 Aug 2021 11:57:03 -0700

Dicey, one of the best up and coming comedians, joins us on this weeks episode. Thank god she is chill as f*** because Bobby decided to take another hit of "tobacco", before we recorded again. Dicey is a perfect playdate for Bobby(yes I still feel like the parent) because her journey and life experiences are something my dad preaches about on almost every episode. From dealing with racism in Texas to the magic that guided her to where she is today, Dicey grabs my dads full attention. Which is quite hard these days.

Follow us on patreon.com/nikkibon to catch our game show audition. Where Bobby does pretty much the whole interview with his shirt unbuttoned and we discover that maybe we're just real stupid.

IS HE EVEN PAYING ATTENTION?

Fri, 23 Jul 2021 12:09:44 -0700

My dad finally gets to interview me about my 'journey'. I've been putting this off because I HATE talking about myself. However, I thought it was only fair to let him guide this episode. Turns out, he does't really. His lacklustre questions and responses make me believe that he only wanted to interview me so he can zone out and let me do all the talking. Is he even paying attention to anything I'm saying? Don't think so.

BUT! I don't realize it until I'm done blabbing about moving to New York, experiencing Hurricane Sandy my first month there, brutal roommates, moving to LA only to have my school (Atlantic) cancel the program, brutal roommates again, and trying to navigate my way through this phoney baloney town.

HIGH DAD

Fri, 09 Jul 2021 12:55:34 -0700

Now that weed is legal, my dad is becoming more open about his recreational usage. So much so that he hits the vape before we record. So this episode comes with a warning.

Since we didn't get to the father daughter trivia last week we give it another shot to try and see who knows more about the other person. It's a struggle to try and keep him on track so I had to bring out the big girl tactics and share an embarrassing story I KNEW would grab his attention. A story I've had in my back pocket incase of emergencies like this. A topic he can't resist. The tale of when I shit myself during quarantine.

BOBBY'S FIRST FATHER'S DAY

Fri, 25 Jun 2021 11:56:28 -0700

My dad takes full advantage of father's day and treats himself to a little relaxing toke before he records this ep. Don't say I didn't warn ya. I didn't get my dad anything for father's day but his friends daughter did and my jealous only child side comes out. My gets riled up talking about the latest trends in fashion and decor and goes off about all the things he hates. Which ends up being a lot of things. Don't even get him started on Blimey Bleekers (Peaky Blinders).

PREPPING FOR THE ALIEN INVASION

Thu, 10 Jun 2021 13:53:41 -0700

If there's one thing my dad believes in, it's aliens. And he has a whole theory about what he thinks is going to happen when they arrive. I put my dads "fatherly" ways to the test and get him to experience what it would be like to have to prepare 12 year old me for a UFO invasion.

While my Bobby fights to get off the phone, I discover how fearless my dad is when he describes his stories from when he used to fly planes. Believe it or not, he may not be able to be a proper, but he CAN FLY PLANES? I work hard to not let him off the hook and tell his terrifying tales of piloting.

ADVICE ON HOW TO DEAL WITH MEAN PEOPLE

Fri, 28 May 2021 14:27:57 -0700

I've always wondered what it would be like to have a dad comfort me when someone hurt my feelings. Lucky for me I've encountered a bunch of mean and sh***y people recently and my dad gives me advice about what to do about it. Not what I had expected a dad to say, but hey, I'll give it a shot. Turns out me and my dad have the same theory about friends who betray or hurt us.

My dad and I talk out a little fight we had last week. He thinks I'm super sensitive but I think I just am sick of having to be a punching bag for someone else bad day.

DAD, IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!

Thu, 13 May 2021 11:55:52 -0700

It's my birthday and this is the first time I kind of spend it with my dad. I mean we still aren't together but I get him to have a virtual birthday party with me. I make my dad do all the things he missed out on when I was a kid like: creating loot bags, watching me open his present, dealing with thug kids and the hardest part, making the focus all about me instead of him. My dad realizes how good of a job my mom did at my birthdays and shares his fond memories of how she handled his DUI.

My dad regrets the present he got me when I discover it is the perfect tool to prevent him from putting gum in his mouth.

Not vulnerable enough for you? Want to support us on this journey? Sign up to Patreon to have access to our email correspondences that did a number on our relationship, videos, unedited eps and classic documented Bobby moments.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon

We want to hear from you! Let us know your advice and questions whoadadpodcast@gmail.com

ERIC JOHNSON pt 2

Thu, 29 Apr 2021 10:47:59 -0700

Being a successful actor comes with its struggles, especially when you have a family. We get into the challenges Eric has faced trying to stay present in his kids life while spending months away filming and how the family dynamic shifts.

Bobby tries to analyze Eric's childhood and how that has influenced him as an actor. And of course, continues to probe Eric about the film industry and his time working on The Knick.

Dad Of The Month: ERIC JOHNSON

Thu, 15 Apr 2021 10:23:35 -0700

You might know him from: The Knick, Fifty Shades Darker, Vikings or Smallville but I know him as a dad who can do it all. Eric seems to have mastered juggling a successful acting career and fatherhood. This a two parter, because that's how it goes down these days. In this episode Eric, once a small town boy from Edmonton, answers all of Bobby's inquires about his journey, what goes on behind the scenes of filming and how he overcomes his anxieties of working with some of the greats like Steven Soderbergh and Clive Owen.

IS THERE A GOD? PT 2 w/ GAE

Thu, 01 Apr 2021 12:45:25 -0700

We continue our conversation with energy healer Gae Thornton. When I step away to take a phone call, Bobby confides in Gae about his hesitations about doing the podcasts. He gears up to ask Gae the question he's been debating for years...is the moon hallow? And secondly, is there a god?

Gae describes why we choose the parents we do before we set foot on this earth and how to create a more solid path.

Whether you are in the LA area or overseas, I highly recommend Gae and her classes, healings and events. Working with Gae in person is very powerful but remotely has been just as impactful.

You can find Gae here.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gigiitsme/

https://www.instagram.com/thedopesouljourney/

thedopesouljourney.com

thedopesouljourney@gmail.com

ENERGY THERAPIST: GAE THORNTON

Fri, 19 Mar 2021 10:19:06 -0700

Gae, SAVE US! Energy therapist, Gae Thornton, heals and coaches Bobby through the many questions that have been "spinning around in this little 8 pound ball" on his neck. What was supposed to be a spiritual healing to help resolve our father-daughter issues, turns into Bobby’s personal Q&A about the mysteries of life. Gae answers my dads questions about: what is consciousness, 5th dimensions, aliens, energy healing, the effect our ancestors have on us, our guides and much more. Bobby was more excited about this interview with Gae than he was about getting his vaccine.

I have been going to Gae for over five years and thanks to her I’m not as screwed up as I should be. Gae’s spiritual healings have helped me resolve many of my insecurities caused by my abandonment issues and other factors. My dad has gone to her as well which is why I thought this is a great person to have on our podcast.

Whether you are in the LA area or overseas, I highly recommend Gae and her classes, healings and events. Working with Gae in person is very powerful but remotely has been just as impactful.

You can find Gae here.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gigiitsme/

https://www.instagram.com/thedopesouljourney/

thedopesouljourney.com

thedopesouljourney@gmail.com

HIS DAD'S SECRET FAMILY

Thu, 04 Mar 2021 08:30:00 -0800

Would you rather a dad who isn't around or a dad who is present your whole life but emotionally unavailable?We continue our conversation with comedian Sandy Danto who has lived out my biggest fear, finding out his dad has a secret family. Sandy's parents divorced ten years ago and his dad, who seemed to be disinterested most of his life, has become a better dad to his mistress' kids than he was to his own.

We discuss how Sandy overcame his struggles with his dad, set boundaries and has learnt how to not make the same mistakes his dad did. He also gets Bobby to open up about his passions like cartoon films, Jaco Pastorius and most importantly, Disney's Coco.

Follow Sandy on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandydanto/

Check out his parenting podcast M'fers: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mfers-a-parenting-podcast-with-sandy-danto/id1399693949

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

Whether it be advice you need, advice for us or questions you think we should ask each other, we want to hear from you ! E-mail us what you would like to hear or activity ideas whoadadpodcast@gmail.com

DAD OF THE MONTH: SANDY DANTO

Fri, 19 Feb 2021 12:33:43 -0800

This part one of a two part episode with the insanely funny comedian, Sandy Danto, saves the podcast. Sandy is the ultimate Bobby whisper. From topics like who my dad has played with to his regrets about choosing his career over his family, Sandy gets my dad to open up about things I didn't think he would ever share. In return, Bobby channels his Joe Rogan and asks Sandy all the comedy questions.

Sandy, a touring comedian a paid regular at The Comedy Store and Hollywood Improv, is a new dad with his second one on the way. He shares what it takes to have a strong father-daughter relationship and what he has had to sacrifice in his career in order to not be a dad like Bobby. Does it come down to making the choice between career or fatherhood? Before he was a dad, Sandy has had a pretty epic career working as a writer, director and producer at National Lampoon, opener for Pauly Shore and a touring comedian. Although they made different choices, both dads can understand each others sides.

Next week Sandy shares his daddy issues when his dad leaves his family for another women and is now playing "good dad" to her kids instead.

Follow Sandy on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sandydanto/

And check out his parenting podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mfers-a-parenting-podcast-with-sandy-danto/id1399693949

NICORETTE PREVENTS CORONA VIRUS?

Thu, 04 Feb 2021 12:53:26 -0800

Bobby leads the charge on this one and this time I mean it. Consider yourself a fly on the wall during an average phone call between me and my dad when we aren't recording. He comes to the table with some facts that you can't get anywhere else like, how Nicorette can prevent Corona Virus, and make for a really good bouncy ball. He tries to cure my abandonment issues by getting me to read his horoscope description of capricorns. Thinking that it will help me to understand who he is and help our father-daughter relationship.

Finally taking the back seat and letting my dad run wild with the conversation, this episode is a mishmash of topics: Behaviour of Capricorns , all the different things Nicorette is useful for, a recording of the first song we wrote together, a sad Covid story (cause that's what everyone wants to hear right now), aliens and of course, Bob Lazar.

THE DRUG TALK

Thu, 28 Jan 2021 09:51:28 -0800

I want to go on a spiritual journey and do drugs to “find myself”. My dad gives me advice on what kind of drugs I should and shouldn’t do. The best way to get your kid to never do drugs is to scare the s*** out of them. And my dads drug stories from the road will do just that. Between his friends overdosing to him getting tricked into eating weed brownies, making his so high they had to call in a new drummer, these drug horror stories may teach your kid a thing or two.

The up side of being a distant dad is that he never had to deal with a rebellious teen getting wasted in high school. I fill him in on my drunken and high times in ninth grade to see what he would have done. Turns out his approach is scarier than I thought.

Dad Of The Month: ANTHONY DAYO

Fri, 22 Jan 2021 08:30:00 -0800

Comedian Anthony Dayo is this months spotlight. Which is a dad who's had to face some tough situations and who's story we can learn from. Similar to my dad and I, Dayo is a distant dad who lives in LA while his daughter lives in Philadelphia and he is doing a pretty good job at maintaining a close father daughter relationship from a far. Dayo shares what it was like having a daughter at 21, moving to LA, juggling a comedy career with fatherhood and protecting his daughter from the cruelness of social media. Maintaining a relationship with a teenage daughter isn’t easy but Dayo has figured out creative ways to stay connected as a distant dad.

My dad and Dayo bond over how hard it can be to talk to your kid on the phone. The one thing they have in common is, they both believe it's important to keep the lines of communication open. Which means not coming down on their kids too hard when they do something wrong in fear of chasing them away. Dayo wants his daughter to always feel comfortable talking to him about anything and my dad, who's done a good job at that, feels the same way. There is something to be said about having that parent that you know you can talk to about embarrassing things like the way a boy is treating you or teenage drama.

Dayo is open and honest about dealing with the dad he was dealt and I've learnt a lot from this conversation.

Follow him at https://www.instagram.com/anthonyday0/

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

Nikki's Instagram: @nikkibon

Whoa, Dad! Instagram: @whoadadpodcast

OUR HAUNTED HOUSE

Thu, 14 Jan 2021 11:59:16 -0800

Don’t believe in ghosts or aliens? You might after this episode. My dad was a tough nut to crack this time round until we get into his favorite topics: aliens, ghosts, unexplained phenomena and Bob Lezar. When I was a baby, my mom and dad moved into a haunted house. They knew it was haunted when 1 year old me would talk to “the man”. My dad dives deep into his traumatic experiences of living with a ghost and why aliens do exist.

BOBBY MEETS A 5 YEAR OLD

Thu, 07 Jan 2021 12:51:58 -0800

Five year old Alo and his mom Kate, join us on this weeks episode to see if I have made any progress trying to teach my dad how to talk to children. Bobby pulls out the big guns and tries to keep the kid engaged by getting him to sing a song, asking him to identify what he is pointing to and making up rhymes on the spot. Alo, who is probably smarter than all of us, isn’t afraid to tell my dad when he is bored. And my dad, one of the most accepting people I know, encourages his honesty. Makes me think I should have spoke my mind more as a kid. After all, our father-daughter relationship didn't get better until I finally became more honest with him.

Being a distant dad trying to engage with a kid on the phone is tough and is something my dad always struggled with. Last few episodes I tried to teach him tactics and things he could have done to get me to open up. So what better way to practice these parenting skills than having having a kid on the podcast.

The fun doesn't stop there. My dad gives Alo's mom, Kate, one of his famous fruit readings. And he is pretty spot on. Kate is a hard read but my dad, the empath he is, picks up on all of her characteristics.

If you want more information about Kate's non-profit you can find it here

http://eistworks.org

Want a fruit reading like Kate? All you have to do is sign up to https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon and let us know.

A HOLIDAY SPECIAL - PERFORMED BY BOBBY

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:13:14 -0800

My dad reads 'The Night Before Christmas' in the most Bobby way possible, with a groove, percussion and vocal breaks.

Since we won't see each other on Christmas, not like we ever did, I figure why not start a father-daughter tradition and read a Christmas story every year. My dad was surprisingly enthusiastic about the idea, especially when he discovered he could turn the classic holiday tale into a hot track.

A lot of parents sit down with their kids to read this story every Christmas eve and since we didn't spend Christmas together, my dad is reading this for the first time. Bobby comes to realize he had missed out on a lot more than just the memory. 'The Night Before Christmas' opens his eyes to "cool" terms like "the moon on the breast", gets his creative juices flowing, and discovers a potential hook for a chorus when he reads "on dasher, on prancer, on Donder, and Blitzen". By the end of it my dad has gone from Bobby, to little drummer boy.

Grab a cup of coco, a blanket and sit back and relax as little drummer Bobby performs 'The Night Before Christmas'. Join in if you like.

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of sugar plums danced in their heads. And Mama in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap.

When out on the roof there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash,
tore open the shutter, and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow gave the lustre of midday to objects below, when, what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles, his coursers they came,
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name:

"Now Dasher! Now Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet! On, Cupid!
On, Donner and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch!
To the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"

WILL YOU BE MY DAD INSTEAD?

Thu, 17 Dec 2020 10:36:19 -0800

We are continuing on from last weeks episode "Will you be my neighbor". My dad and I reenact our painful phone conversations in hopes that I can give him a better understanding of different ways to try and bond with me. His biggest complaint about trying to establish a stronger father-daughter relationship is that I was impossible to talk to on the phone. This time round, I paint him a better picture of the type of kid I was. My dad didn't know at the time that I was bullied by my friends and I had anxiety about people liking me. So much so that I would bring my babysitters kids bags of change so they would be nice to me. All of this worry is what made me even more closed off. And what kid feels comfortable opening up about to an adult, let alone their estranged dad, about they're insecurities and fears. Once my dad got to the root cause he gave some pretty good fatherly advice.

In order for me to understand his side, we reverse roles and I play the parent trying to crack little drummer Bobby. I realized trying to connect with your kid is actually a lot harder than it seemed. Especially if the child is closed off. Or in this instance, tells you they are bored of talking to you. Little drummer Bobby's brutal honesty has surpassed my abandonment issues and resurfaced my fear of rejection and being liked. Am I boring?

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

Nikki's Instagram: @nikkibon

Whoa, Dad! Instagram: @whoadadpodcast

WILL YOU BE MY NEIGHBOR

Thu, 10 Dec 2020 10:43:40 -0800

This week I took a step back and let my dad take the reins on this weeks episode. And it was exactly what I expected. Bobby discusses all of his favourite things that you may have already heard about: bathroom problems, joke writing, how difficult I was to talk to as a kid, police brutality and of course, his favourite, Mr.Rogers.
I try to get Bobby to role play and relive what it was like to talk to me as a child. How to really get into the childs mind. But the only way I can get him to talk to “little Nikki” is if he gets to play Mr. Rogers. Much like his reaction to my engagement, my dad quickly abandons the role of father trying to connect to his daughter and becomes father trying to warn his daughter against police.

FATHER? I'M ENGAGED

Thu, 03 Dec 2020 11:18:02 -0800

I got engaged and going to tell my distant dad the big news over the podcast. This is normally an exciting announcement for a traditional father and daughter. But I had a feeling he wasn't going to have a classic father of the bride reaction. And I was right. Bobby jumps straight to the point and asks me a very important question..."did you hear the protests in Portland".

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

Nikki's Instagram: @nikkibon

Whoa, Dad! Instagram: @whoadadpodcast

DA DA? WHY HAVEN'T YOU CALLED?

Thu, 26 Nov 2020 10:47:45 -0800

Since Bobby left I've been feeling a little uneasy. I haven't heard from him and it seems that we have gone back to a distant relationship. It feels like the same father-daughter relationship we had before and my abandonment issues have hit a high. He hasn't called me or reached out very much since he left. And to top it all off, covid hit, I would hope that my dad would be in touch during a pandemic. Instead of e-mailing my feelings about him being an absent dad again, I ask him face to face, well, through the podcast.

Bobby explains why he hasn't been in touch and why he didn't give a proper goodbye. Turns out his fatherly instincts kicked in on the last night when he thought he shouldn't interrupt me and my boyfriend on the couch incase we were, you know...heavy petting? Gross.

Bobby gives me advice about what to do to save money during covid but his tips almost lead to me losing my car.

In the spirit of thanksgiving, Bobby shares his most memorable thanksgiving story from when he was a child. Warning, his thanksgiving doesn't have a happy ending. It's not the magical thanksgiving story you're probably wanting to hear. But hey, this is real life, not a Christmas movie.

YERTLE THE TURTLE

Fri, 20 Nov 2020 12:59:43 -0800

We have only a few hours left before we say our goodbyes and Bobby heads back home. So this is the last time I’ll be able to teach him how to be a dad, in person. Before we continue our podcast and distant relationship through zoom, Bobby drops the bomb that he thinks I play the victim and I’m manipulative. I confess, I am manipulative but I only play victim in a joking manner. Being a comedian who has an absent dad, it’s hard not to heighten my abandonment issues and turn it into a comedic bit.

We finally do the one father daughter activity Bobby has been dreading this whole time, reading me a bedtime story. Part of learning how to be a great dad is doing some of the things you don’t want to do and Bobby is accepting that’s part of fatherhood. So today, Bobby reads me Yertle the Turtle by Dr.Zeus. And don’t worry, there’s voices.

Bobby gets passionate about the messages Yertle the Turtle provides, especially in relationship to the republican government. This episode is more than just a bedtime story. It turns into a history lesson about Tesla, the Akashic Records and clairvoyant Edgar Cayce. And to top it all off, Bobby describes a visit from his dead dad. And I thought my dad was distant? His came back from the grave. Now that’s a good dad.

I become doubtful about our progress when Bobby brings up calling me sexy and Mr.Rogers again. If he didn’t remember that we already covered this, how is he going to remember what I teach him about how to be a dad? I don’t think we got everything done or even that I wanted to but I am practicing patients and realize that this is going to take a lot longer than a week.

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

Nikki's Instagram: @nikkibon

Whoa, Dad! Instagram: @whoadadpodcast

FAMILY CIRCUS

Thu, 12 Nov 2020 08:30:00 -0800

Bobby comes from a long line of circus folk and Nikki is determined to learn about his side of the family. After Nikki teaches Bobby how to cook one of the most difficult dishes known to...Goldie Lox? The two get into his family history over a nice bowl of porridge, which Bobby has made for the first time ever. Very questionable. Bobby tells tails of his mom who rode in a headstand, on a motorcycle, while going across a tight rope wire. And his dad was an acrobat. His parents met in the circus trying to escape the war and from there Bobby became a circus kid.

IT'S OK TO CRUSH ON MY COUSIN?

Thu, 29 Oct 2020 12:13:22 -0700

Bobby and I are starting to get a bit annoyed with each other (if you couldn’t tell) and we are coming to the end of our time together. I’m becoming more controlling and he’s making me that way!

It all started with a confrontation over the microwave. On the plus side we’ve gotten close enough that we’re starting to call each other out… but is this really a good thing? How much progress are we really making?

So, we’ve decided to try to improve our father-daughter relationship further with a tip from the “how to be a good dad” blog post we went through a few episodes back (see: Your Texas Suck)... we’re going to learn Spanish together. My hope is high, but my expectations are very low.

Needless to say, our quest to learn Spanish wasn’t the most productive it could have been and it didn’t help that Bobby decided to take a phone call in the middle of it but we did cover a few other… weird topics. It turns out Bobby decided to perv on our online Spanish teacher (who by-the-way is in a video, not a live person), we talked about a Valentine’s surprise he gave me as a kid, a really disappointing Christmas and he thinks it’s OK to crush on your cousin because it’s just a phase.

It’s time to do some parenting scenarios with the childhood version of me so we can learn how to be a dad, and Bobby’s got some weird advice to share. Distant dads, maybe don’t take a phone call in the middle of reconnecting with your father. Daughters, reconnecting is hard and those insecure feelings are totally normal.

This is a frustrating one but I think we made a little bit of progress? Here’s to hoping! And don’t use the microwave, it’s not good for you.

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

BIRDS AND THE BEES

Thu, 22 Oct 2020 09:11:00 -0700

We are back for another attempt to teach Bobby how to be a dad. The operative word being attempt. Today we’re talking about the birds and the bees, and a few other awkward conversations that parents have with their children.

It turns out I inherited Bobby’s messy gene. I’m over here trying to set a great example of how to clean up after yourself and I realize that I’m still acting like the parent in the relationship.

But today we’ve decided to attempt to tackle a parenthood rite of passage, the birds and the bees talk. This is going to be an uncomfortable one, Bobby’s always been a little inappropriate so it’s going to be interesting to see if he can manage to teach me about the birds and the bees and other important topics without going into details that aren’t appropriate for the talk.

This episode is packed full of tidbits of information you probably never knew (and maybe didn’t need to), like why it’s actually called the birds and the bees. But that’s not the only father-daughter talk we’re going to have today, we’re tackling ALL of the topics he missed out on when I was a teen. Sit in while we have a (somewhat painful) chat about getting your first period, how babies are made and having protected sex. Don’t worry, we’re all a little bit confused.

These are all important talks that parents have with their children as they grow up, but since I had a distant relationship with my dad we didn’t have any of them. They’re a little awkward, but a truly important step.

I should point out that Bobby gets a point for doing what he describes as a “dad thing” and helping me with a slight computer issue. This episode is a wild ride, probably my favorite so far, so enjoy!

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

THE ENIGMA MAN

Thu, 15 Oct 2020 08:33:00 -0700

Despite Bobby (aka the enigma man) feeling “internal” today he’s made the very fatherly decision to join me anyway, and in this episode our big topic is how to communicate with your daughter as an absent father who’s trying to be less… well, absent. While I was waiting for my dad to call me, he was, as he puts it, "let be and let god". For me? Let be and let abandonment issues get worse and worse. Hey dad? Are you ever gonna call me?

We’re diving into the expectation vs. reality of father-daughter relationships and talking about parenting at its finest, like who should fold clothes, check on the laundry and how dad’s parenting claim-to-fame is that he changed my diapers as a baby and “facilitated” an accidental teaching moment. In order to overcome my tit-for-tat mentality, we open the flood gates and share my resentments.

Bobby says the key to relationships is not taking someone for granted. So, I explain my philosophy on equal-effort exchange relationships and why I don’t go out of my way to make him coffee (and definitely won’t fold his clothes).

We’re talking all about how distant dads connect with their kids, and what I really needed to hear as a child frame of mind. If you’re wondering how to communicate with your teenage daughter over the phone (or, in person for that matter) you need to hear this: giving your kids space and waiting until they’re ready isn’t the key to building that relationship.

Instead, you need to reach out. Kids suck at talking to adults—that’s why you get uninvested responses like “school was fine.” If you’re looking to really make an impact, try connecting with kids through stories. Sharing your experiences with them, even if you think they don’t want to hear it, might just be the key to giving you that something you need to start rebuilding your relationship.

And, if you’re the daughter of an absentee father, there’s something in here for you too. Sometimes, dads suck at being dads (whether they’re there all the time or not). They’re nervous, unsure and they have no idea what to do. Being open, honest and talking about things that might seem uncomfortable could bring on a whole new level of understanding.

Life is full of lessons, and today’s is a great one. Don't leave your kid hanging on the other line waiting for you to call.

This isn't vulnerable enough for you? Or you just want to support? Sign up to Patreon to have access to our e-mail correspondences that did a number on our relationship, videos, unedited eps and classic documented Bobby moments.

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If you want to learn more about me, or this podcast, check out https://www.nikkibon.com/.

HOMEWORK, SWEAT AND TEARS

Thu, 08 Oct 2020 09:07:25 -0700

It’s time for Bobby to help me with some homework—we’re skipping math class this time and going straight for the adult stuff. I’ve got an audition and he’s going to help me prepare for it like he’s a dad helping his daughter with her homework. Let’s do this!

Before we get to the good stuff, we’re starting out with some parenting practice because it’s time that someone learns how to be a dad. Bobby never had to take care of me when I was sick (that we know of) and I’m feeling a bit under-the-weather, so he’s sharing how dad’s take care of their children when they’re sick… and he’s not doing the best job.

Bobby’s having some issues treating me like a child for some of our exercises. He’s not understanding the idea that as an absent father, he missed out on a few important things in my life and I’m trying to teach him how to be a father and what being a dad is all about.

But once we’ve gotten through the sick talk, it’s Bobby’s time to shine. He’s got some serious acting chops that he’s going to bless us all with while he acts like a responsible dad helping with homework. That is, until he volunteered to direct me then quickly offloaded the responsibility to my boyfriend Matt because he’s worried his direction is going to come off wrong. Absent fatherhood 1: Bobby 0.

It’s an interesting learning experience with Bobby—taking care of sick kids, helping with homework, learning how to be a good father and a very convincing fake crying session.

Make sure you listen all the way to the end of the episode where I share a great listener email. I got a note from a childhood friend who sent me something really insightful about what if Bobby had been around when I was a kid. It’s something everyone with an absent father should hear.

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

Nikki's Insta: https://www.instagram.com/nikkibon/

Whoa, Dad! Insta: https://www.instagram.com/whoadadpodcast/

THE CRINGER (Full Episode)

Thu, 01 Oct 2020 18:56:41 -0700

Bobby and I just went out for brunch where he spent the majority of the time doing anything but having a conversation with me. Because our father-daughter relationship is awkward at best, there was that weird reaching-for-the-wallet experience—I was too early on the draw and ended up paying the bill!

Getting stories out of Bobby is impossible, which sucks because the man has truly lived. He’s played with Nancy Sinatra, Herbie Hancock, Jaco Pastorius, The Who—he’s a pro drummer (which, in essence, is why he was an absent father) and he has some real life experience that so far I’ve only learned about through Google. But I want to hear about his life as a musician in his own words, and this episode is about trying to make that happen.

Gum is a big issue between us and we’re going to try to get to the bottom of it. We’re also talking about Bobby’s addictions and his messy trait that I definitely inherited. He ends up sharing some insights into his experience with alcoholism but refuses to share some of his juicer stories. So, I decide to try sharing some of my own experiences to get him to open up.

This is the issue with having a distant dad, I’m itching to know what his life was like. He was an absent father who got a chance to have a life of his own and experience these secrets that I don’t know about him. One of the best ways for him to learn how to be a dad is to open up, it’s a chance for me to understand what parts of me come from him.

I did manage to pull a few stories out of him though so here for your listening pleasure is how a lobster ended up in Bobby’s symbol bag and a few other gems.

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon.

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers my abandonment issues.

HUFFING AND PUFFING

Thu, 24 Sep 2020 08:49:32 -0700

It’s time for Bobby and I do do our first father daughter activity: hiking. Last episode we went through a blog list of tips for how to be a great dad and while we didn’t love every suggestion (honestly, some of them were down right creepy) we decided a few of them might be worth trying out, you’re welcome.

Bobby’s seemingly just figured out that he’s been an absent dad thus far and we don’t know anything about each other. This epiphany has led him to understand that had he been around during my childhood we’d know a lot more about each other and he has NO idea how to be a dad… it’s taken him a bit too long to realize this but I’m glad that we might finally be on the same page.

Dad’s carrying the backpack, check. Sunscreen, check. We’re on our first father-daughter hike and Bobby says he’s feeling pretty good about it.

During our walk, we’re covering some of our memories for when I’m younger like the time I almost fell out of the roller coaster, crying in front of my dad, how he’s basically the inverter of snowboarding and a few other historic gems. But the conversation derails itself when Bobby shares that he thinks a woman younger than I am is hot—the only point I’ll give him is that he realized it was inappropriate… after the fact.

Bobby’s also sharing his belief system with me, some experiences he had when he was younger and an epiphany he had while driving one night. We’re getting into some deep conversations this week and it gets a little weird.

With activity number one complete, I’m going to chalk it up to a success. My distant dad still struggles because he always put himself first but I think we’re making some progress.

Want to read the emails that we talk about but were too vulnerable to share on the podcast? Sign up to our patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nikkibon

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers my abandonment issues.

Whether it be advice you need, advice for us or questions you think we should ask each other, we want to hear from you ! Email us what you would like to hear or activity ideas whoadadpodcast@gmail.com

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YOUR TEXAS SUCK

Fri, 18 Sep 2020 07:00:00 -0700

Bobby has basically moved in. He’s got his AA and self help books spread around the kitchen, there’s Nicorette gum everywhere and his laptop that’s weirdly hooked up to an external hard drive is sitting on the table ALL THE TIME. So, I think it’s time we dig into everything that it takes to become a good dad.

Bobby brings up a recent text conversation that caused him a lot of anxiety and tension. After reading Bobby's side (side A) and I read my side (side B) we realize that we were misinterpreting each others "texas" (texts). Lesson is texting and e-mailing your feelings suck. Bobby makes Nikki promise to only share her feelings to his face...f***.

We’ve found a blog post on what it takes to be a good dad and we’re going to go through the list and see which ones we like the best. So, here are some of the things it takes to be a good dad:

Spend time with them
Tell family stories
Start a tradition
Read together before bed
Discipline with love and positive parenting
Be a role model
Eat together
Seek involvement early
Walk, stretch and meditate
Put their interest first
Spend spare time together
Teach self-esteem
Teach finances
Learn a language together
Give hugs
Play with them

It turns out Bobby doesn’t love the list. He’s pro starting a family tradition but not so on-board with disciplining with love and positive parenting. We’re comparing and contrasting how well he did on this list as I grew up, and his score isn’t exactly a passing grade.

This is a great lesson for distant dads and their daughters who want to restore their father-daughter relationship. It might be a little hard to go back through the list and make up for some of the lost time, but there’s more than enough that you can start doing today to make up for lost time—we might go for a hike, learn a language together or Bobby might teach me how to ride a unicycle?

It’s been a weird journey so far, and we’re just getting started!

You can support, sign up and check out our clips, unedited eps, emails, videos and basically all the things that we are too embarrassed to share and triggers Nikki's abandonment issues.

DON‘T CALL ME SEXY

Tue, 08 Sep 2020 15:25:49 -0700

Bobby has never had to censor himself in front of a child before, so there are a few things he doesn’t quite understand and this episode is FULL of them.

Welcome to the part of the podcast where my distant dad justifies calling me sexy because of my career (sadly, not a joke), quotes Kung Fu Panda, continues to chew Nicorette into the microphone and gets weirdly philosophical… again. But guys, I swear Bobby’s not creepy.

Lesson number one for how to be a dad: don’t call your daughter sexy under any circumstance. If you take only one thing away from this episode, let it be that. Distant dads all around the world it’s time to learn what you can and can’t do when hanging out with your child—hint, it’s nothing like hanging out with your kids. This list includes:

Calling your daughter sexy
Hot, yeah that’s also out of bounds
Saying anything that you save for your girlfriend
Having naked photos of women out when your kids are around
Watching films that are inappropriate for their age
Dating someone who’s younger than your daughter
Bedroom-related comments, kids don’t need to hear that

It’s not that long of a list but you might want to grab a pen for this one. Dad’s this is a great one if you want to know how to communicate with your daughter. If you find yourself getting into sticky situations and starting out-of-bound conversations, then it’s time for you to tune in.

Bobby and I are on a long journey where I teach him how to be a father. Not just for ourselves but for all of the distance dads and their daughters out there. If you’re looking to rebuild your father-daughter relationship, this is an episode you need to listen to.

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THE HISTORY LESSON

Wed, 02 Sep 2020 17:17:31 -0700

My dad has just arrived in L.A. and we're about to spend the most amount of time together we have in our life—one week. He's 65, I'm 33, and we haven't spent more than five days together. This could be a disaster.

See, Bobby wasn't around most of my life—he's a rock n'roll drummer (need I say more)—and for most of my life we’ve had an awkward, distant, pretty much non-existent relationship. He was an absent father. But a few years ago my friend's dad passed away and it made me realize how much I didn’t know about my dad and that I wanted to change that.

This isn’t the first time we’ve tried to re-establish our father-daughter relationship—but we’re ready to try again. However, I’ve come to realize that he’s jumping into fatherhood at 65 and needs a little help. I’m going to have to teach him how to be a dad. And I figured why not document this journey?

This episode is all about the history of our father-daughter relationship. We’re heading back in time to discuss some of my childhood memories and how Bobby remembers them. He’s sharing his insights into our early relationship and talking about what he would do differently if he could go back now. It’s an interesting comparison—his memory versus mine.

We’re covering the time that I felt like my dad really saw me, my young adult belief that my identity was that I didn’t have a relationship with my dad and how getting information out of him is like pulling teeth. Somehow we also manage to cover Bobby’s curly hair, Mr. Rogers (the HBO documentary and not the Tom Hanks version) and fake news? I might regret this decision...

They say parenting is a life-long journey, I think it's high time for Bobby to learn how to be a father, care to come along for the ride?

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Trailer

Sun, 23 Aug 2020 10:20:01 -0700

Whoa, Dad! trailer with Nikki Bon and her dad, retired drummer Bobby Economou.