Substance for Days

Episode 1 - A Test

Thu, 03 Mar 2022 23:25:30 +0000

This is a test of our live stream

Episode 2 - Let’s Give It A Go

Fri, 04 Mar 2022 21:50:42 +0000

In this episode, we find our feet in the world of live podcast streaming. We talk about Glasto, Mccartney, Bond, The Batman, Monsters Inc. You name it, we find a way of making light of it.

Reach out to us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and TikTok for more information.

@substance4days - Twitter, Snapchat
@substancefordays - TikTok, Instagram, Facebook

Episode 3 - Neil Yeung, Maxwell and Deja vu

Tue, 08 Mar 2022 20:39:17 +0000

In this episode we talk about the rise and fall of a magician, out on 8 years on good behaviour and Morrisons

Reach out to us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and TikTok for more information.

@substance4days - Twitter, Snapchat
@substancefordays - TikTok, Instagram, Facebook

Episode 4 - It’s A Trap!

Thu, 10 Mar 2022 18:00:08 +0000

In this episode, we talk about Zorg, Supermarkets and disappointing documentaries

Reach out to us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and TikTok for more information.

@substance4days - Twitter, Snapchat
@substancefordays - TikTok, Instagram, Facebook

Episode 5 - Darren Carter

Tue, 15 Mar 2022 20:15:12 +0000

Today we talk about our friends overseas and of course.. Paul Mcartney

Episode 6 - LIVE Comic Relief for Days

Thu, 17 Mar 2022 22:03:37 +0000

In this episode, we raise some money for Comic Relief and talk about some of our favourite funny makers from the past and present.

Episode 8 - You’re All Hired!

Wed, 23 Mar 2022 19:50:08 +0000

In this episode, we have a chat about Corey’s Angels, P&O Ferries and Rappers becoming household names by other means

Episode 7 - Double O Skeletor

Thu, 24 Mar 2022 11:25:27 +0000

In this episode, we salute the true warriors of the Amazon Rainforest and the scavengers of undeserved fame

Episode 9 - Hasta La Vista, Nanny

Tue, 29 Mar 2022 19:44:21 +0100

In this episode we talk about back alley threesomes, Hunter Hearst Heart Failure and of course, the Oscars

Episode 10 LIVE - We Made It!

Thu, 31 Mar 2022 20:27:21 +0100

In this episode, we talk about dynamite, dead wrestlers and a boogy woogy on a Piano

Episode 11 - Egg.

Tue, 05 Apr 2022 20:15:27 +0100

In this episode, we talk about Red Hot Chillis, Meat Attacks and the Brothers Gallagher

Episode 12 LIVE - Overplayed

Wed, 06 Apr 2022 20:31:39 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we and a few guests talk about songs we love to hate and songs we hate to love

Episode 13 - Killing Time

Tue, 12 Apr 2022 20:11:40 +0100

In this episode, we talk about the death of a construct, microchip implants and backstreets back, alright?

Episode 14 LIVE - Strawberry Lawsuits

Thu, 14 Apr 2022 21:01:29 +0100

In this live stream, we talk to our listeners and get some ideas on some of the most ridiculous law suits, religious where’s Wally and Tree Thieves

Episode 15 LIVE - Existentialism; It will get you

Thu, 21 Apr 2022 20:51:17 +0100

In this live episode, we talk about meatball ice cream, attack of the Gallagher and a 60,000 year old… egg

Episode 16 - Its About Substance

Tue, 26 Apr 2022 21:04:28 +0100

In this episode, we talk about some new initiatives, Johnny Depp and expensive watches

Episode 17 LIVE - Kitty

Thu, 28 Apr 2022 21:19:20 +0100

In this live episode, we talk about cat names, our 18 year old selves and little baby Keith

Episode 18 - Asking For A Friend

Tue, 03 May 2022 20:08:32 +0100

In this episode, we talk about ankle boots, met gala and bad politicians

Episode 19 - Any Regrets?

Thu, 05 May 2022 20:10:49 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we talk about whether we should regret anything, Mrs Kitty from Sidcup and 500 downloads

Episode 20 - Fire The Nanny

Tue, 10 May 2022 19:40:36 +0100

In this episode, we talk about The Gull Cull, Gonk of the Week and Beergate

Episode 21 LIVE - Substance Abusers

Thu, 12 May 2022 20:06:11 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we talk about weird jobs, side hustles and a man with a cock on his arm

Episode 22 - Dont Call Me Baldy

Wed, 18 May 2022 19:35:24 +0100

In this episode, we talk about Wasp Boy, the Barlow Buffet and Tory Top Trumps. Please visit our new website to subscribe for newsletters and bonus content! https://zipistream.com/u/Substancefordays

Episode 23 LIVE - We’re Late For Madonna

Thu, 19 May 2022 20:29:31 +0100

In this live episode, we talk about Madonna’s wrinkly NFT, 184million reasons to be unhappy and PC 9 to 5. If you like what you hear, please subscribe to our Zipistream channel where we produce monthly newsletters and bonus content! https://zipistream.com/u/Substancefordays

Episode 24 - Don’t Poke The Lion

Tue, 24 May 2022 20:09:26 +0100

In this episode, we talk about the behaviours of drivers during an apocalypse, a brave lion tamer and a Ukrainian home wrecker. https://zipistream.com/u/Substancefordays

Episode 25 LIVE - Who’s For Matcha?

Thu, 26 May 2022 20:03:45 +0100

In this episode we talk about crazy pilots, Eurovision controversy and expensive pets

Episode 26 - That’s Alright

Tue, 31 May 2022 19:47:34 +0100

In this episode, we talk about fluffy hamster grenades, Mona Lisa and Embarrassing Mums

Episode 1 LIVE - The Mandela Jubilee

Thu, 02 Jun 2022 20:23:50 +0100

It's the platinum jubilee, its episode 1 of Season 2. In this live show, we talk about HRH's 70 year experience, Curious George and his lack of appendages and Depp and Turd

Episode 2 - Prince Vladimir

Tue, 07 Jun 2022 19:00:00 +0100

In this episode, we revisit some tried and tested conspiracy theories, look at the earnings of some of our fellow man and check out Bieber's new job as a gas pump attendant

Episode 3 LIVE - Antique Steps Need a Fixin

Fri, 10 Jun 2022 20:13:16 +0100

In this Live episode, we talk about some very expensive steps and have special guest appearances from Jordan Peterson, David Attenborough and Paul McCartney.

Episode 4 - Dirty Whale

Tue, 14 Jun 2022 20:46:32 +0100

In this episode, we have a flick through the urban dictionary, set our sights on a haunted podcast special and cheer on a sailor heading for certain doom.

Fancy giving this a go yourself? Sign up for a free one month trial using the following link!

https://www.podbean.com/sfdfree

Episode 5 LIVE - Johnny Long Fin

Thu, 16 Jun 2022 20:07:34 +0100

In this episode, we whip through some of our favourite features, take a look at our friends the Kardashians and get a visit from the Queen.

Remember, if you'd like to give this a go yourself, head over to www.podbean.com/sfdfree for one months free trial!

Season 2 Episode 5 - 25ft Homewrecker

Tue, 21 Jun 2022 20:01:32 +0100

In this episode, we take a moment to clarify the definition of a joke, with Mr Bean's help, we talk about an erected eyesore and Katie Price taking the next top spot on Britain's Got Talent

Episode 6 Live - #octothorp

Thu, 23 Jun 2022 20:16:50 +0100

In this live episode, we have a chat about our best friend Kim K, defend a man’s love for his horse and play truth or LOB

S2 Ep7 - This is a Trans World

Tue, 28 Jun 2022 20:11:54 +0100

In this episode, we call back to one of our first podcasts and discuss Glasto with "Over the hill" Ross, Gender Neutrality in schools and tennis and charging children for inflation.

S2 Ep 8 LIVE - Boris and Doris, Get Back In The Boat

Thu, 30 Jun 2022 20:21:38 +0100

In this episode, one half of Substance For Days talks about a rag-doll pregnancy, Meerkat's overboard and facepalm headlines.

S2 Ep9 - Sustancia Por Dias

Tue, 05 Jul 2022 19:47:47 +0100

In this episode, we welcome back a fellow co-host, celebrate a new downloads milestone and talk smack about Sir Cliff

S2 Ep 10 LIVE - Floppy is gone!

Thu, 07 Jul 2022 20:51:34 +0100

In this live episode, we talk about non-immediate departure of our chosen leader, his ghostly counterpart overseas and urban dictionary makes a triumphant return.

S2 Ep 11 - Christ Crispies

Tue, 12 Jul 2022 19:50:28 +0100

In this episode, we give a salute to Greggs take on Yeezy's, catch an STI from a car for cash and some more urban slang is defined.

S2 Ep 12 LIVE - Nooooooo

Thu, 14 Jul 2022 20:07:20 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we practice some ASMR techniques, Gonk of the week is back and our usual guessing game of inappropriate words continues.

S2 Ep 13 LIVE - Dad Jokes

Thu, 21 Jul 2022 20:01:28 +0100

In this live episode, we reflect on the record breaking heat, Yeezy turns Italian and a new feature is released - Dad Jokes.

S2 Ep14 - Would You Rather

Tue, 26 Jul 2022 21:01:49 +0100

In this episode, we ask some no way out Would You Rather questions, we consider a cage match between Shane and Stephanie and the cost of living crisis hits an all time low.

S2 Ep15 LIVE - So Many Piercings!

Thu, 28 Jul 2022 21:07:44 +0100

In this live episode, we get some interaction from our listeners on tattoos, ghosts make an unlikely appearance and we have a special rendition of the well known song, Ken Lee

S2 Ep16 - Grave Dicker

Tue, 02 Aug 2022 19:35:51 +0100

In this episode, we talk about Jet Setters destroying the planet, a couple of dad jokes for good measure and Pamela Anderson from Wish

https://www.podbean.com/sfdfree

LS2 Ep17 LIVE - Remi Tomato

Thu, 04 Aug 2022 21:22:08 +0100

In this live episode, we put the feelers out to our faithful listeners to give us something to moan about, gender neutrality strikes again and we end with a positive motivational quote from our inspirations over in Atlanta Georgia

S2 Ep18 - Hippity Hop for Days

Tue, 09 Aug 2022 19:00:00 +0100

In a slightly off-agenda episode, we take a moment to "Wax Lyrical" about some Hip-hop goat's, deliver some truly upsetting news about our Kim K and tip our hat to our listenership milestone.

S2 Ep19 - Grimm Tales

Thu, 11 Aug 2022 20:03:45 +0100

In this live episode, we revisit the world of hippity hop, introduce a new (shock) feature - parp weekly - and discuss the harrowing tales of some of Disney's greatest classics.

https://www.podbean.com/sfdfree

S2 Ep20 - Fender Bender

Tue, 16 Aug 2022 19:43:38 +0100

In this episode we hit up some recaps - the current vehicle situation for our co-host, some more of Disney's beloved animations scrutinised for their dark history and some of this weeks outrageous news stories.

https://www.podbean.com/sfdfree

S2 Ep21 LIVE - The Game and Ghouls

Thu, 18 Aug 2022 20:12:25 +0100

In this live episode, we break down the terrible attempt at trying to knock a Goat and tell some spooky stories from the internets wildest imagination.

S2 Ep22 - The Culture of The Matrix

Tue, 23 Aug 2022 19:00:00 +0100

In this episode, we talk about culture, the mystery around deja vu and the ongoing plight of the innate human condition to seek a wild cauliflower.

https://www.podbean.com/sfdfree

S2 Ep23 LIVE - Alberta

Thu, 25 Aug 2022 20:55:21 +0100

In this live episode, we push on with some truly frightening and grossly inaccurate ghost stories, our urban dictionary feature makes a triumphant return and we make a promise to our avid listeners.

S2 Ep24 LIVE - Joist

Fri, 02 Sep 2022 08:50:31 +0100

In this live episode, we go "back to basics" with our setup, delve into the mystery of the "missing episode" and take a call from a very, very special guest: Mister. A.

S2 Ep25 - Don’t Truss It

Tue, 06 Sep 2022 21:15:02 +0100

In this episode, we talk about the recent political shift and how little it means, what the Substance Manifesto would contain and a little check in on our good friend Yeezy

S2 Ep26 LIVE - A Difficult One to Navigate

Fri, 09 Sep 2022 08:05:21 +0100

In this live episode, one of our most challenging to date, we try to keep the smiling alive at England's saddest hour.

S2 Ep27 - Blocky Games

Tue, 13 Sep 2022 19:00:00 +0100

In this episode, we talk about gaming nostalgia, how it isn't enough for one of our hosts and for the first time in our history we say: God Save The King.

S2 Ep28 LIVE - Brand New Czar

Fri, 16 Sep 2022 08:09:34 +0100

In this live episode, we test the limits of copyright infringement, come up with our own version of Substance for Days intro and give our thoughts on the current pilgrimage

S2 Ep29 LIVE - Snot Otter

Thu, 22 Sep 2022 20:43:43 +0100

In this live episode, one of our co-hosts dons the solo hat one more time to talk about a Pennsylvania treasure, The King's Robot and Lily the drunk driving dog.

S2 Ep30 - No Light In This Tunnel

Wed, 28 Sep 2022 20:59:51 +0100

In this episode, we take a look at the current state of the globe. Right wing, gas and the unemployed, we certainly get passionate!

S2 Ep31 LIVE - We Cracked It!

Sat, 01 Oct 2022 18:14:31 +0100

In this live episode, we finally after hours and hours and episodes and episodes we managed to fully engage our listeners with easy call-ins and spooky sound effects. Strap in folks, this one is a good'un

S2 Ep32 - People Watching

Wed, 05 Oct 2022 19:40:28 +0100

Who loves people watching? We do. You know what is just as good as people watching? People listening. Listening to people we mean. People listening to us is good too.

In this episode, we discover a day in the life of some of our fellow podcasters as we gate crash their parties.

S2 Ep33 LIVE - Drugs!

Sun, 09 Oct 2022 11:49:43 +0100

Did that title get your attention? In this live episode, we talk about some of the worlds most bizarre and dangerous drugs. We're not talking small fish here folks, we're talking Devils Breath, Krokodil, Mister A. All highly addictive.

S2 Ep34 LIVE - Caucasian Ghost Walks

Tue, 11 Oct 2022 20:13:02 +0100

The lead up to the Halloween special is picking up speed, with many of our listeners on the fence asking what on earth we think we're doing. Our answer is simple - we're hunting Substance.

S2 Ep35 - Space, the final podtear

Sat, 15 Oct 2022 16:42:23 +0100

Its not the final, that is merely a play on words. But in this episode, we cover somewhere infinite in its substance and something we've not spoken about before except for conspiracies. Thats right folks, space.

S2 Ep36 LIVE - Tik Tok Runs Amok

Tue, 18 Oct 2022 20:02:04 +0100

In this live episode, we kick off by talking through some of the most talented people getting dressed for Tik Tok follows, we have a few friends drop by and Just Stop Oil drop off.

S2 Ep37 LIVE - 100% Chris

Thu, 20 Oct 2022 20:08:41 +0100

You take 20% wit, 30% charm, 40% candour and 10% Wilson and you've got yourself an epic live podcast.

Halloween special next Friday 28th October!

S2 Ep38 - What Happened Nicole?

Wed, 26 Oct 2022 08:18:18 +0100

In this live episode, we meet a new friend who tells us all about a mysterious man, a cyber attack on a mobile phone and her opinion on their hometown. Some stories start from the middle.

S2 Ep39 Live - Halloween Special

Sun, 30 Oct 2022 19:57:30 +0000

Spooky goings on, the day has finally arrived. The SFD team head to the most haunted village in England to see if we can find ourselves some ghouls. Strap in ladies, gentlemen and non-binary, this is a fright night you won't soon forget...

S2 Ep40 Live - Shots Fired, Carlos

Sun, 30 Oct 2022 20:26:32 +0000

Super Sunday Podcast! In this surprise episode, we say a Sunday hello to some of our regulars down at the Bean, question one of our new listeners on their "bit" and assume our new identities as the Hero and the Cheeky Villain.

S2 Ep41 Live - Scat Mellish

Fri, 04 Nov 2022 20:22:33 +0000

In this live episode, we show our friends on the Pod how to really put on an urban dictionary show. And what a show it is.

S2 Ep42 Live - My Lobes Are Fried

Fri, 04 Nov 2022 20:24:17 +0000

Its a free for all! Our substance has grown to a full blown adult and now everyone has something to bring to its table. Our most collaborative episode to date.

S2 Ep43 LIVE - Aaron?!

Tue, 08 Nov 2022 20:36:26 +0000

In this live episode, we talk about a vivid dream, a deep cut and cockosaur. Oh and also... Aaron?!

S2 Ep44 LIVE - Intros for Days!

Fri, 11 Nov 2022 08:11:43 +0000

In this live episode, we run a special music intros podcast for our co-hosts and guests to guess.

S2 Ep45 LIVE - Tell Them That Its Human Nature

Wed, 16 Nov 2022 08:13:26 +0000

In this live episode, we talk to our fellow followers about the nature of humans to story top, to bring you down and how hyper sensitivity can help bring you above all the negativity. Oh yes, quite the topic.

S2 Ep46 LIVE - Food, Glorious Food

Thu, 17 Nov 2022 21:16:16 +0000

In this live podcast, we discuss some of the rare delicacies we would like try from around the world, a few places we'd like to visit and Blown in 60 Seconds.

S2 Ep47 LIVE - Hot Dog Wolverine

Tue, 22 Nov 2022 20:17:23 +0000

In this live episode, we ask our friends some hypothetical questions with rather entertaining and hilarious outcomes. As a special treat, we have a return of a familiar popular guest - a one Sir Paul McCartney.

S2 Ep48 LIVE - It’s Coming Home! (Probably)

Wed, 30 Nov 2022 09:52:28 +0000

In this live episode, whilst we watch the lions take on the dragons, we discuss a couple of usual suspects, a surprise visit from our producer and some classical music makes an appearance.

S2 Ep49 LIVE - Earth, Wind and Fire

Fri, 02 Dec 2022 07:52:51 +0000

In this episode, we kick back and let our friends take the lead on some hilarious alternative names for one of our fellow listeners.

S2 Ep50 LIVE - A Play

Fri, 09 Dec 2022 20:16:56 +0000

In this our 50th episode of season 2, we very quickly degenerate into a world of the bum. Brown town, population: you.

S2 Ep51 LIVE - Bushtucker Ballbag

Wed, 14 Dec 2022 08:32:45 +0000

In this live episode, we do our own version of the famous bushtucker trial. Mealworms, crickets and chilli chocolate. Yum.

S2 Ep52 LIVE - Slammers Are Coming

Fri, 16 Dec 2022 07:56:22 +0000

In this live episode, co-host Nick is feeling adventurous after a Bucks Fizz or three. We talk about a favourite beverages, recall our best time whilst riding the wave and set plans in place for a fun Thursday next week...

S2 Ep53 LIVE - We’re Back Baby

Fri, 30 Dec 2022 07:12:56 +0000

With '23 just around the corner, we bring the energy back to our listeners, fighting through the recent wave of covid and coughs to provide what we do best - Substance.

S2 Ep 54 Live - Happy New Year!

Wed, 04 Jan 2023 08:10:15 +0000

In this our first episode of 2023, we look back at last year and all the wonderful events, episodes and friends we've made along the way.

S2 Ep55 Live - Heaven Dreams

Fri, 06 Jan 2023 07:25:33 +0000

In this live episode we meet a new friend who has a very nice set of descriptives for our show and we tackle the some of the top 25 most controversial topics to ever be discussed.

S2 Ep56 LIVE - Whoreders

Wed, 11 Jan 2023 09:49:04 +0000

Cambridge defines a hoarder as someone who suffers from a mental condition that makes them want to keep a large number of things that are not needed or have no value. We define it as "how far do you take it before you throw away those pants". In this live episode, we talk about the art of hoarding and what we simply cannot bear to throw away.

S2 Ep57 LIVE - Is it People?

Mon, 16 Jan 2023 14:34:14 +0000

The debate rages on, in this live episode we continue the hot topic of gun control. Who wins? Society.

S2 Ep58 LIVE - Analtar

Tue, 24 Jan 2023 18:33:25 +0000

In this live episode, we revisit the idea of what it means to be offensive and nicely combine that with alternative names of films... if they were porn.

S2 Ep59 LIVE - Baskin Speaks The Truth

Tue, 24 Jan 2023 18:38:49 +0000

In this live episode, we slip into our comfy classics and flood our listeners with Substance, some would say enough for Days.

S2 Ep 60 LIVE - 40 Co-hosts for Days!

Thu, 26 Jan 2023 20:32:37 +0000

In this live episode, we celebrate an important milestone in our history - our upcoming Co-hosts 40th Birthday. Lots of laughs and lots of memories in this one - strap in folks!

S2 Ep 61 LIVE - Lovely Whittakers

Tue, 07 Feb 2023 20:22:36 +0000

In this LIVE episode, we have a chat about an interesting family over in the town of Odd, our new favourite gender-fluid artist and the return of an old feature - Paedo Talk!

S2 Ep62 LIVE - We’re Sorry Tyre

Tue, 07 Feb 2023 20:45:36 +0000

In this LIVE episode, we have a chat about how short songs are these days and a subject, though not one to be taken lightly, we feel we should address - Tyre Nichols.

S2 Ep63 LIVE - Wide Angle Lens

Fri, 10 Feb 2023 08:03:05 +0000

In this live episode, we have a quick run through of the activities surrounding the Grammy's. Some would suggest the whole event is a farce.. and we think we do, too.

S2 Ep64 LIVE - Would You Rather Part 2!

Fri, 17 Feb 2023 08:04:44 +0000

In this live episode, we take a look through some more would you rather style questions (Part 1 is on S2 Ep14!) and ask our audience some hard hitters. We also have a special guest in the form of our producer Samantha join us in the fun.

S2 Ep65 LIVE - One Whole Year!

Fri, 10 Mar 2023 08:05:42 +0000

Would you believe it listeners. As is the passing of time, so is the passing of substance. It's been one whole year since we've started this, going from simply talking to ourselves to a group of lovely people like yourself contributing such material as "seamen" (men of the sea).

S2 Ep66 LIVE - Herte Smerte

Mon, 20 Mar 2023 08:50:54 +0000

In this episode we focus on two main subjects - the tone of words and how one small change can make all the difference, and the biggest gamble our listeners and hosts have ever done. Funny? Of course.

S3 Ep1 LIVE - Suck My Tongue

Fri, 14 Apr 2023 08:07:40 +0100

We're back! Well.. we never left really. In this episode, we catch up on some of the most recent life events and don our tin foil hats in preparation for the end of the world.

S3 Ep2 LIVE - Dicks Out for Harambe, If You Know What I Mean

Fri, 21 Apr 2023 07:34:57 +0100

In this live episode, we are joined by a special guest - JDubz of The Listening Room podcast - who brings a new feature to the table that might possibly be one of our best yet. A Florida Man.

S3 Ep3 LIVE - You Work Hard Enough to Take Heroin, Doesn’t Mean You Should!

Fri, 28 Apr 2023 07:15:28 +0100

In this live episode, we go a little bit deeper than our normal casual setup. We talk about moving goalposts, living in the present and even God gets a mention. Our listeners keep us going. We started for us, we're staying for you.

S3 Ep4 LIVE - Happy Star Wars Day!

Fri, 05 May 2023 08:38:05 +0100

In this live episode, episode 4: a new hope, we cover a broad range of topics including god, meditation, Russia, nipples. Okay not nipples, but an orgasm pops up in there so well worth a listen.

S3 Ep5 LIVE - Its certainly something, I wouldn’t say weird though

Fri, 19 May 2023 08:19:06 +0100

In this live episode, we continue our latest golden bean feature, have a chat out our usual suspects (Yeezy and Musk) and take a different stand to the media on "glossing over" a royal getting killed. Again.

S3 Ep6 LIVE - A little bit nonce heavy

Thu, 01 Jun 2023 22:01:25 +0100

In this live episode, we rehash one of our tried and tested features, nonce news. Paedo weekly. Fiddler on the news. Oh and Scooter.

S3 Ep7 LIVE - Define Hate

Fri, 09 Jun 2023 07:46:32 +0100

In this live episode, we give you all the latest snapshot news on our newest nonce, Nick recreates the Apple WWDC conference main highlight, we give our Andrew Tate a mention and cower in fear to AI and the freedom of speech.

S3 Ep8 LIVE - Pig Intestine

Fri, 23 Jun 2023 15:58:39 +0100

In this live episode, we start off with some local news reviewing music and authentic chinese cuisine, then move swiftly but gently to the Oceangate crisis.

S3 Ep9 - Yeezy is Essentially a Terrorist

Fri, 30 Jun 2023 05:52:56 +0100

In this live episode, we talk about the wonderful world of online dating, Glastonbury and its lack lustre line-up, our regular Nonce News and of course... our man Ye.

S3 Ep10 - A Poultry Expedition

Fri, 07 Jul 2023 08:05:36 +0100

In this live episode, we wrap up on the Titan and the unfortunate, yet obvious preventative measures that may have avoided the demise of its crew. Speaking of rap, we also task ChatGPT with presenting a rap verse for us. The results are astounding...

S3 Ep11 LIVE - Hows that bum for you, alright?

Tue, 18 Jul 2023 07:28:26 +0100

In this live episode, we once again return to our regular feature "nonce news" as it seems these days it is almost a weekly occurrence. Mr Musk makes our headlines as well, with his alternative AI initiative and the biggest fight of the century...

S3 Ep12 LIVE - Pharmaceutical Robotics Technician

Fri, 28 Jul 2023 08:24:57 +0100

In this live episode, we pay our respects to the late Sinead O'Connor, get ourselves prepared for a new era of "Xeeing" and define for ourselves truly, what is a gnome?

S3 Ep13 LIVE - Unidentified Aerial Substance

Fri, 04 Aug 2023 08:26:18 +0100

So it turns out UFO's are a thing of the past, mere folklore. Unidentified Aerial Phenomenon is where its at and it turns out its so real, the government are having big talks about it. 2023 is here folks, its mental.

S3 Ep14 LIVE - Have I Been Pwned, Lizzo?

Fri, 18 Aug 2023 08:32:33 +0100

Once the frivolities are out of the way, we get down to the nitty gritty and try to ungrind our gears with both local and international substance. Stay tuned folks, we get angry.

S3 Ep 15 LIVE - Funny or not, this substance is Science

Sat, 09 Sep 2023 15:16:12 +0100

In this live episode, we review our fellow scientists take on comedy, and find out the funniest jokes ever told.. from a scientific perspective. Thats completely objective, driven by science only folks.

S3 Ep 16 LIVE - Alright Linda

Fri, 15 Sep 2023 10:59:19 +0100

In this live episode, following recent movements in Russia we decide to write a letter. In addition we have a new listener, Linda. She's lovely.

S3 Ep17 - One Heated Argument Away From Being Homeless

Fri, 29 Sep 2023 10:22:44 +0100

In this live episode, we surprise our listeners with a Wednesday show and have a chat about Mr. Brand being a naughty naughty boy.

S3 Ep18 LIVE - Bad Cakes, Bad Cops and Bad Horrors

Thu, 19 Oct 2023 18:45:27 +0100

In this live episode, we go straight for our classic format; local news, worldwide news and horror film reviews. Keefe D won't know what's hit him.

S3 EP 19 BONUS - Oh Dear Jada

Thu, 19 Oct 2023 18:51:52 +0100

In this BONUS episode, we pick up a brief chat on JPS' recent ridiculousness and discuss the practicality of widening corridors in hotels.

S3 Ep20 LIVE - Halloween Special - We got you Pomona

Wed, 01 Nov 2023 11:53:03 +0000

In this live episode, we tip our hats to the late great Mr Perry and talk a walk back in time to the dawn of All Hallows Eve. With some spooky ghost stories to follow, its sure to give our listeners a fright!

S3 Ep21 LIVE - Its all in the motors baby

Thu, 23 Nov 2023 19:49:19 +0000

In this live episode, co-hosts Paul and Nick discuss a shiny new vehicle bestowed upon them for a night, ask the listeners what their dream vehicle would be and Paul introduces Nick to a new world - of Yacht Rock.

S3 Ep22 LIVE - Its got our name on it, Substance

Thu, 23 Nov 2023 19:57:46 +0000

In this live episode, we discuss about angry scots, making a deal with God and launch our new Fan Club!

S3 Ep23 LIVE - Tink Tink Is Coming Out!

Thu, 14 Dec 2023 16:15:12 +0000

In this live episode, co-host Nick tells the story of how some key decisions resulted in him sleeping in an office, and we discuss our silly friend Oscar coming to the end of his punishment for a crime he definitely knew he was going to commit.

S3 Ep24 LIVE - The Wedding

Thu, 14 Dec 2023 16:17:30 +0000

In this live episode, we re-live the trauma of the night before the wedding, where Co-Host Nick is kidnapped. Yes folks, kidnapped.

S3 Ep25 LIVE - Parlour Games

Mon, 25 Dec 2023 19:01:31 +0000

In this live episode, with the run up to Christmas we give a fun parlour game a go, talk about Mr Kelly's misgivings and take a view on emissions in the capital city.

S3 Ep26 LIVE - A walk down Substance Lane

Mon, 25 Dec 2023 19:04:21 +0000

In this live episode, only days away from Christmas, we do a special quiz, where we try to figure out what an earth we've been talking about this year. Some great flashbacks.

S4 Ep1 LIVE - The Proposal

Wed, 10 Jan 2024 09:26:49 +0000

In this live episode, we bring in the new year with some great news. One of the hosts is getting married, there's another stag do to plan and the ring is finally getting exposed, possibly putting an end to Nonce News once and for all.

Although... something interrupts our podcast at the very end of the show..

S4 Ep 2 LIVE - Stag Stories for Days

Fri, 19 Jan 2024 14:40:21 +0000

In this live episode, we discuss how the smallest of technologies can control the biggest parts of our lives and travel the internet to find some inspiration for the upcoming stag do for our co host Paul.

S4 Ep3 LIVE - Window Licking Divs

Fri, 19 Jan 2024 14:42:15 +0000

In this live episode, we spend the majority of our time trying to wrangle the wild animals that form our listener base and also try to educate Co host Nick in the world of Hootie Nanny's.

S4 Ep4 LIVE - Substance, What is it Good For?

Thu, 01 Feb 2024 18:38:54 +0000

In this live episode, our circle of new music is complete, with JT complimenting our already perfect year. Oh also, turns out we're all going to be called up for war. Well except co-host Paul of course. He's past the age bracket.

Oh also, rumour has it we'll be driving iPhone's soon...

Hey, while you're hear, why not join our telegram!

https://t.me/substancefordays

S4 Ep5 LIVE - The Music Corner

Wed, 14 Feb 2024 15:34:04 +0000

In this live episode, it seems 2024 is the year for good music, as some of our favourite artists have thrown their hat into the ring and announced some upcoming albums, much to our delight. We also play a few rounds of guess the song title from some great lyrics...

S4 Ep6 LIVE - Roses Are Red, Substance is Blue

Thu, 22 Feb 2024 20:21:01 +0000

In this live episode, we trace back through history to find out the true origin of Valentine's Day. Turns out, it has nothing to do with Love. Or Flowers. Or Cards. We then round it off with some alternative poems to set the mood.

S4 Ep7 LIVE - Scratch and Sniff, The Best Man Cometh

Fri, 22 Mar 2024 20:04:01 +0000

In this LIVE episode, co-host Nick is presented with a mysterious envelope, and we mourn the passing of a great Manchild.. Rothchild.

S4 Ep8 LIVE - Take, Take, Take

Fri, 22 Mar 2024 20:07:50 +0000

In this LIVE episode, co-hosts Nick & Paul discuss the newly proposed budget, what it means for our fellow man and what it means for our fellow Etonians.

S4 Ep9 - Substance For Days Does Comic Relief - 2!

Fri, 22 Mar 2024 20:10:56 +0000

We're back with a vengeance baby! With a pocket full of dreams and a bag full of jokes, co-hosts Nick & Paul present the second installment of Comic Relief. Will we hit our target? Listen to find out!

S4 Ep10 LIVE - All Aboard The S.S. Substance

Thu, 04 Apr 2024 15:08:05 +0100

In this live episode, in possibly our longest feature yet, we discuss the latest news surrounding an important question - Diddly Do It?

S4 Ep11 LIVE - Las Tortillas

Fri, 19 Apr 2024 20:45:14 +0100

In this live episode, we kick straight in with a food race, we quoth a new listener (nevermore) and give our views on the upcoming battle of the Titan.. versus a youtuber.

S4 Ep12 LIVE - WWSE - World Wrestling Substance Entertainment

Fri, 19 Apr 2024 20:49:45 +0100

In this live episode, after a brief clarification on where we stand regarding what is out of bounds for comedy, we discuss some diddling and reminisce in the good ol' days of the wrestling eras following the exchange of world title's at the greatest show on earth. Can you smell, what Substance is cookin'?

S4 Ep13 LIVE - Agendas for Days

Tue, 21 May 2024 08:26:27 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we discuss the itinerary for the upcoming Stag Do. There will be fun, oh yes, there will be fun.

S5 Ep1 LIVE - Substance for Days on Youtube!

Tue, 21 May 2024 08:28:54 +0100

In this our first LIVE episode of season 5, we take our listeners on a new journey, from Audio to Video, as we embark on content creation for the YouTube universe.

S5 Ep2 LIVE - Robin Thick for Days

Tue, 21 May 2024 09:14:49 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we discuss the success of our first Video episode, the ups and downs, the trials and tribulations of "the clap".

S5 Ep3 LIVE - The Chicken Wing Story

Tue, 21 May 2024 09:23:42 +0100

In this live episode, co-host Nick takes us through his daring feat at taking on the second hottest chicken wings in the world. Spoiler, it doesn't end well.

S5 Ep4 LIVE - How Rude of Us, Adrenochrome Anyone?

Thu, 06 Jun 2024 19:22:04 +0100

In this live episode, we talk through the highs and lows of horse racing and discuss an old myth surrounding taking the blood from innocent children for fame and glory.

S5 Ep5 LIVE - Nonce News Returns!

Thu, 06 Jun 2024 19:29:33 +0100

In this live episode, we talk about what happens when you take The Wrong Turn and the latest in nonce news, namely the Schneider scandal.

S5 Ep6 LIVE - Ruby The Alien

Fri, 28 Jun 2024 21:28:06 +0100

In this live episode, we talk about the new arrival to the wider family, the amount of investment made into proving the existence of Aliens, and The Acolyte.

S5 Ep7 LIVE - Tik Tok, its the Alternator!

Thu, 04 Jul 2024 15:23:03 +0100

In this live episode, co-host Paul tells all, lays bare the joys of a vehicle mishap and co-host Nick joins Tik Tok.

S5 Ep8 LIVE - Election Special!

Thu, 11 Jul 2024 10:57:21 +0100

Its election day folks! Who goes? YOU Decide...

S5 Ep9 LIVE - Is It Coming Home?

Tue, 23 Jul 2024 14:53:06 +0100

In this LIVE episode, the final showdown is upon us. Will England bring home the victory after 58 years of consistent failure?

S5 Ep10 LIVE - Sparkling Experience

Wed, 07 Aug 2024 15:19:49 +0100

In this LIVE episode, the mystery of Jay Slater is solved and our hosts take a small dive into the Death of Slim Shady.

S5 Ep11 LIVE - Picnic Bench

Wed, 07 Aug 2024 15:57:31 +0100

In this LIVE episode, an epiphany and a celebration. Co-host Nick arrives at the startling conclusion of the worlds intelligence and Co-host Paul has an announcement to make about Producer Sam.

S5 Ep12 LIVE - Insect Jealousy

Thu, 22 Aug 2024 11:17:20 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we recap on the swift arm of the law in the face of the UK riots, and the swift arm of the Olympic shooter.

S5 Ep13 LIVE - Professional Ballbag

Thu, 22 Aug 2024 11:31:34 +0100

In this LIVE episode, we hop around and wax lyrical with many different substances, landing firmly on post apocalyptic podbean and how the world will recover.

S5 Ep14 LIVE - Morning Achiever

Thu, 26 Sep 2024 11:31:31 +0100

With growing concerns over the fate of Papa D, what do our co-hosts think of the latest in a long standing series of nonce news?

S5 Ep15 LIVE - A Beautiful Soul, No one knows it

Thu, 26 Sep 2024 11:33:42 +0100

If the co-hosts have got a door, they are going to close it. Not the co-hosts, "they". Who are they, you ask? Listen to the show and find out for yourselves!

S5 EP16 LIVE - Stagatha Crispy

Thu, 26 Sep 2024 11:35:03 +0100

Oh it's nearly here, the time is upon us where we put all our differences aside and go lose ourselves for the weekend. We can't wait.

S5 EP17 LIVE - Truffle Pig

Thu, 26 Sep 2024 11:37:31 +0100

New ideas, new skills, new nicknames. In this live episode, our co-hosts talk the listeners through their first time holding a deadly weapon in their hands and the art of sniffing out food no matter where it lies.

S5 EP18 LIVE - Clammy Otter

Fri, 18 Oct 2024 15:56:15 +0100

The time is drawing near folks, the chaos is upon us. Who will be the agent of destruction? Why, P Diddler of course...

S5 EP19 LIVE - Ding Dong

Fri, 18 Oct 2024 15:57:58 +0100

He's getting married in the morning, Ding Dong the bells are gonna chime... In this live episode, we prepare for the greatest matrimony in history; Co-host Paul and Producer Sam.

Also, we thank Beyonce Knowles.

S5 EP21 LIVE - Sea Unicorns

Thu, 28 Nov 2024 15:30:20 +0000

So it turns out aliens live amongst us, in the ocean. Our two co-hosts, along with the rest of the world, somehow don't seem to be that phased considering everything else going on in 2024.

S5 EP22 LIVE - Bungle's Twanger

Thu, 13 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

Shout out to Nifty Steel for the title of this episode. As for the content? Who knows.

S5 EP23 LIVE - Merry Substance

Fri, 14 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

With only 13 days before the big man slides down the chimney, that can only mean two things. Egg nog, and Substance.

S5 EP24 LIVE - Pickled Egg

Sat, 15 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

Less than one week! Surely the team are in the full Christmas spirit?

S5 EP25 LIVE - Twenty Twenty Five

Sun, 16 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

Its 2025, its Episode 25, of Season 5, what else either has 25 or rhymes with 5?

Hives.

S5 EP26 LIVE - Espresso Kitten

Tue, 18 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

In this episode, co-host Nick discusses Short n Sweet, an album he has been playing on repeat non stop since the turn of 2025.

S5 EP27 LIVE - Benton Borskewitz

Wed, 19 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

What a name, and what an episode!

S5 EP28 LIVE - Executive Substance

Thu, 20 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

Oh wow, he's in! And he's already taking ass and kicking names!

S5 EP29 LIVE - Gentle Vinegar

Fri, 21 Feb 2025 12:00:00 +0000

Oh now we're cooking on gas!

S5 EP30 LIVE - Cowboy's Like Us

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 10:01:32 +0100

We must, before we start, thank our queen for giving us her blessing to release this episode. You know who you are.

S5 EP31 LIVE - Say Drake

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 10:04:18 +0100

We hear you like Substance. The beef hit a fever pitch this week, culminating in one crazy super bowl performance. Lets talk about it.

S5 EP32 LIVE - Book Gizzard

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 10:06:54 +0100

Who wouldn't want a book gizzard? We wouldn't, thats who. More local and world news from our favourite places in the world. Mainly America.

S5 EP33 LIVE - My Neck, My Back

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 10:13:36 +0100

We're back after a bit of a break and when we say we're back, what we mean is... our backs hurt.

S5 EP34 LIVE - Jennifer Moretty

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 10:20:54 +0100

In local news, an end of an era for one of our hosts here. In world news, its all a bit mental, and its going to get worse by the looks of it.

S5 EP35 LIVE - Lemon Zesty

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 10:26:06 +0100

We told you it would get worse. Yeezy's made the headlines again, China is pulling the gloves off and some princesses have gone into space. Its all a bit stressed depressed lemon zest.

S5 EP36 LIVE - Nugget Brain

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:16:28 +0100

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S5 EP37 LIVE - Bring It On

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:17:33 +0100

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S5 EP38 LIVE - He Didn’t

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:18:23 +0100

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S5 EP39 LIVE - Ms Cudi

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:19:49 +0100

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S5 EP40 LIVE - Jane Pipe

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:20:33 +0100

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S5 EP41 LIVE - No, Will

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:21:21 +0100

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S5 EP42 LIVE - 2 Out Of 5

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:22:40 +0100

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S5 EP43 LIVE - Hot Stuff

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 11:23:55 +0100

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S5 EP44 LIVE - Penny Tooth

Sat, 09 Aug 2025 09:55:58 +0100

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S5 EP45 LIVE - All Aboard

Sat, 09 Aug 2025 09:58:37 +0100

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S5 EP46 LIVE - 36 Years Later: New Glasses, Shouty Jokes and a Surprise Tetris

Sat, 04 Apr 2026 22:44:38 +0100

Hey — pull up a chair. This episode is basically us catching up after a couple of weeks off: audio tests, a lot of friendly shouting, Mama Bear check‑ins, and someone finally rocking spectacles for the first time in 36 years (yes, we made fun of him). We riff about Specsavers, a mysteriously non‑free eye test, and the sad heroism of one overworked left eye learning to take breaks.

We wander into work life and real talk — hod‑carrying, the grind of PAYE vs self‑employed, and the stubborn decision to not knock yourself into the ground for pennies. You’ll hear the practical worries, the jokes about skipping leg day, and the quiet determination to walk away when it isn’t worth it.

Then we go full tech nerd: a live demo with ChatGPT building a playable Tetris in your browser from a single prompt. It’s the simplest, freakiest demo of how fast AI can turn ideas into working code — and we talk about what that means for jobs, creativity, and whether you should be slightly terrified or secretly excited.

Of course we detour into the usual chaos: Trump takes, Epstein files, Ghislaine Maxwell moves, interstellar objects getting labeled comets, and the creeping suspicion that some official stories are worthy of at least a raised eyebrow. There’s banter about billionaires, aliens, the matrix‑style theories, and why sometimes it’s healthier to play Clash Royale instead of doomscrolling.

It’s messy, funny, and surprisingly tender — old podcast clips making us laugh, shouty moments, friends popping in the chat, and the little wins (like being able to actually see people again). If you want casual late‑night convo about life, tech, conspiracies, and the small humiliations of getting older, this one’s for you.

S5 EP47 LIVE - Flags, Final Bosses & Suck Balls Economics

Mon, 20 Apr 2026 09:20:23 +0100

This week, we start with supermarket rage and somehow end up on culture wars, religion, influencer nonsense, Pebble Johnson, and whether civilisation is actively falling apart.

We talk flags, Facebook arguments, viral “final boss” weirdos, capitalism doing capitalism, Netflix distractions, and why arguing online is always pointless but never optional. Equal parts cynical, chaotic, and funny — just two brothers trying to make sense of an increasingly absurd internet‑driven world.