Now Fear This! the podcast with Becky & Merie

If you’re interested in teenagers, go get some therapy! Halloween Urban Legends vs. Real-life Murders

Thu, 06 Oct 2022 19:22:39 -0700

This week’s podcast episode celebrates the start of Halloween season, with Becky and Merie diving into the Hook Man urban legend’s origin story, which may date back to the still-unsolved Texas-based Phantom Killer. Along the way, your hosts address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Which mental institution do YOU want to tour for a college field trip? Is a pre-Facebook advice column responsible for putting an end to lovers’ lanes and its associated “necking?” Which “Dawson’s Creek” dreamboat is Becky’s boyfriend in this episode? (Hint: It’s not Dawson!) Is Thor responsible for brutally killing a couple of orderlies in a 1920’s Iowa farm town?

Come for Merie yelling the phrase, “YOU F**KING FLEE!” before Becky can even say the F word once. Stay to find out which recent Netflix movie is an unintentional horror show. Also: Did YOU pick the wrong night to pick on Stanley?!

If you’re murdered by the cable guy, will THAT get you out of your final bill?

Thu, 22 Sep 2022 19:46:34 -0700

This week’s podcast episode delves into Death by Cable Guy, featuring the lovely Texas grandma Betty Thomas murdered by Roy James Holden, Jr., who headed to WalMart with her credit cards and without changing from his murder clothes. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Can you cut the weight line out & cover the whirl? (Neither can Becky. Or Merie’s hairdresser.) What new TV show is so bad Becky is considering filing charges against its creators? How many of you want to hack us and find all the photos of…tooth abscesses and sleeping cats? Who amongst us deserves to be punched in the dick? Depends: Are YOU the guy running a site with illegally obtained porn? Is that a demon on Merie’s shoulder or are you just a wacko massage therapist “feeling” negative energy in her shoulder?

Come for Merie’s inability to have herself at “hello. Stay for the cuteness overload of 2 cats meeting.

Sources for this episode include: lawandcrime.com. New York Post. NBC news. dailymail.com and Dallas Observer. USA TODAY.

Just a bit of everyday sadism: Deadly wars waged with neighbors

Fri, 09 Sep 2022 09:52:29 -0700

This week’s podcast episode involves fencing-induced violence (and not the kind that gets you an Olympic medal, more like prison time) as neighborly disputes turn horrifying and murderous. Along the way, your hosts address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

How does a meal of liver & onions lead to Becky questioning Merie’s moral compass? What do you get the psychopath in your life? Try our Psychopath Gift Basket of jalapeños, black coffee, and bitter chocolates! Why is Becky threatening to give y’all an unprovoked (but sure-to-be-super-sexy) grammar lesson? How good is your Apple TV’s Black Bird serial killer voice? (Not as good as Merie’s!!! 😝)

Come for the discussion of the tragic Schloegl family massacre. Stay for Long Beach racist Lorene Mae Lake’s relentless campaign to become the worst person in the world. (Also, get off that motorcycle!)

Advice for avoiding litigation, threats, and death can be found here.

”Somebody get the Bras of Life!” Grown men vanishing into the woods

Fri, 26 Aug 2022 09:39:06 -0700

This week, your podcast hosts are fearing for grown adult men, Terrence Woods and Lars Mittank, who both vanished without a trace in broad daylight and in front of witnesses, never to be seen again. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Is the doctor’s clinic in Bulgaria next to the Cinnabon or the Chilis 2? How much will Mark Cuban invest in our Shark Tank pitch that involves pixelated body parts? What could cause one of your pod-coasts to utter the words, “As a human being I cannot bless you!?” (Same for “sit down, little man?”) Do YOU answer the call of the void? …and is that before or after you find yourself in bar fights arguing over soccer & Star Wars? Anyone want to shop at our new boutique, Elements & Elephants? (us, either!) Come for Merie’s anti-climactic “f*ck you” to her boss. Stay for Becky’s horrible German accent that should get her arrested in Frankfurt even more so than that unfortunate international airport incident back in 2019. 😬

(Also, you better acknowledge that sneeze.)

Sources for this episode include Talk Murder with me . Strange Outdoors. Forbes. All That’s Interesting. Vanished.us.

That time Tina took down Burt the Turtle: A small town haunted by murder & a 20-year miscarriage of justice

Fri, 12 Aug 2022 08:42:21 -0700

This week’s podcast episode has your hosts attempting to piece together the long and winding tale of the 1985 murder of Helen Wilson and its resulting trials, as featured in the doc series on HBO Mind Over Murder. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

How could Becky & Merie forget the name of the badass woman who got this nightmare all figured out? (BTW, it’s Special Investigator Tina Vath, thus the title of this ep!) Ya wanna see a tutorial on how to have sex in a video store? How for the loveofbabyjesusinamager can some nonexistent dirty dishes lead directly to 6 murder convictions? Is Merie a Vulcan or an elf? What phenomenon is deadly to humans but creates...giant radishes? What exactly IS a cognitive dissonance-a-palooza (and how can anyone possibly know that)? Can YOU hear Becky nodding? Come for your pod-coasts unscientific analysis of caves & volcanoes. Stay for Becky’s simple solution for living a calmer, more peaceful life.

In which Merie overhears a murder plot & Becky WILL rat you out: The death of Kendra Hatcher, Part 2

Fri, 29 Jul 2022 14:05:20 -0700

Welcome back to the Now Fear This podcast’s coverage of the awful murder of Dallas dentist Dr. Kendra Hatcher, with discussion of the police investigation and the ensuing trials. Along the way, your hosts address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Does drinking and taking Ambien turn you into a murder-plotting psycho? Did Becky pick the wrong week to quit huffing paint? Don’t you hate it when your car shows up on the news as a murder scene getaway vehicle? Do you use a dry erase board with $ signs on it to plan your murders just so the police will fully know your plot when they raid your house? (No? Just Becky, then? Okay.) How are Merie’s immunosuppressant drugs related to her decision to go on the lam following a murder spree? Do YOU want to choose who Becky kills on national TV in order to fulfill her Barkley list? (Email her at fearless@nowfear.com!) Why is Merie threatening Becky with turning around and showing Becky her flannel shirt collection? 🙀 Did Becky’s cat really try & kill her & make it look like a suicide?

Come for Becky’s voice turning into the Wicked Witch of the West around minute 27. Stay to the very end for little preview of an upcoming Now Fear This! episode about an HBO murder documentary.

Sources for this episode include Daily Mail. Texas Monthly. Dallas Observer.

Broken bottles & hunks of cheese: The cruel & callous murder of Kendra Hatcher

Fri, 15 Jul 2022 10:07:04 -0700

This week’s podcast episode has Merie & Becky discussing the murder-for-hire of beloved children’s dentist Kendra Hatcher, which occurred in Becky’s neighborhood in 2015. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

How does a tandem bike lead directly to divorce in a parking lot in Napa? How is breast cup size related to whether or not you could…stroke out? How many of us call 911 when we can’t get the wifi to work? (No? Just Becky? 🤷‍♀️) Death by fitted sheet…or sports bra? Your choice. What sperm-based true-crime documentary makes Becky “sangry?” (And can y’all just keep your sperm inside your bodies until…invited? Thanks!) Who amongst us is capable of negotiating like a man for a murder-for-hire position?

Come for Merie’s workout-related near-death experience. Stay for your pod-coasts' offensive list of “troubley” names (And forgive Becky, okay? Her name is BECKY!)

Also, hey, Brenda: MOVE ON.

Sources for this episode include Daily Mail. Texas Monthly. Dallas Observer. And go to Southern Decadence weekend in New Orleans. Go.

Welcome to the Narcissism Subdivision! Death by selfie & murderous selfie takers

Thu, 30 Jun 2022 09:53:04 -0700

This week’s podcast dives into the curious case of “The Selfie Murderer” Amanda Taylor, and other various and sundry selfie-related deaths. Along the way, your hosts address the burning questions you didn’t even know you had, like:.

Is that an alien egg or a green vagina? Who amongst us isn’t too crazy for ISIS? What behavior does Merie engage in that totally wigs out a Disney dolphin trainer? Can you forgive Becky for being super bummed about all the mass shootings? Thank you. (Also, she’s sorry for being really cleavage-y. It’s not her fault.) How come the “Wild West” had strict gun regulation back then, yet we can’t pull our shit together today? Why is Merie threatening to take Becky to a museum specifically designed for Becky’s waking nightmare (aka, selfies)? Can you leave the quote mark hanging? (Not if Merie has anything to say about it!) Come for the cross-heavy decor. Stay for Becky’s official Senate campaign slogan (against the universally loathed Ted Cruz 🤮) coined by her future campaign manager Merie. Trust me: it’s a good one.

Follow Influencers in the Wild. Do it now.

Skidmore, Missouri, Part 2: Fifty Shades of Armie Hammer

Sat, 18 Jun 2022 13:15:02 -0700

Part 2 of the podcast’s exploration of the tiny town of Skidmore, MO has your pod-coasts traveling along the dusty trail of a gruesome murder and more than one potential kidnapping, taking a detour through Texas and the Ozarks, yet somehow ending up back in Missouri. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t even know you had, like:

Is Skidmore really just this nice little community of people who are sitting ducks for out-of-town Chester the Molesters, murderers, and baby snatchers? Is Aaron Rodgers actually the pitcher for a Major League Baseball club (and how could anyone possibly know that!)? Does Becky really offer her ear to Merie as a birthday gift? What are the odds of Merie dreaming about cats nursing orphaned baby squirrels? (Pretty good!) What are the odds of you catching Becky watching a “body horror” movie? (Slim to none!) What are the odds of you finding Merie having sex behind a Dumpster (Less than zero - who has that kind of quad strength?!) What is the thing Merie reveals about herself that horrifies Becky so much she wishes to turn back time to before she heard it?

Come for the cuss-shaming. Stay for the machete-wielding phone avenger.

Skidmore, Missouri, Part 1: Are you sure this isn’t about Madison Cawthorn?

Sat, 04 Jun 2022 11:36:02 -0700

This week’s podcast episode has Merie & Becky metaphorically heading into the tiny town of Skidmore, MO, and the murders, assaults, unsolved crimes, and odd disappearances that have happened there. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

IS it the year of penises on television? (And what other penises are there?!) Is “Skidmore” a new CW show where there's hot people casting spells and doing crimes? (We hope so!🤞🏻) Is Becky in fact looking at Merie while touching her boobs? (Maybe!) Would Becky rather murder her husband than have insomnia? (Only sometimes!) Can we stop giving people the middle name Wayne? (‘Cause it’s guaranteed serial killer material!) What unknown “California drug” makes you shave all your pubic hair? Come for the Mr. & Mrs. Punkin contest. Stay for the turkey baster-based breast implants Becky is threatening to inflict on Merie.

(Also, That’s some Grade A nerd shit right there.)

Sources for this episode include:

Medium.com. Talk Murder with Me. Oxygen.com Rolling Stone. A book called Baby be Mine by Diane Fanning. https://allthatsinteresting.com/branson-perry

“This M&M is the happening place, right?” Jessica Chambers & the crime story that never ends

Fri, 20 May 2022 09:07:57 -0700

This week’s continuation of season 2 of the podcast has Merie & Becky heading down the long, terrifying, and confusing crime story of the murder of Jessica Chambers. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

How does Merie start a turf war with Mississippi gangs over copyright infringement? Do you want to apply to her super-exclusive wine club, the Sip Mob? Remember when your pod-coasts used to be good at, you know, podcasting? (Us, either!) Should you learn how to surf after the age of…40? (Hint: NO!!!) Did Becky go to Cambridge or not (and how could anyone possibly know that?)?! Can you be in a small town in Mississippi and NOT be in a drug gang? (Probably not!) Would Becky convict you for murdering someone because of pimento cheese? (Never! 🤮) Should you kidnap Merie for her ATM’s PIN? (Only if you don’t want it!) What pairs well with baloney sandwiches, Entenmanns, and Chee-toes? (Maybe a nice Chablis?)

Come for the book called How my Podcast ruined my Marriage and my Life. Stay for Merie’s description of how she’s going to die at the hands of…Bob.

Sources for this episode include: Oxygen. People. ID Crimefeed. Clarion Ledger.

Eat a cheese sandwich, get murdered by a librarian? Violent squatters & death by U-Haul renter

Fri, 06 May 2022 00:14:18 -0700

WE’RE BAAAAACK!!!! This week’s podcast episode has Merie & Becky attempting to take on the terrifying phenomenon known as house squatting (and not the potty-related kind - eww) and a Netflix show called “Worst Roommate Ever.” Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Is “Bye Karen” the new “Bye Felicia?” 🤞🏻What fear-inducing activity is Merie doing with her husband’s phone while he’s asleep at night? DOES Merie need to see the tooth that’s all rotted out in the back of your head? Do YOU want to see Merie’s weird cat fetish stuff? (Neither does Becky!) Does Becky judge you when she peers in your windows while you’re having sex? (You’ll never know!) Can Merie…count? (Depends: Are Becky’s f-bombs in this episode numbered at 0 or 25?!?) Does Merie have stories of squatters and even strangers living in her mom’s attic? (Of course she does!)

Come for the U-Haul inflicted PTSD. Stay to witness Merie becoming her mother.

Also, you’re not taking Becky’s fucking cat.

Sources include: New Yorker. D Magazine. Listverse. AppleNews.

12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #15: Sappy, Crappy Movies

Thu, 16 Dec 2021 08:02:04 -0700

For this year’s continuation of the 12 Fears of Christmas, join Becky & Merie as they discuss terrifying holiday shopping, sappy Hallmark movies, and some creeeeeeepy Christmastime disappearances. Along the way, they spread unconfirmed disinformation about Walmart and modern slavery. Also:

What’s all this about the violence in an invented county called Clarecork in Ireland? How long do those Forever 21 dresses last before they disintegrate? Long enough for you to snag yourself a prince from Malvadeniastan? Want to join Merie in all her watching of German torture porn? How ‘bout the scary violent guy who turns out to be prince AND saves the town square? Why not Christmas at Six Flags? Becky apologizes for the horrible French accents attempted by your pod-coasts. So…grab your pepper spray and let’s go shopping!

12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #14: Christmas Disappearances

Thu, 16 Dec 2021 08:00:55 -0700

12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #13: Holiday Shopping

Thu, 16 Dec 2021 08:00:00 -0700

Bonus! A “Love, Actually” takedown, Director’s Cut

Sat, 27 Nov 2021 10:46:17 -0700

Once upon a time, a girl named Becky watched a movie named “Love, Actually.” While most people react to said film with smiles and even reverence, Becky reacted with sadness ☹️, nausea 🤮, and even anger 🤬.

One year ago, Merie and Becky sat down to talk about this film as a part of their “12 Fears of Christmas.” The full episode had to be edited down to 15 minutes, thus inducing more ☹️, 🤮, and 🤬 in Becky, who really wants you to understand the horror show that is this movie, and experience her rage in all its 30-minute “bipedal vagina” glory (agony?). She really, REALLY hates this movie.

Your pod-coasts also offer the same unedited treatment for the episode with Merie’s attempts to diagnose Becky’s Love, Actually Psychological Condition. Find it on the BONUS page when you subscribe↑↑↑!

So, here it is! Becky & Merie’s 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear 4: “Love, Actually” (Director’s Cut). Enjoy!

Follow @thelindywest. Do it now.

He looks like the sheriff‘s deputy from Porky‘s! A literal Thanksgiving family horror show

Fri, 19 Nov 2021 08:22:56 -0700

This week’s Thanksgiving podcast episode has Merie and Becky examining nutso-deluxo cases of holiday meal-based family murders, featuring murderer Joel Guy, Jr. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: Do YOU have a safety advisor around when you financially cut off your grown-assed adult human male child? (Perhaps you should. Especially if he looks like this guy ↓)

Does YOUR murder checklist always include Walmart? (Of course it does. Especially if it is written in this handwriting ↓)

Do you write letters to the authorities to prevent yourself from gouging out your roommate’s eyes? Will Merie pick YOU up from your surgery? (Hint: no.) Does the devil cause Becky’s prayer-based collapsing pillow debacle?

Come for the can-shaped cranberries. Stay for Becky’s how-to-NOT-murder-your-parents-to-do list. Also, why is Becky fearing Merie’s penis hat? (See below & be terrified ↓. Very terrified.)

Don’t bring a gun to the milk crate challenge! Memes, imitation, and death from internet idiocy

Fri, 12 Nov 2021 13:00:06 -0700

This week’s podcast episode has Merie & Becky attempting to take on the latest internet challenge: Slap a teacher! No, not really. But they do give the NFT! treatment to silly and dangerous memes & challenges, like the gas tank drug-based car explosion murders and that whole milk crate debacle. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

What did YOU do when we lost gravity last May 22? Float? Us, either. If you have your fentanyl, do YOU use the fentanyl or randomly waste it by rubbing it on painter’s tape and scaring suburbanites? Isn’t it bad enough that Sharon Stone goes around being all heterosexual, but why does she have to throw it in our faces?! Is Merie legally obligated to point out Becky’s abnormally tall height in every 4th or 5th episode? How does a criminal gang in Texas lead to Becky breaking into a song from West Side Story? (Yes. She’s sorry about that.) Were YOU in the audience when Merie knocked herself out trying to get her yellow belt in TaeKwonDo? And did you laugh or cheer? How did Merie’s loud-assed voice effectively send her entire company into a meltdown for a day? Come for the “Ambiguously Gay Duo” Saturday Night Live superhero reference. Stay for the supervillain Stemen the Semen Injector.

Hernia surgery would have been better! Criminal twins and Hollywood’s malignant “Malignant”

Thu, 04 Nov 2021 10:23:36 -0700

Join Becky & Merie in this podcast episode, where they do not hold back on their scathing review of the god-awful horror show of a horror “movie” Malignant. They do, however, use said “movie” as a springboard for discussing crime as it relates to various & sundry twins and identities, parasitic or otherwise...so, there’s that. Along the way, believe it or not, your hosts also address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

How come abandoned mental asylums are accessible only at night and during a rainstorm? Just how little did Becky pay attention to the “plot” of this episode’s spotlight movie? (Hint: verrrry little. Hey, YOU try watching it! No, wait, don’t.) Who is the poor man’s Bryce Dallas Howard and is that a…compliment? Just how inaccurate can your two pod-coasts be when talking about gender identity and dysmorphia? (And will you please forgive them…they’re trying!?) Would YOU watch a movie about Jim Henson’s nightmare twin muppets? Are space aliens responsible for a group of terrible crimes in a French resort town?

Come for Merie’s explanation of how twins are formed. Stay for Becky’s threat of horror-jazz ASMR.

Also, have YOU seen those abs?! (Us, either. Show us!)

Sources for this episode include: Merie’s ass. BBC. ABC News. Read about the murders of Yolanda Sapp, Kathleen Brisbois, and Nickie Lowe here.

BONUS Episode! A Halloween spooky story mini scare-fest

Sat, 30 Oct 2021 08:44:25 -0700

Welcome to the bonus podcast episode for Halloween 2021, featuring Becky and a lil bit of spooky storytelling.

Tune in for some ghosts 👻, a coupla stalkers & creepers 🔪, and more than one haunted house 😱.

If you like ‘em, let your pod-coasts know & maybe they can do more of this in the future!

These are from the “interwebs” AND include a couple of tales authored by Becky herself. The majority of these stories appear on multiple sites, where an author could not be found. Sites include: https://thoughtcatalog.com https://shortscarystories.tumblr.com. pinterest. reddit.

“Serial killers ruin everything!” Crime and corpse-based Halloween decor

Thu, 28 Oct 2021 17:29:43 -0700

***Listen to the very end for a preview of Becky’s creepy ghost stories!!!***

This podcast episode has your hosts discussing dead bodies on porches, in trees, and hanging from roofs…some real, some not, but all in the name of Halloween. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: Will Becky honor a gruesomely murdered Merie with bloody handprints on her glass door? Which one of your hosts is now branded an #entertainmentkaren? Which TV show requires Merie to insert…a catheter? What are your career prospects if your surname is Mother**ker-Asshole?…Perhaps an auto-body painter in Waco, Texas? Come for the slow-moving zombies. Stay for the decapitated head Pez dispenser.

One of these years I’ll be a sexy cockroach: Texas’s notorious “Candyman” Halloween murderer

Thu, 21 Oct 2021 19:36:44 -0700

This week’s podcast episode finds your hosts investigating the history of fear of Halloween trick or treat poisonings, which all began with a Pixie Stick and an EVIL, evil father. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Why does Becky have to womansplain Beckysplaining to Merie? Wanna be a sexy poop emoji 💩 for Halloween? Is there any costume that sounds better than a sexy giant cheese wedge?! 🧀 Is that strychnine or is it cornstarch? 🤷‍♀️ How come Becky & Merie are not gonna kill kids with fruits and vegetables? 🍅 What leads Becky to utter the phrase, “We’re all busy tampons?” Come for the inaccurate descriptions of various household poisons. ☠️ Stay for Merie’s murder plot check list. 🔪 Watch the Cropsey documentary. And keep the lights on.

Sources for this episode include: Oxygen. Listverse. SF Gate. Snopes.

Further sources can be found here:
https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/six-banned-candies-you-wont-be-getting-on-halloween

https://thoughtcatalog.com/jim-goad/2014/10/13-brutal-halloween-murders-nsfw/

Does being magnetic make us X-Men? Overcoming the freakout-fueling COVID Disinformation Dozen

Thu, 14 Oct 2021 19:45:49 -0700

This week’s podcast episode finds Becky & Merie probing the fallout from the COVID Disinformation Dozen and the resulting public freakouts. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Did a certain singer's cousin’s balls ever recover from swelling up the size of Alpha Centauri? How are surgical masks connected to child sex trafficking? (No, seriously. HOW?) Bill Gates is kind of an a**hole, but did he plan this?

Don’t you love it when there’s a big global conspiracy plan for global domination out there? (Neither does Becky.) Do you want to attend the New Delhi cow urine drinking party? How about camel urine? (Us, either.) What spoon-based science experiment may trigger you if you’re into ASMR? What happiness-based science cult is Merie threatening to embed herself in as a comedy journalist? Why is a woman who is not having anal sex responsible for…banning books in Texas? Is there video proof of a televangelist summoning the wind of God? Come for “the sexiest conversation we’ve ever had on this show.” Stay for the…violet-dipped anal swabs? 🤷‍♀️

Follow Patton Oswald. NOW.

Sources for this episode include: MSNBC’s Brian William with the mic drop.

And you can see the Texas mom anal sex freakout here: https://www.tmz.com/2021/09/19/texas-mother-austin-school-board-meeting-anal-sex-book/

Walter’s purr will be the last thing you ever hear! Pam Hupp’s greed-induced graduation to serial killer

Thu, 07 Oct 2021 15:04:13 -0700

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky & Merie take on the bizarre & murderous crime spree of Missouri’s Pam Hupp, who murdered at least two people in cold blood…that we know of.

Along the way, your hosts address the burning questions you didn't know you had, like:

Body horror: genius or genuinely f**king awful? Is there such a thing as "sexually sedentary?" What in the hell causes one of your pod-coasts to utter the phrase, “You don’t want to see a woman get raped by a car?” Was the Academy Award-winning Korean film “Parasite” actually, sneakily, done in Mandarin Chinese? (According to super-smart Amazon “reviewers,” yes.) Do YOU re-enact 911 calls as a hobby or pretend to be a Dateline NBC producer to lure people to your home? (Well…maybe you’ll stop after this show.) What is Merie’s cat-based murder plot? Come for Merie’s British zombie doctor monologuing that gets Becky hiccup-laughing. Stay for the short hair-based doomsday cult.

Sources for this episode include: Oxygen. filmdaily.com. St. Louis Today. Dateline’s There’s Something about Pam podcast.

“Get right with God!” said the child porn hoarding cop: Deep fake cheerleader videos & Instagram blackmail

Thu, 30 Sep 2021 11:37:45 -0700

This week’s podcast episode has your hosts trying to make sense of the Pennsylvania deep-fake cheerleading scandal, albeit with mild success. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn't know you had, like:

Why does Merie keep threatening Becky with photos involving brownie batter? Which app is protected by Merie’s “Attention Whore"-based email password? How long would it take YOU to recognize someone performing an uninvited sex act on an Instagram phone call? How many old lady alert red flags can be spotted in this episode? Would YOU go on Good Morning America and lie about vaping just to stay a Viper?! What pervy things would Merie leave behind if she (totally legally) searched your house? Is Sweden a part of The Netherlands? (And how could anyone possibly know that?)

Come for the police-y things. Stay for the toxic traits, revenge, dating boys, and smoking.

Follow Becky’s Instagram at @theveraciousvoyager.

Sources for this include: New York Times. Cosmo. Vice.

“Marlboro cigarettes, Everclear alcohol, and regret!” COVID-19 and bad, bad behavior

Thu, 23 Sep 2021 23:50:36 -0700

This week’s podcast episode delves into COVID-19’s airplane-based mayhem. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn't know you had, like:

Who flies coach because they, “like to be among the people?” Maybe…the prime minister of Douchebagistan? And is he responsible for the Douchenado? How is Becky going to end up in a Bahamian prison because of some high school kids from Boston? How about that new superhero duo of Verbal Evisceraters? Why can’t some of you tell Becky & Merie apart?! Who out there is going to name their kid DoucheShawn? Why is Becky threatening to massage Merie’s head against her will? Is it because Merie is threatening to honk Becky’s boob? Come for inane voice compliments. Stay for Becky & Merie debating snarky rules of airline travel.

Sources for this episode include: Forbes, NPR, meaww.com. The Real Spark, James Bates: @the_real_spark

Don’t they have dental care in prison?! Christy Martin’s horrifying marriage & incredible escape from a murderous monster

Fri, 17 Sep 2021 23:53:43 -0700

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky & Merie discuss champion boxer Christy Salters Martin’s abusive-turned-homicidal marriage to piece of human garbage Jim Martin, as told in the Netflix documentary, “Untold: Deal with the Devil.” Along the way, they answer the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: Who amongst us demands proof of life photos of our…pets? How do you keep Merie in a bad relationship? (Hint: Stop at the HEB.) Are you a big, romantic gesture person? If so, Becky has some words for you.

one you know is in a scary, abusive, or potentiall*If you or somey dangerous relationship, please reach out for help. You have options: Visit https://www.thehotline.org or https://www.womenshealth.gov. Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY).

Resources state by state can be found here. You can also text "START" to 88788. In the meantime, read The Gift of Fear and read about preventing your own murder on Becky’s blog. One of those posts is here.

Chip & Jo Jo have supplanted the Branch Davidians: A lingering mystery at Lake Waco, part 2

Thu, 09 Sep 2021 14:53:22 -0700

Welcome back to mystery at Lake Waco, where your hosts attempt to make sense of the crime and the bat-shit crazy investigation that followed. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Just how many motherf**kers are going to end up confessing to this triple murder?

Why is Becky scared of her suitcase? And is it tied to her fear of a lengthy COVID-related jail sentence? Was Merie once a baby shark or a werewolf? Just what does Tab Harper, just like the soft drink & Becky’s cat, have to do with all of this? Just why hasn’t Merie read the transcripts of the trials? What documentary is Becky warning you not to watch if you are feeling suicidal? Who has two thumbs & killed those kids? Come for the Zen voice. Stay for the ranch dressing packet talk that stuns Becky into silence.

So…Chili killed the wrong girl for a limping guy named Lucky?! A lingering mystery at Lake Waco, part 1

Fri, 03 Sep 2021 15:12:49 -0700

This week’s podcast episode finds Becky & Merie discussing the (solved? unsolved?) case of three teenagers, Jill Montgomery, Raylene Rice, and Kenneth Franks, who were murdered at Lake Waco in 1982. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Will Merie EVER get the intro to this show correct the first time???!!! IS there such s thing as Hustler Forum? Just how terrifying are Becky’s Baby Jane floating red lips? (Hint: “subtle” isn’t her middle name.) Which of your pod-coasts has the balls to declare, “I’m a pretty handsome dude!” What lone wolf cop character will be played by Tommy Lee Jones in the movie version of this tragedy? Can your pod-coasts get through one episode without the magazine Texas Monthly? (hint: no!) Is being found immediately after you’re murdered in your home a good reason to…attend church? Would Becky rather face a serial killer in a dark alleyway or attend Scarborough Fair? (hint: bring on Bundy!) How long into this episode does it take before we finally land on blaming a devil cult for this horrible triple murder? Come for Becky’s brag about knowing “a lot about life insurance.” Stay for the poor imitations of a French accent.

Sources for this episode include: Texas Monthly. An Innocence Project’s article about the role bite mark evidence has played in miscarriages of justice.

Candy & Betty, part 2: So I had an affair with an ax murderer

Thu, 26 Aug 2021 16:31:47 -0700

This week’s podcast episode seeks to answer the question hanging over us from last week: what the hell really happened to Betty Gore and her murderer, Candy Montgomery?

Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn't know you had, like:

What in the actual f**k is a sweet, intelligent mouth…in regards to a (male) hypnotherapist?! Would someone please for the love of babyjesusinamanger put a stop to Merie’s mail being stolen? Would you want to take a girls’ trip to Chernobyl OR visit an ax-murdering therapist in Georgia? Does someone shushing you lead directly to their murder? (No? Guess it’s just Candy, then.) Do YOU bring a weapon when you tell someone you don’t want to see them ever again…until tomorrow? Does Becky’s kitty cat Harper’s meow sound like a squeak or a chirp? What makes Merie want to enlist Candy & her married lover in a plan for exiting Afghanistan? Come for the impression of an ax murderer’s wails of agony. Stay for the neck cream recommendation.

Candy & Betty part 1: The ax-wielding, thong-wearing, real housewives of 1980‘s Dallas

Thu, 19 Aug 2021 16:34:02 -0700

This week’s podcast episode delves into the shocking and scandalous murder of Betty Gore at the hands of Candy Montgomery. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn't know you had, like:

What is it about Texas movie pickles that might make Becky ax-murder Merie? What are “Texas teeth?” And are they a big part of being a slut tease? Who in Merie’s life once declared, “We can't let you die because you haven't paid us yet!” Does your prenup for your affair smell like...the carpet at the Como Motel?! Are you going to take Becky to be Medieval Times and leave her there? (Well, that depends…do you HATE her?) Do you use the detergent that smells like…dudes?! (You should: it’s awesome.) When you ax-murder someone, do YOU go home & have sex with your husband? Come for the coquettish exuberance. Stay for Merie’s horrifying doctor story that sends Becky’s brain into screensaver mode.

Sources for this episode include PopSugar. Texas Monthly. Local Profile. In & Around.

further sources:https://soapboxie.com/government/Betty-Gore-Candy-Montgomery

https://www.dallasobserver.com/arts/an-intrepid-couple-explores-the-romantic-highs-of-dallas-lowest-motels-9136882

“You don't wanna get serial killed by your trail guide for being bitchy!” Camping & hiking murder tales

Thu, 12 Aug 2021 18:18:38 -0700

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky & Merie take on real-life camping horror stories, including the Cowden family massacre and the Wells Gray Park murders. Along the way, they answer the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

If you get the haircut that shows off your muscles, should you go camping then? (hint: no.) Is Merie going to be grizzly man or grizzly woman? How did Becky narrowly avoid causing herself to get serial killed on the Appalachian Trail? And how many times do your pod-coasts say the word “Appalachian” without actually covering any murders that happened there? Does your water list cancer as the first ingredient? Who wants to be part of the pilot episode of our new romantic matchmaking show, “90 Day(s) till Parole Fiancee?”

Come for the haircut-based marriage advice. Stay for the plans for a girls’ trip to Chernobyl.

“Would HE wear a mask on a Southwest Airlines flight?!” Kenneth McDuff’s predictable & preventable Texas serial killing rampages

Fri, 06 Aug 2021 00:18:49 -0700

The notorious & terrifying serial killer Kenneth Allen McDuff has the dubious distinction of two things: having TWO death row numbers AND being this podcast’s only episode ever to feature just one murderer. In this episode, Becky & Merie also answer the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Just how did this guy become a serial killer when his middle name isn’t Lee or Dale or Wayne? Does Becky & Merie’s friendship hang in the balance over the brilliant and hilarious TV show Ted Lasso? Is Merie actually Becky’s weird email blog stalker? (You can subscribe with a real email address here!) Do YOU remember the last time you prowled around asking people to have sex with you? Neither does Becky. It’s been a while. Does Merie FINALLY drop an F-bomb in this episode?! Who is the one serial killer Merie & Becky REALLY don’t like? (As opposed to the ones they…DO like?!!) Whose new email address is BeckyisaHeightSupremacist@gmail.com?

How often did Becky or Merie stop going to their final exams and start murdering instead?

Please subscribe to Texas Monthly. Do it NOW.

No, seriously. Where the f**k did they GO?

Thu, 29 Jul 2021 11:53:40 -0700

Be sure to visit Urban Owl for adorable home decor. Get 20% off by using our special code NowFearThis.

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky & Merie take on some creepy disappearances. Cherrie Mahan, Phoenix Coldon, and Suzie Streeter, Sherill Levitt & Stacy McCall - AKA the “Springfield Three” - get the NFT! treatment. Along the way, Becky & Merie address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Why did this episode almost get named, “Tampons are for Promiscuous Women?” What t-shirts will cause Dateline to NOT describe Merie & Becky as “innocent” victims when they up and disappear one day? Why do your podcoasts need a safeword? And why the hell is theirs related to…virginity?! Why is Becky threatening to go up to the deli counter while wearing no pants? Anyone want some KY3? Us, either. Have YOU heard nice things about Joplin, MO? (We love you, Joplin, and invite everyone to contribute to the revitalization of your downtown.) Come to learn which of your hosts is a cross between Nancy Reagan & The Cure. Stay for Becky’s impersonation of a judgmental medical examiner.

Please support the Black and Missing Foundation.

Becky’s blog about snarky tees can be found here: https://www.veraciousvoyager.com

“Sauces are sketchy, too!” Which crimes intrigue & which induce sleep?

Tue, 18 May 2021 17:10:46 -0700

We’re taking a break but NOT consciously uncoupling. For the next little while, your pod-coasts will be taking a breather from new episodes.

But this episode STILL has the trademark snark, cursing and dishing on MURDER you have come to expect. So when NFT! comes back, you can look forward to these and more getting the Now Fear This! treatment:

Brendan Dassey. Chad Daybell and Lori Vallow. NXIVM and India Oxenberg. Heaven’s Gate. The Lake Waco murders. Darlie Routier. Candy Montgomery. Kenneth Allen McDuff. Golden State Killer. Not to mention: Brainwashing. Cutls. False confessions.

And, what will you NOT hear your podcoasts talk about? We’re (not) looking at you, bored and completely uninterested: Jodi Arias, Casey Anthony, and David Koresh.

And don’t forget those burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: IS there a Superbad vortex? When you start your doomsday sex cult, would you do that in…Idaho? Does the gorgeous and talented Tamryn Hall listen to our show? No, seriously. Could someone tell her to please listen? We ❤️ her. How come Merie doesn’t think the Staircase guy is guilty?! Can Becky stop insulting Chip and Jojo JUST FOR ONE DAMNED EPISODE?! Read the brilliant I’ll be Gone In the Dark. Do it now.

See you soon!!!!!!

Is orange the new pink? ‘Cause it’s murder plotting amateur hour

Tue, 11 May 2021 18:19:43 -0700

Be sure to visit Urban Owl for adorable home decor. Get 20% off by using our special code NowFearThis.

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky and Merie take on murder plots: real and imagined, online and face-to-face, “successful” and unsuccessful. Ted and Corey Shaughnessy, John Michael Musbach, Wanda Holloway, and Dalia Dippolito get the NFT! treatment. Along the way, your hosts address burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Who is it that spoke good English and was beautifully attired? And is she 5000% sure she wants to kill someone? Wanna go with your podcoasts to a drug cartel hangout just because they’ve got good tequila? If your hit man doesn’t follow through, do you ask for a refund? Why do stupid murder plots give Becky hope for humanity’s future? Is that cheesecake or cocaine? Do you bring your dayplanner to your pre-med murder along with a sticky note of who hired you to do it? If you want to hire the Boats and Hos Prestige Worldwide Sicilian International Hitwomen, either “Pm us” (?) or slide into our DMs.

Come for the Dark Nordstrom. Stay for Merie’s failed attempt at starting a drug ring with Oxycontin.

Sources for this episode include: The Austin-American Statesman. CBS Austin. Info Security Magazine.

Is chanting “om” an invitation to a demon?! The Satanic Panic of the 80’s, 90’s & today

Tue, 04 May 2021 18:29:49 -0700

This week’s podcast episode finds Becky and Merie exploring the phenomenon called Satanic Panic, its victims (the West Memphis 3; McMartin Preschool workers, not the children; yoga; Ouija boards; rock music; Dungeons & Dragons…), and its connection to QAnon and conspiracy theories of today. Along the way they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

How would Merie’s hairstyle have caused her to be the first suspect if somebody had been murdered at her church? If you said you were flushed down a toilet and came out the other side, would the police believe you? Whose weekend plans include a car wash, a game of “naked movie star” AND a hot air balloon ride? Does Becky’s repeated use of a name accidentally summon Satan? What word does Merie repeat so much that Becky tries ASMR to get her to stop? If you play this episode backwards, what secret messages do you get?

Come for the spiritual dinners. Stay for the fart threats.

Bonus points for whoever catches Becky’s unattributed “Friends” quoting.

Sources for this episode include: The Austin-American Statesman. CBS News. ABC 7 Chicago. Texas Monthly and Texas Monthly.

“Are you having, like, a Texas seizure?” Real-life babysitting horror stories

Tue, 27 Apr 2021 19:43:13 -0700

This week’s episode finds Becky and Merie trading babysitting & housesitting horror stories, including murder that is both solved (Cassie Stoddart) and unsolved (Janett Christman). Along the way they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Where does babysitting land on Now Fear This’s Fear-o-meter? Who has read the book version of Eyes Wide Shut? If you’re not answering Merie’s texts, are you in jail? And, what kind of grade will you get on that speech? How did Merie survive her older sister’s babysitting? Is our new theme song going to be, “I hate you because you’re so shitty” and who will write the melody? Before murdering someone, should you ask yourself if you’re too dumb to do it? (Hint: yes!)

Don’t be scared if Merie asks how you would cover up the perfect murder. She’s asking for a friend.

Video of the 2 murderers can be found here. Sources for this episode include the following:

Medium.com. thecriminaljournal.com.

“You f**king ruined Thanksgiving!” Yacht rock and the prevention of road rage-fueled murder

Tue, 20 Apr 2021 18:44:01 -0700

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky and Merie discuss the terrifying and sometimes deadly phenomenon known as road rage. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

How did Merie’s margarita needs not only ruin Thanksgiving, but also get her featured on the evening news? Why is Merie going to go into her safe room and never come out? How DO you talk to your kitty cats about gun safety? Does 10 years in prison for road rage murder teach you a lesson? (or…Florida?) Don’t you feel like yelling “I gotta be me!” when someone is stopping you from being…kind? Come for the spontaneous Hall & Oates karaoke. Stay for the shopping cart rules. Please go to Big Waves and read about the Bigelow family’s story and gun locks.

Becky’s piece on road rage can be found on www.veraciousvoyager.com.

“I’m not insulting Lifetime movies!” Consent, sexual assault, and A Promising Young Woman

Tue, 13 Apr 2021 15:51:10 -0700

***Trigger alert/content warning: This episode includes graphic descriptions of sexual assault, especially related to college and parties and acquaintance rape. Please visit the NSVRC.org for help, information, resources, and support.

As April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, this week’s podcast episode finds Becky and Merie diving headlong into the world of college parties, alcohol, consent, rape, and revenge, with the Oscar-nominated movie Promising Young Woman taking center stage. Along the way they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Can a sports bra cause you to injure one of your lats? Also, what is the exact location of a lat and how could anyone possibly know that?

Why does Merie keep trying to give Becky a stroke? Why is Becky finally inspired to reference her blog, veraciousvoyager.com? Is the state legislature of Minnesota ever going to come to its senses about this issue? And same goes for Hollywood…

Do people really go to the laundry room and NOT expect to be molested? (hint: YES, you moron.) What pickup line makes Becky want to commit a Promising Young Woman-type act? What is Merie threatening to draw on Becky’s face the next time she’s passed out? What are the verrrrrry explicit directions Becky gives to one particular writer from the National Review as for what he can do to himself? Come for the ladies’ athletic wear terror. Stay for the ways that you, too, can stop yourself from raping someone. (hint: don’t do it.)

Sources for this episode include:

Becky’s Veracious Voyager blogs like this one on rape prevention. 9gag.com’s Rape prevention checklist for dudes. Washington Post.

Rockin’ out in the Catacombs: When faith & crime collide

Tue, 06 Apr 2021 18:46:14 -0700

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky and Merie discuss some Netflix religious-based crime documentaries, featuring (the what-in-the-actual-fuck , mind-melting) Abducted in Plain Sight and A Murder Among Mormons. Along the way, they address burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Should I skip the first 5 minutes if I am really fucking tired of these 2 women talking about losing weight? (hint: YES!) In what way is Merie’s husband like a pimp? And why didn’t she order him to tell someone that she doesn’t order him around? Should you listen to the ladies’ interpretation of the King James Bible? (And, on that note, when was it that Jesus drop the mic?) Who wants first dibs on a “Team White Salamander” t-shirt? How about reverse engineering the story of the Garden of Eden? Why does Merie request that Becky make weird noises with her microphone?

Come for Merie’s universal password. Stay for a salamander finding a Dr. Pepper in the woods.

Sources for this episode include: A Vanity Fair article. Forbes’s analysis of LDS’s connection to Abducted in Plain Sight. MSN. Grunge.com.

How about authoritarian-light as a parenting strategy? Slender Man, internet lore, and real life violence

Tue, 30 Mar 2021 19:50:54 -0700

This week’s episode finds Becky and Merie diving headlong into the confounding world of urban myths and internet lore, with Slender Man taking center stage. Along the way they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: Why was Merie the only woman amongst a bunch of nerdy, sweaty guys for 2 hours? Which star of Supernatural should fear Becky’s undying devotion to him? (Hint: she’s a Dean girl!) Can you really get Merie to do pretty much anything you ask just by telling her how awesome she is? (Hint: Yes!) How many calories are burned from attempting to stab someone to death? Which one of you is on Becky’s list of people to sacrifice so she can become a proxy to Slender Man? How did Merie narrowly avoid being the Madame of a sex slavery brothel? Is Morgan & Tenille a new band whose first hit will be “Slenderman” sung to the tune of “Rocket Man?” What latex-based fetish documentary may or may not feature Becky or Merie? Which love scene in a movie might just be the sexiest non-sex scene ever? (Hint: Chris Evans & Anna Ferris!) Come for the moth talk. Stay for the love language.

The awesome show Supernatural’s #Thinman episode can be found on Netflix here. (Prepare to be creeped the F out!)

Sources on Slender Man for this episode include: Cosmo. Reuters. Vulture. Washington Post. The Sun. Info on the Mandela Effect can be found here.

Everyone claims their father was the Zodiac: There are bad dads & then there are Bad Dads

Tue, 23 Mar 2021 18:04:08 -0700

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky and Merie talk all about fathers who commit crimes and the children who face the consequences, featuring the horrible cases of Joseph Fritzl, Steven Pladl and Joseph Kallinger. Along the way, they address burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Who wants to invest in their underpants-free “bottomless” bar, Cooter’s? Anyone want to apply to be the panty check person?

Whom do the girls plan to sue for adultery?

If you get invited to a wedding where someone's marrying their own father, should you just just RSVP no? (hint: yes!!!!!!)

What is that unidentifiable glop in Merie’s microwave?

What exactly do fairy elves from the woods and unicorn rainbow farts smell like?

Come for the floral chemical smell. Stay for the Cooter’s menu options.

Role playing a whispering Teletubby: Is true crime “ASMR” a sign of the end times?

Tue, 16 Mar 2021 15:49:43 -0700

This week’s podcast episode has Becky and Merie dealing with the Youtube craze known as ASMR. What the f**k is that, you ask?! (Becky, too! Listen to learn and laugh your ass off.) Along the way, your pod-coasts address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: Why is Merie threatening to take Becky to a cabin in New Mexico for a bubble bath? Just how many grams ARE there in a pint of vodka? (And how could anyone possibly know that?!) What the hell is the Bread Face Effect and why is Becky going to be dead because of it? Which of your pod-coasts will role play a whispering Teletubby? Stay to the end to hear ideas for what Merie can do with an olive focaccia loaf. (Also: Didn't we already deal with the brain orgasms?)

"The sting never fades with me." Revenge by murder, porn, headbutting, and deadly coconuts

Tue, 09 Mar 2021 18:48:12 -0700

Revenge takes center stage in this week's episode, as Merie and Becky cover cases of French football (soccer) revenge, the first-degree murder revenge of Gary Plauche, and that oh-so-horrible thing known as revenge porn. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn't know you had, like:

Just how many t-shirts are there in Merie’s closet? (Hint: it’s as many shoes as Becky has in hers.) How DO you get revenge in debate using Ripley's Believe it or Not? Are adult beverages fueling this episode or not? Which of your hosts was Marie Kondo'd herself? What are the hottest sex scenes involving Oscar nominated actors? Come for the quoting of the show "Yellowstone." Stay for Becky's recommended reaction to speakerphones in public.

Are short-term house rentals the H. H. Holmes murder castles of today?

Tue, 02 Mar 2021 18:21:11 -0700

In this week’s podcast episode, Becky & Merie dive into house-share horror stories, ranging from being filmed in the bedroom to assault or even murder. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Does Merie need her butler to be a personal cheerleader or fold her underpants into fourths? (Hint: both.) How did Merie end up causing a potted plant to explode? If you rent out your house, should you keep precious family heirlooms on the porch? (Hint: No. Don’t be an idiot.) Who is it that left behind ammo and a hundred dollars in ones in Becky’s guest room in Montana? (No, really: WHO?!!!) SHOULD you get up and leave Merie’s house when she morphs into Songbird? (Hint: YES.)

Come for Merie’s thoughts on the dangers of self-reflection. Stay for her acoustic guitar-serenading bed & breakfast.

"Put down that sandwich!" Food & drink based crime & murder

Tue, 23 Feb 2021 17:06:55 -0700

Just how adorable are the true crime items at Urban Owl? Answer: Very. Use the code NOWFEARTHIS for 20% off.

This week’s podcast episode finds Becky & Merie “dishing” on crime and murder involving food and drink (see what we did there?!), with the Johnson family cancer murders, the Dallas poop sprinkler, and a cult out of Oregon on the list. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Is a Subway sandwich technically a crime? (According to the law or according to Becky?) Is poisoning someone the “graffiti of attempted murder?” If you’re lucky, WHAT could be duck feathers? What do silly putty, breast implants, and chicken McNuggets all have in common? If you are an heiress, should you give all your inheritance to a cult guru? Hey (hint: no) ARE the mayonnaise police coming?

Come for the $11 wine mixing. Stay for the beaver anal glands.

Sources for this ep include: The Dallas Observer. Free RepubIic. The blog Suzuki’s Thoughts. The Atlantic.

“No one has peed on my window since moving to the Valley.” Video surveillance, pre-crime, and pre-meditated murder

Tue, 16 Feb 2021 20:23:25 -0700

This week’s podcast episode finds Becky and Merie watching creepy footage of crimes, criminals, and creepers, including the Cecil Hotel mystery case of Elisa Lam and the still-unsolved murder of Missy Bevers in Texas. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: Does a prenup-based candle smell like money? D’ya’ll want to pre-order the official Now Fear This “Smells Like Our Disapproval” candle? Did Merie get arrested for pre-crime or contemplate divorce in Oklahoma? What IS really in Subway’s “tuna” sandwich? (And Becky is vindicated! Proof of how gross Subway is can be found here.) If you’ve got bad credit, SHOULD you buy a GPS-car and commit a crime with it? (hint: no.) Would you want to know if your cat's butt has been on your toothbrush? How does a pet cam make Becky feel like an asshole? What behavior of Becky’s sends Merie’s brain into screensaver mode?

“Is everyone else being a furry out there?” Secret lives and the people who live them

Tue, 09 Feb 2021 17:28:04 -0700

This week’s podcast episode takes us into super-secret lives. Becky and Merie talk about that police chief in Texas with a wife and TWO fiancées (!), Merie’s secret agent dad, and other various and sundry serial killers roaming the streets. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Has anyone seen Becky’s wine?

Who else has a secret girlfriend in Kansas? (Who doesn’t?!)

What Texas town has the worst weather in the USA? AND the worst police chief?

Do you want to be a part of a footsie-based Harvard lab experiment? (Us, either!)

What covert activity is Merie likely engaging in when she’s alone in front of the mirror?

What is Merie’s secret life involving a boxed set of Dawson’s Creek? And which one of the ladies is still crushing hard on Pacey - er, Joshua Jackson?

Will YOU invite the ladies to your furry convention?

*Note: Skip over minute 12 if you plan to watch The Undoing.

A giant stuffed purple ape is not the solution: Can y’all just stop with all the stalking?

Tue, 02 Feb 2021 19:02:12 -0700

This week's episode has Becky and Merie covering some terrifying and deadly stalking situations, including Cindy James Hack, Maria Jimenez-Rodriguez, and Laura Black. They also offer expert advice on avoiding stalkers and avoiding being a stalker. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Just how many stalkers have Merie and Becky had? Why does Merie advise you to always keep some COVID expansion clothes? Does she have a Marvel shirt-based case of PTSD? Where ARE all the friendly neighborhood stalkers? What word of the day does Merie ban Becky from saying ever again? Just how long did Merie stalk Becky before they became friends? Just how much relationship guidance can you get from one Law & Order episode? What is Becky’s height-based superpower? Will the earth actually lose gravity for 2 seconds in May (or did it already?!!!)? And should you chain yourself to an oxygen machine in such cases?

Come for the Six Flags-based makeout sessions. Stay to learn whether obsessively standing in front of someone's workplace will prove your devotion.

Sources for this episode include the life-saving Gavin deBecker book The Gift of Fear. The Ft Worth Star Telegram’s article on Maria Jimenez-Rodriguez.

“Always sit by a male stranger on a bus” and other advice a serial killer would give

Tue, 26 Jan 2021 18:22:18 -0700

This week's episode deals with terrifying dating advice for women, from the 50’s, 90’s, and 2000’s. Along the way, your pod-coasts address burning questions you didn’t know you had, like, how many women were murdered as a result of dating advice from a ladies’ magazine? Why should you avoid looking at your dinner date AT ALL COSTS? How flattering is it when your date gets angry when you reject his sexual advances? Also:

Just how little effort does it take for Merie to lounge on the couch and end up in a romantic relationship? Why doesn’t Merie want to come to your wine and painting party? Is that a syphalytic wart or a herpee? Do you have to accept every dick pic that is sent your way?

Come for Becky’s ridiculous seductive voice that makes Merie bananas. Stay for specific advice on how to die miserable and alone.

If you want to NOT get serial murdered and would like some real advice for how to stay safe when navigating the dating world, read, “Preventing your own Murder,” parts 1, 2, and 3.

Getting pregnant from a yeast infection? Bummer! Ob-gyns & the urge to inseminate, like, everyone

Wed, 20 Jan 2021 10:33:33 -0700

This week’s podcast episode finds Becky and Merie watching a documentary* about the (all-too-common and creepy AF phenomenon) gynecologist trying to impregnate every women in sight.

Along the way, the girls address all the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

What is it about doctor appointments that turns Merie into the Incredible Hulk? Does Becky really want to see sperm swimming inside a microscope? Does Merie still believe her parents were on the up-and-up? Is anyone actually interested in a socialism vs. fascism lesson from your two favorite pod-coasts? (us, either!) What would your doctor do if you suddenly put both of your legs behind your head like a contortionist during your next ob-gyn exam? Which one of these ladies is a former Young Republican? (And WHY?!) Does Merie regret knowing the calorie count of a zucchini muffin? What is her odd connection to the Infamous Octo-mom?

Come for the gods of our podcasts. Stay for the sperm-bragging.

Fear of Satan is not a deterrent: Teenage passion, parental obsession, and death in Texas high school football

Wed, 13 Jan 2021 09:53:33 -0700

This week’s episode finds Merie and Becky delving into a Texas-based obsessive football parent, Bill Butterfield, and discussing the violence that ensues. Along the way, they address burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

What exactly IS Merie’s violent past with the Texas speech and debate circuit? Why is Becky giving wholehearted encouragement for you to be an abject failure? Why is Merie trying to destroy your dreams? Whose house is filled with all the gluten? How will Merie somehow manage to be the first woman president, as predicted by her high school classmates? Just how terribly inaccurate was Merie’s COVID wine bottle count? Why isn’t Merie convinced that Becky is actually pretty good at sports? Which is the better film: Bernie or Weekend at Bernie’s? (hint: it’s Bernie.)

Come for the shower thoughts and farm analogies. Stay for the most hilarious softball story you’ve ever heard. (Trust me.)

This episode is all based on the awesome writing of Skip Hollandsworth in Texas Monthly. Read the article here.

Further resources: National Abuse Hotline https://www.thehotline.org/ Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)

Please read this book on prediction and prevention of violence. It will save your life. Watch the 30 for 30 about Aaron Hernandez.

QAnon? Try Q-a-Nope

Tue, 05 Jan 2021 19:54:15 -0700

***NOTE: This episode was recorded 3 days BEFORE the assault on our nation’s capital on January 6, 2021. The jokes in here are intended to address the ridiculousness of these conspiracies and in NO WAY make light of their violent outcomes.***

Y’all. We gotta talk about some conspiracy sh*t. In this week’s podcast episode, the girls dive into the mentality of conspiracy believers, honing in on the group calling itself QAnon. Along the way, they address some burning questions you didn’t know you had, like: Just how many times will Cheetoes get a shoutout on this one little show and during this one little episode? What is Becky willing to do to have a connection to a certain prime minister to the north? How comfy are Memphis’s Peabody Hotel’s duck pants? Who are the 18 asshole members of Congress who voted AGAINST admonishing QAnon? Is the movie “Agents of Chaos” really a recruitment video for unemployed graphic artists? Who wants to start protesting those freedom-killing rules like “no pants/no service?” What is all this about Merie’s machete-based childhood summers? Come for the Netflix “Pedophile Patrol” series proposal. Stay for some “Q-tips” for avoiding driving yourself up into this crazytown.

Where the f**k did they go?! Suddenly disappeared, still missing

Tue, 29 Dec 2020 18:28:02 -0700

This week’s episode has Becky & Merie discussing some creepy-assed unsolved disappearances, from far-flung places including Ireland and Iowa, as Jodi Huisentruit, Prisma Reyes, and Dublin's Vanishing Triangle are among the cases that keep them up at night.

Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

What would you ask for on an ancient penis-shaped wishing stone? And when will they start selling those at Hot Topic?

IS Chris Pine the love of Becky’s life? How does she manage to insult all the sports fans in the continent of Australia? (She apologizes for that, by the way.)

Did Merie or Becky experience an attempted kidnapping from some dudes in an El Camino? Does Merie really (finally?) render Becky speechless with a story of a man secretly living an attic?!! Does Becky (finally?) peer pressure Merie into cussing on the show?

How quickly can y’all get to Dallas for the magical food experience that is Ebar Tex-Mex? And can Becky come along?!

Shoutout to Unsolved Mysteries on Netflix. Keep up the good work.

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear 12: Drink a Santa’s panties & don’t watch Rudolph

Thu, 24 Dec 2020 09:28:03 -0700

The final puny-but-cutey 12th of our first annual 12 fears of Christmas brings us to some much-needed (and feared?) Christmas movie recommendations*. Now, because we are, you know, us, we have to hate a bit on the ole Christmas movie “classic” known as Rudolph, but otherwise we spread the love around, much like the whipped cream on top of a Santa’s panties drink.

*Bad Moms Christmas, Mixed Nuts, Office Christmas Party, Trading Places, Dan in Real Life, Gremlins, the unbeatable ELF, and the Holiday make the cut this year.

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #11: Merie diagnoses Becky’s “Love, Actually”-based psychological condition

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 16:21:17 -0700

The 11th Fear of this season's 12 tiny episodes brings Becky some much-needed counseling over her “Love, Actually”-induced anger issues. Believe it or not, Merie finally has an official diagnosis for whatever the hell is going on with Becky and this movie. Is it a phobia? A mania? A delusion? The condition now actually has a name. Tune in for THAT!

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #10: Office holiday parties

Tue, 22 Dec 2020 17:16:23 -0700

This wee episode coves the good ole office holiday party! Need we say more? Yes? Okay! How 'bout this:

Is Becky the only one who wasn't hooking up at all those office Christmas parties? Some tips: be sure you don't tell Sally from accounting that you're cheating on your husband. (Also, don't cheat on your husband.) If you don't normally sexually harass people, don’t do it at the office holiday party either, okay?

Come for advice on J-Lo inspired outfits. Stay to hear about rock star Merie getting drunk and taking a nap.

Becky & Merie’s 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #9: Put down that nog!

Mon, 21 Dec 2020 16:03:46 -0700

This pocket-sized episode brings us to all the terrifying food and drink that haunt us every holiday season. Also:

How did nutmeg almost lead to Merie not having a podcast at all?! Who wants some Polish jello fish? Did women finally become literate so they could exchange Sprite salad recipes? What is a green nightmare? Anyone want some cheese or fish nog? No? Us, either. Also, are those olives in there?

Becky & Merie’s 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #8: Murder-based holiday traditions

Sun, 20 Dec 2020 17:17:32 -0700

In this tiny-but-mighty episode, we continue our dive into interesting international holiday traditions. Why must so many of them involve the torture and murder (and eating?!!!) of children? Also:

Who wants an eternal cannibal man servant?! (We do!) Is getting naked with your family more fearful than a serial killing cat? Is being killed for eating cookies a reasonable punishment? And, stop haunting all those houses, Danny!

Becky & Merie’s 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #7: Krampus

Sat, 19 Dec 2020 17:22:43 -0700

The incredibly creepy-looking creature known as Krampus takes center stage in this pint-sized episode. Also:

What exactly IS the Panda Express version of this Krampus creature? Do Santa and Krampus run a shoe store together, or do they sell insurance during the day? What about the lullaby about the disembowelling Christmas shapeshifter?

When you're the Pope, they let you do WHAT?!!

And, you had Becky at “more cowbell.”

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #6: Santa's criminal history

Fri, 18 Dec 2020 17:04:04 -0700

In this petite lil ole episode, we continue our quest to ruin all of your Christmas memories by explaining the sordid history of the big man himself. Also:

How can Becky' & Merie’s new grunge band, Flemish Trunk Hos, aid in getting rid of a celebration that includes blackface? When was it that Santa bore a strong resemblance to Slender Man? How is Don Draper responsible for the Santa we know today? Stay to the end for some really bad cabaret.

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #5: Christmas wants you dead

Thu, 17 Dec 2020 16:32:05 -0700

In this eensy-weensy episode, Becky & Merie wonder: poinsettias, brightly colored bulbs, rooftops, or Tide pods…which one is most likely to kill you this time of year? Also:

Should you fear your cat or 9 year-old Merie, or both? What is Merie’s sordid history with a common cooking spice? And what's with all the Fitz & Floyd Tumbling Santa limbs strewn everywhere?

Come for the peach and cream artificial Christmas tree. Stay for the most personal question Becky has ever asked Merie.

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #4: "Love, Actually"

Wed, 16 Dec 2020 17:07:48 -0700

Ooooohhhh...this one might hurt. So, listen, um, full confession: Becky is, shall we say, NOT a fan of the purported holiday romcom, "Love, Actually." Tune in, if you dare, for a no-holds-barred takedown of this “beloved” “Christmas” “classic” that is so hate-filled, so profanity-laced, so viciously graphic that Merie actually finds herself inspired to watch it for the first time.

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #3: "Baby, it's Cold Outside"

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 14:38:25 -0700

In this adorably tiny episode, we explore the controversy over the classic tune, "Baby it's Cold Outside." Just how rapey is this song?!! Is it really an S&M fantasy sung by Dean Martin back in the ‘40s? Who the hell is Wolf and why is he making drinks for Mouse? Is Mouse really scared of a date rape drug in her gin rickey?!!! Also:

Did Merie’s husband get her to marry him by using big words like Rorschach Test?! Come for the womansplaining of context and consent. Stay because Merie might actually sing the first 3 "Fears of Christmas" at the end of this episode.

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #2: Creepy Carols

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 16:17:00 -0700

In our second super-miniature "12 Fears of Christmas" episode, we explore some pretty terrible holiday tunes, and ask burning questions like, do you remember in 1640 when Christmas was literally canceled? How ‘bout those filthy Druid carols that got people arrested? Also:

Is “12 Days of Christmas” really about human trafficking? Why is Merie from now on to be known as Songbird? How long before she puts Becky to sleep with her statistical analyses? Who will finish the limerick “There once was a girl from Nantucket” as a lovely Christmas carol? Is Becky capable of ignoring her cat long enough to record an episode? Spoiler alert: No

Becky & Merie's 12 Fears of Christmas, Fear #1: A Murderous Story

Sun, 13 Dec 2020 10:25:02 -0700

In this, our first of 12 12-minute teeny, tiny holiday-adjacent episodes, we explore the burning question, what in the actual F**k is up with people dressing up as Santa and murdering a bunch of people?! Also:

How does a flammable Santa suit foil a plot to escape to Canada? It's a little thing called karma, folks. Who wants to hear Merie singing about pod-coasting? What the hell is pod-coasting anyway?! What does a turkey baster and meat thermometer have to do with attempted murder and texting in movies? (Also, can a person survive being stabbed in the neck with a meat thermometer?)

Attending college vs. murdering your entire family: Seems like an easy choice…right?

Wed, 09 Dec 2020 10:14:34 -0700

In this week’s episode, we cover the Jennifer Pan and Bart Whitaker cases, where lying about attending college led to murder, and we dive into the phenomenon of secret lives and their sometimes deadly consequences.

Along the way, we address burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Where are you headed when all you have to do is head down I-45 till you s**t your pants?

Which one of us may or may not have had a CIA-trained sharpshooting grandma?

Are WE among Merie’s list of certain reputable podcasts?

How is Becky going to end up like the Texas cheerleader murdering mom?

Did Dwight Eisenhower accidentally create a dirty joke for Merie’s family?

How will Merie know when it’s time for her to murder Becky?

Can someone stop Becky from using the word “homegirl” ever again? (And is THAT why Merie may have to kill her?!)

Does Becky really quote a Nike ad as encouragement for NOT murdering your family?

Come for the professor and the professional college attender. Stay for a little basic math.

Listen to the end to hear why Becky wants you to live a lie.

Their wedding cake was literally a Twinkie: The unsung romance of marrying a convicted murderer

Wed, 02 Dec 2020 08:00:06 -0700

In this episode we dive into the phenomenon of women marrying mass murderers and serial killers (an obsession so common it actually has a clinical name!).

And we explore the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like, how cool must it have been to be married to Genghis Khan?

Which do you marry: the local rapist or the big time serial killer? And how do you make that roommate switch?

Do you bring up the fact that he’s a murderer in EVERY argument you have? (spoiler alert: yes.)

Does anyone out there want a GPS app where Becky hurls insults at you when you make a wrong turn? (gofundme is a-waitin’!)

Is there some legal requirement where podcasters must talk about Keith Morrison in every episode?

In a zombie apocalypse, would you maybe actually want Scott Peterson to be your husband?

Why does Becky give an uninvited lesson on the theory of evolution?

How can Merie be manipulated into buying 200 hand lotions?

Which is grosser, the fake-crying lying bastard Eric Menendez, or the lawyer who dressed him up in a pastel sweater vest?

Love is love, but do you really have a blind spot big enough to fit 48 dead bodies?

Finally, who out there is going to do the coding for our new website, wellatleastimnotaserialkiller.com?

Come for the serial killing farmers. Stay for the uncited quoting of Jerry Maguire.

Night Stalker cupcakes or Ted Bundy hot sauce? When true crime fandom goes too far

Wed, 25 Nov 2020 05:06:14 -0700

In this episode we look at people who join murderer fan clubs, go on murder-inspired vacations, or send naked pictures and love letters to serial killers.

Along the way we explore the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like, how is Cal State LA responsible for the prevention of a fascist nation? Is the word murderabelia worse than moist or panty Does Merie mistakenly refer to a certain prisoner in Wisconsin by the name of a jewelry company? Whom should you buy true crime-related gifts for this Christmas, Merie or Becky? (spoiler alert: Becky) Should you or should you not move to Waco? (spoiler alert: No.) Why the hell are we talking about a puking cat gravy boat? And, what’s all this about a deranged seagull?

We also find ourselves in the unlikely position of giving you advice about which items you should and should not store in your body cavities. Listen till the end to find out if you should question your life choices.

Even his workout routine was unimpressive: the American tragedy that is the Watts family murders

Wed, 18 Nov 2020 17:01:20 -0700

In this episode, we discuss the Netflix doc American Murder, the Family Next Door, and hurl many insults at the man responsible. Along the way, many questions come to mind, such as:

Just how much of a dim bulb is Chris Watts? Just how much victim-blaming does a woman get for trying to keep her lazy, sociopathic husband under control? Is this moronic murderer at least smart enough to recognize that he’s been caught on surveillance during the crime?

And, how does one badass detective named Tammy get this whole thing wrapped up?

Also: Do all of our problems come from the Bible? Does Becky mispronounce the word “banal?” Does she manage to get through one podcast episode without mentioning Chee-toes? When will Merie start tagging her every post with #blessed, #bestlife, #love him, #luckygirl, #madeforeachother? Who is Walter and how will he manage to murder Merie someday?

Come for the murderer insults. Stay for the lie-detecting Fitbit.

(This episode includes discussions of violence against women and children. To avoid the grim details, skip over minutes 40-44.)

First degree cheesiness or aggravated douchebaggery? Karens, Beckys, and the making of murderous memes

Wed, 11 Nov 2020 18:26:02 -0700

In this episode, we delve into the role that namecalling and meme-making can play in violence and even mass murder. Also, we also address more burning questions you didn’t know you had, like, does a child molester sandwich really have around 200 calories? Who are all these Karens and Stacys, Chads and Brads? Is the Becky of this very show the same Becky of Uggs and Starbucks fame, and is she really too busy gluing rhinestones back on her iPhone case to realize what's actually going on?! (Maybe)

Is her biggest concern falling after her heel gets caught in the cobblestone while chasing after her boyfriend in the meat packing district? (Only sometimes!)

Which should we fear more: Siri or Alexa? Claritin or Allegra?

And, finally: Oh my God, Becky! Why does Merie want to see the manager?!

Challenging American Exceptionalism: Who is better at serial murder?

Wed, 04 Nov 2020 19:32:09 -0700

In this episode we cover serial killer partners in crime. Looking at the Moors murders, the Ken and Barbie killers, USA’s horrifying Leonard Lake and Charles Ng and more, we want to know what motivates these men and women.

Why did they get together and make themselves not just worse, but THE worst?

Also: Who does Merie think are the laziest serial killers on the planet? Does Becky really say "feminine-ize?" Is that even a word? Does she also misuse the phrase vice-versa? Why does Merie fear we’ve run out of American serial killers? What is Becky’s teeny-tiny connection to England’s Moors murders? What the hell is a passive-aggressive murder style? And, how do you pronounce Dnepropetrovsk, anyway?

Psychoanalyze yourself over a coupla Coronas

Mon, 02 Nov 2020 13:46:39 -0700

This is our preview/compilation episode, giving you your first chance to hear some observations, anecdotes, hot fear opinions and more! Subscribe ASAP!

For this step in our vaguely dirty-sounding “soft” launch, we present to you a preview! In this compilation of future scary episodes, we address all your burning questions, like: should you murder someone on the third date or wait until later? Can one weekend in Alaska turn a woman from a nightmare to an angel? Does Costco really put tequila into their margarita mixes? And, what is with all the damaged pantyhose? (Also, what’s with pantyhose?) Our actual, full-length true and terrifying episode 1 will be available the week of Nov 2.. Just in time to distract you from the frightening election!