I Hate It, Let’s Watch It

225. RE-RELEASE - Infinity Pool

Thu, 27 Aug 2026 00:01:00 -0400

As the world prepares to watch Alexander Skarsgard take on yet another absolutely unhinged movie role, let us remember him before he was a wicker basket -- as a man who played one of the most pathetic, spineless characters in cinema history. Infinity Pool rubbed us in ALL the wrong ways. What started as a fascinating morality tale curdled (like breast milk) into something uncomfy and gross. Wicker husband would NEVER.

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224. RE-RELEASE - X

Thu, 20 Aug 2026 00:01:00 -0400

If haunted islands aren't your ideal summer vacation destination, how about a derelict barn AirBnB just down the hill from a structurally unsound farmhouse inhabited by some creepy/sexy old people? There's a lovely swamp for swimming that is definitely NOT filled with alligators, and if you're lucky, you might get to be an extra in a porn movie!

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223. RE-RELEASE - The Resort

Thu, 13 Aug 2026 16:49:31 -0400

Even though the summer is coming to a close, there's still enough time left for one more vacation! May we interest you in a deserted island with an abandoned hotel haunted by a "half-face girl" that we never actually see? What is a "half face" anyway? Which half is missing? This movie fails to answer that and MANY more questions.

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222. Hook

Thu, 06 Aug 2026 00:01:00 -0400

This is the movie they should be showing high school kids to get them to stay away from drugs because YIKES. An addiction to "pixie dust" turns what we assume was once a normal human man into a homicidal psychopath with (inexplicably) a robot voice and a real bad case of eczema, who is bent on winning his old girlfriend Wendy back from the lamest (ha! you'll get that pun later) version of Peter Pan you've ever met. Hook wraps up our #StephenStaleySummer, and we hope you had as much fun as we did!

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221. Snake Hotel

Thu, 30 Jul 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Without further ado, we present to you yet another reptilian treasure -- Snake Hotel. Imagine Squid Games with a North Korean(?) twist and just a pinch of "sensual mommy" issues, and you're halfway to what this one is all about. And don't let the action-packed movie poster fool you...this one was a bit of a slithery slog.

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220. Demonic Plastic Surgeon M.D.

Thu, 16 Jul 2026 00:01:00 -0400

It's another wild ride this week deep in the throes of our #StephenStaleySummer as we find out what happens when you accept free plastic surgery from a "doctor" with a vagina for a face. Spoiler alert: it's gross, and it involves old lady bjs (yes, that part surprised us, too). Come for the demonic seances, but stay for the third act plot twist you WON'T see coming!

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219. Dinosaur Prison

Thu, 09 Jul 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Sticking with our theme of murderous scaly friends, we now present you with Dinosaur Prison, and if you're asking yourself if the dinosaurs are the guards or the inmates...it's kind of both? It's complicated. But don't worry, Willy Wonka will explain everything (i.e. nothing). We're afraid to say more here because this prison break is something that needs to be seen to be believed, so join us as we continue #StephenStaleySummer and our #JusticeforJames campaign by covering this misunderstood beast.

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218. Croc!

Thu, 02 Jul 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Welcome to #JusticeforJames #StephenStaleySummer! We are kicking things off with exclusive coverage of the most anticipated wedding of the summer. If you thought Taylor Swift was throwing the best wedding party this weekend, you could not be more wrong and if you disagree, you can take it up with our new best friend, the crocodile lurking in the shadows of an old English manor just waiting to spoil a bride's day.

217. RE-RELEASE: Cinderella's Revenge

Thu, 25 Jun 2026 00:01:00 -0400

This week begins our official quest for #JUSTICE with a look back at Cinderella's Revenge, an alarmingly violent re-telling of the classic fairytale starring our best boy James as Elon Musk. Okay, "starring" may be overstating things, but at least he didn't get his nuts crushed in this one. Next week, we're rolling out a whole month of JAMES, and our fingers are crossed that his testicles are still intact by the end of it.

216. RE-RELEASE: Nutcracker Massacre

Thu, 18 Jun 2026 00:01:00 -0400

We know what you're thinking..."But Dawn & Lisa, Christmas is 6 months from now!" Well, guess what. #JusticeforJamesJuly starts in 2 weeks, and this is where it all began. In case you missed it, we watched this delightful holiday slasher in 2023, and we were gobsmacked and horrified by the senseless violence against good guy James by the titular nutcracker. So gobsmacked and horrified, in fact, that we have made it part of the mission of our podcast to get justice for James by viewing as many of his other ridiculous B-movies for our show as possible. So buckle up, because we are about to go on a journey with James!

215. RE-RELEASE: The Sand

Thu, 11 Jun 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Happy Summer, y'all! It's time to head on down to those white sandy beaches and get ate by a mysterious sand-dwelling jellyfish monster! Get in the seasonal spirit with our reflections on classic sci-fi adventure, The Sand, and maybe think twice about attending those crazy beach parties with "Vegas rules."

214. RE-RELEASE: The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Thu, 04 Jun 2026 13:49:12 -0400

We just reviewed Yorgos Linthimos' recent film, Bugonia, but if you were wondering what this man's other films look like, we have some great news for you. We covered Mr. Linthimos' 2017 (failed) attempt at cinematic mastery, and we're bringing it back out of the vault for your entertainment. The Killing of a Sacred Deer is one of those movies you just can't forget, for all the wrong reasons. So if you were disappointed by how little hate we were giving Yorgos in our discussion about Bugonia, this throwback episode is for you!

213. Hurry Up Tomorrow

Thu, 28 May 2026 00:01:00 -0400

If there is anything we are "Abel" to say with certainty after viewing this cinematic disaster, it is that The Weeknd must be stopped. Hurry Up Tomorrow is a hate crime against all human beings, and this is our official public plea to Barry Keoghan and Jenna Ortega to EXPLAIN THEMSELVES. Save yourselves the torture and let us tell you why this movie was nominated for multiple Razzies this year.

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212. Bugonia

Thu, 21 May 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Some surprising takes this week on what we assumed would be a hot, hot mess. A drastic improvement over our last encounter with Yorgos Lanthimos (check out Ep. 133 - The Killing of a Sacred Deer), Bugonia has made us question everything. What is real?? Is the Earth actually flat?? Who REALLY shot JFK?? Are the reptilians actually in charge of our government (honestly, preferable)?? Join us down the rabbit hole this week so you can have a little existential crisis of your own!

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211. Thrash

Thu, 14 May 2026 00:01:00 -0400

You know we're always down for a shark movie, but this one wasn't exactly noteworthy. Despite some nifty CGI effects and concerted attempts to show you what it looks like when the entire Atlantic Ocean invites itself over for dinner, Thrash is missing something but we can't put our fins on it...

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210. The Girl in the Pool

Thu, 07 May 2026 00:01:00 -0400

The wait is over! The lost episode is here! We FINALLY get around to expressing our thoughts and feelings on The Girl in the Pool, and was it worth the wait? You tell us.

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209. The Pickleball Exorcist

Thu, 30 Apr 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Well, friends, we’ve done it. We’ve reached a new low. In our 200 episodes, we have never seen ANYTHING quite like this, and with any luck, we never will again. The only thing more annoying than pickleballers talking about how much they love pickleball is this absolute disaster of a motion picture. With about 5 mediocre actors carrying a tissue-thin plot, The Pickleball Exorcist wastes no time, money, or effort bothering to make this thing watchable. We can only assume it was filmed on a 1999 Kyocera VP-210 by an individual with unlimited access to Party City’s excess inventory of severed body parts, because there is no other reasonable explanation for what just happened here. After this painful experience, we may hang up our jaunty Panama hats and switch careers to become part-time exorcists/moonlighting homicide detectives because frankly, it seems like a sweet gig. Happy Pickleball Month to everyone except the morons who made this movie!

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208. Bridgerton S4E8 - Dance in the Country

Thu, 23 Apr 2026 00:01:00 -0400

And they all lived happily ever after! Or did they? Of course, they did. This is Bridgerton. It's the season finale, so it's time for a wedding (as long as you stick around through the credits because apparently it wasn't important enough to include in the actual episode). Araminta gets a mild scolding in private for her hideous crimes, and we're somehow supposed to be cool with that, and...what's this?? A NEW Lady Whistledown is on the scene?? Who could it be? Guess you'll have to tune in again when we cover Season 5 in two years.

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207. Bridgerton S4E6&7 - The Passing Winter & The Beyond

Thu, 16 Apr 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Our prediction chickens are starting to come home to roost! The NEW Lady Penwood's identity is revealed. The Queen has a change of...whatever she has instead of a heart. Benedict makes an earth-shattering discovery (all because of a NECKLACE). And somebody gets engaged! Who could it be?? Tune in to find out! Also, April 16th is International Documentary Day, so stay with us to the end to hear our solid gold rec's for jaw-dropping documentaries you have to see to believe.

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206. Bridgerton S4E5 - Yes or No

Thu, 02 Apr 2026 00:01:00 -0400

Our little Bridgerton babies are all grown up! Gregory and Hyacinth steal the show this week with their adorable wide-eyed fascination around the delicate process of wooing a partner. Neither should be seeking advice from Benedict, however, as he needed both Will Mondrich AND his brothers to beat some sense into that beautifully smooth brain of his before he could make a move regarding Sophie. And what a move it is. There's no turning back now, especially with the Queen's unwitting spy lurking outside the door...

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205. Bridgerton S4E4 - An Offer From A Gentleman

Thu, 26 Mar 2026 00:01:00 -0400

For the love of God, will SOMEONE please slap some sense into Benedict?! The man still cannot put two and two together to realize who Sophi is, even though he has extra time to examine her now that she is a lady's maid in the Bridgerton home (another bright idea from Benedict). If you think that's bad enough, wait until you hear his indecent proposal...

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204. Bridgerton S4E3 - The Field Next to the Other Road

Thu, 19 Mar 2026 09:21:21 -0400

Things are heating up a bit in episode 3 with a little carriage sex and all this scandalous talk of pinnacles! Benedict and Sophie are even getting in on the fun with some casual nudity and a stolen kiss. But none of this is without its complications as the Maid Wars escalate, plunging the entire ton into chaos. We suspect there could be a convenient vacancy for Sophie somewhere close by where she can stay until Benedict finally uses his eyeballs and realizes who she is.

203. Bridgerton S4E2 - Time Transfixed

Thu, 12 Mar 2026 00:01:00 -0400

It's Episode 2, and we're pleased to announce that things are starting to cook. We get Sophie's tRaGiC bAcKsTorY, Benedict's spirited search for his mystery lady, and a side story involving the toxic friendship between Lady Danbury and the Queen. While we're happy to get the story moving along, there were a lot feelings going on this week that weren't very happily ever after. Will Benedict realize what's right in front of his stupid(handsome) face once he sobers up? Stay on our Bridgerton journey and find out with us next week!

202. Bridgerton S4E1 - The Waltz

Thu, 05 Mar 2026 00:01:00 -0500

Off to a slooooooooooow start this season despite finally getting Dawn's favorite Bridgerton boy in the spotlight. We're crossing our fingers that things are about to start heating up because cheesy masquerade balls and knock-off fairytale plots aren't quite doing it for us. Come along with us as we ONCE AGAIN follow a rake's metamorphosis into a respectable gentleman after meeting "the right woman." (eyeroll)

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201. Emily in Paris S5E9&10 - La Belle Époque & Veni, Vidi, Venezia

Thu, 26 Feb 2026 00:01:00 -0500

Just like so many of the men on this show, Season 5 promised A LOT and simply did not deliver. We will try to make this finale episode interesting for you all, but Emily did not make that easy for us. A botched non-proposal, a successful(?) proposal, and a deadbeat husband are our holy trinity of mindless drama this week, and we can't say that we're excited to see where Season 6 will take us after this. What we can say is that, somehow, all roads still lead to Gabriel...

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200. Emily in Paris S5E7&8 - Second Chances & Fashion Statement

Thu, 12 Feb 2026 00:01:00 -0500

It's all business in these episodes with a side of Pride. Marcello pops up in Paris with ambitions to start his own fashion line, and he somehow finds jobs for all of our main characters, which is going to make for pretty strange bedfellows. Mindy meddles in Emily's relationship with Marcello, Sylvie finds herself in a friendship faux pas, and does Julien finally have a love interest?? Now we love to see a Paris Pride parade, but here's your warning to shield your eyes from Emily's hideous wig.

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199. Emily in Paris S5E5&6 - Bonjour Paris! & The One Where Emily Goes to the Embassy

Thu, 05 Feb 2026 00:01:00 -0500

Ah, there's no place like home! While we are thrilled to be back in Paris, Emily is somewhat less enthusiastic given that her job has basically whittled down to controlling Antoine's ridiculous temper tantrums AND she finally discovers that all of her friends and colleagues have been lying to her about Mindy and Alfie's budding relationship. But one night of fireworks and Funions with fellow ex-pat Jake helps her realize that friendship conquers all (at least until she realizes she has a crush on him and the cycle begins again because if there's one thing we can count on from this show, it's zero character development).

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198. Emily in Paris S5E3&4 - Intimissimi Issues & Rome Has Fallen

Thu, 29 Jan 2026 00:01:00 -0500

In the wise, immortal and paraphrased words of Julien, Rome wasn't built in a day but it took Emily basically that long to destroy it. Although, to be fair, she had some help. Luc and his casual womanizing ways sink the Bavazza account, and newcomer Princess Gianna puts Solitano a little too much on the map and, with an assist from "precious genius" Giancarlo, ruins the company's future with Muratori. Marcello finally reveals HIS true colors (they are not nice), and with all this going on, we could not agree more that it is time to beat a hasty retreat to Paris before Genevieve manages to set what's left of the office on fire.

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197. Emily in Paris S5E1&2 - La Dolce Emily & Got To Be Real

Thu, 22 Jan 2026 00:01:00 -0500

We're back! We could never leave you, our precious listeners, to go through the trauma of a fifth season of Emily in Paris alone, so we have ended our hiatus and begun our glorious return to the airwaves to help you process this garbage. We are off to a bit of a slow start here in Season 5 with mostly recycled plotlines and yawn-worthy relationship drama, but we do see some storm clouds on the horizon (looking at you, Genevieve) so stick with us and we can weather it all together!

Thank you for your patience over the past year! While we do hate Emily, we love doing this podcast for you all, and we are so glad to be back.

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196. RE-RELEASE: Killer Sofa

Thu, 20 Feb 2025 00:01:00 -0500

You've heard us talk about it hundreds of times across our nearly 200 episodes. We have yet to find a movie that can top it. We've begged you to go back and listen to this episode, and now it's at the top of your feed so you have no excuse. IT'S KILLER SOFA! You'll laugh! You'll cry! You'll cry from laughing! If you love everything our podcast stands for, you will love this movie and this episode. It brings us great joy to share it with you all again.

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195. Sidelined: The QB & Me

Thu, 13 Feb 2025 00:01:00 -0500

If you thought this year's Super Bowl was boring, we challenge you to endure the 99 minutes of Sidelined: The QB & Me and then come talk to us. Formulaic, cheesy, and completely devoid of any real conflict, this fumble of a film misses the mark in every direction. (Shout outs to Drew Ray Tanner and James Van Der Beek for being our only salvation.) Tubi, we beg you, please stop making movies out of Wattpad fanfiction.

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194. The Estate

Thu, 06 Feb 2025 00:01:00 -0500

We dug up a hidden gem for y'all this week. The Estate is a surprisingly successful black comedy with brilliant acting and scriptwriting, and it is a refreshing change of pace from our usual fare. A famous face here and there adds a bit of spice, and the third act plot twist will both delight and astonish you. Can't recommend enough that you all check this one out!

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193. Cinderella's Revenge

Thu, 30 Jan 2025 00:01:00 -0500

We have to admit -- it takes a very creative mind to work excessive violence, S&M kink, and Elon Musk into a Cinderella story. But we also must ask the question, just because it can be done, does that mean it should be done? No. Unequivocally no. We're back to our regularly scheduled nonsense this week with Cinderella's Revenge, and while we weren't exactly impressed, it was a vast improvement over mega-snoozefest that was Megalopolis.

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192. Megalopolis

Thu, 23 Jan 2025 00:01:00 -0500

Of all the bullets we've taken for you, our precious listeners, this one has to be the biggest. Megalopolis promised A LOT and delivered...moving sidewalks. A star-studded cast and critically acclaimed director could not save this pretentious exercise of elitism from its own inaccessibility, and we learned that lesson repeatedly over the 138-minute run time. Save yourselves -- listen to our recap, if not simply so that our sacrifice was not made in vain.

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191. Subservience

Thu, 16 Jan 2025 00:01:00 -0500

Very few podcasts would dare to touch the controversial topics we cover in this episode, such as robot fluids, the line between infidelity and sex toys, and how anyone thought "Nick" was the appropriate name for Italian Stallion, Michele Morrone. We gave Megan Fox one more chance to change our minds, and even though we found her performance as an emotionless robot more believable than her other human characters, the whole movie falls flat in the wake of several other films and tv shows that have already done this premise and done it way better. Starting 2025 off strong with this one!

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190. RE-RELEASE - Till Death

Thu, 09 Jan 2025 00:01:00 -0500

Our search for Megan Fox's redemption continues! We're giving her as many chances as we can, including this 2021 horror/action flick, which didn't quite hit the mark but was a vast improvement over Midnight in the Switchgrass. If you think it's not cold enough outside these days (hello, polar vortex), check out our episode on Till Death, which will have you questioning exactly how much hypothermia a person can survive.

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189. RE-RELEASE: 365 Days

Thu, 02 Jan 2025 00:01:00 -0500

What better way to welcome the next 365 days on this planet than with a movie that can generously be described as a gratuitous sex montage? We are manifesting all things steamy and sexy for 2025, so buckle up for a new year of hate-watch movies with your favorite podcast girlies!

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188. It's A Wonderful Knife

Thu, 26 Dec 2024 00:01:00 -0500

To finish off both our holiday lineup AND the year of 2024, we are pleased to bring you "It's A Wonderful Knife," a criminally underrated Christmasy slasher film that filled us with hope for the entertainment industry. Despite a few minor imperfections, we both agreed that this film was a bit of stabby festive fun, and as Dawn will tell you, when you've got Justin Long, you can't go wrong.

Happy Holidays to all of our AMAZING listeners, and we hope to continue entertaining your earbuds in 2025!

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187. The Gingerdead Man 3: Saturday Night Cleaver

Thu, 19 Dec 2024 00:01:00 -0500

This week, we return for a third and final time to our favorite non-Christmasy Christmas franchise: The Gingerdead Man! If you thought the first two films were insane, you're still not adequately prepared for the nonsense going on here. Saturday Night Cleaver is the best kind of stupid from the Scientific Research Institute for the Study of Homicidal Baked Goods to the REAL story of what happened at Pearl Harbor, a day that will truly live in infamy after this revelation. We had a lot of fun with this one, and we think you all will, too!

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186. Our Little Secret

Thu, 12 Dec 2024 00:01:00 -0500

Wrapping up our coverage of the Lindsay Lohan Netflix movie trilogy, we are delighted to bring you feel-good, Christmas-adjacent Our Little Secret! A pleasant surprise of excellent casting, decent writing, and just enough heart-warming sincerity to avoid being cheesy, we're going to recommend that you all add this one to your holiday watch lists.

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185. The Merry Gentlemen

Thu, 05 Dec 2024 00:01:00 -0500

The holiday season is upon us and so is Netflix's avalanche of terrible Christmas rom-coms, and we are kicking off December with The Merry Gentlemen (think Magic Mike, but make it CHRISTMAS). Even Chad Michael Murray's bewitching V can't distract us from how dull and uninventive this movie is...okay, it distracted us A LITTLE BIT.

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184. RE-RELEASE: Uncut Gems

Thu, 28 Nov 2024 10:55:52 -0500

It's Turkey Day, y'all, and what better way to celebrate than by listening to our acclaimed recap of this absolute turkey of a film. Nothing gives Thanksgiving like a movie that is way too long and contains an absurd amount of screaming and f-bombs. Plus our strange queen Julia Fox is an inspiration as always. Happy Thanksgiving to all of our listeners! We appreciate you and how you've helped our podcast grow over the years.

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183. RE-RELEASE: Inheritance

Thu, 21 Nov 2024 00:01:00 -0500

As we approach Thanksgiving, it's good to have a reminder that no matter how much our families irritate us, they're not even half as bad as the one featured in this week's throwback flick, Inheritance. This year, we're thankful our dads didn't imprison some dude in a bunker and gift him to us upon their deaths. Oh, and we're thankful for all of YOU!

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182. RE-RELEASE: False Positive

Thu, 14 Nov 2024 00:01:00 -0500

Throwing it all the way back to the early days of I Hate It, Let's Watch It, this oldie but a goodie might be an all too timely reminder of the reproductive health crisis still relevant today...but let's focus on the questionable directing and plot holes that abound in False Positive instead.

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181. RE-RELEASE: Fall

Thu, 07 Nov 2024 00:01:00 -0500

Need a pick-me-up this week? Temporarily suspend the horrors of reality by revisiting our recap of 2022 Netflix original movie sensation, Fall. With a rumored sequel (how??) in the works, there's no better time than the present to find out what all the fuss was about.

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180. Benny Loves You

Thu, 31 Oct 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We’re celebrating Halloween this year with a movie that is decidedly more trick than treat, but we invite you to come on the journey with us and decide for yourself! Benny Loves You is the bastard spawn of Child’s Play and Toy Story, and while this film doesn’t have a serious bone in its body, it is absolutely ruthless and irreverent when it comes to storytelling. The cast of highly unlikeable characters is somewhat balanced out by our adorable, if not slightly stabby, villain, and despite all the innocent blood spilt along the way, we couldn’t help rooting for Benny, who just wanted to cuddle and play. Always remember, Benny loves you, and we do, too! Happy Halloween!

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179. Lisa Frankenstein

Thu, 24 Oct 2024 00:01:00 -0400

This campy, romantic spin on a classic monster tale is unexpectedly fun and delightful, or maybe our brains have just eroded so much this spooky season we can't tell up from down anymore. Set in the 80s purely for the vibes, Lisa Frankenstein finds its success in nostalgia, quirky humor, and A+ casting, not to mention the most creative repurposing of a tanning bed we've ever seen. Was it perfect? Hell no, we've got notes. But if you don't take it too seriously, we think you'll enjoy this one, too!

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178. Drive Thru

Thu, 17 Oct 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Welcome to Hella Burger, home of the Hella Burger, can Horny take your order? While this movie certainly has its issues with storytelling, Drive Thru totally nails the vibe of being a high school student in the mid-2000s. Especially if your parents were assholes who bullied a kid TO DEATH and that kid came back in the form of a fast food restaurant mascot to get his revenge on you. Such a universal pubescent experience, we're feeling so nostalgic.

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177. Suitable Flesh

Thu, 10 Oct 2024 00:01:00 -0400

This week on the I Hate It, Let's Watch It: Spooky Season lineup, we have Suitable Flesh, and if you guessed that the featured monster of this horror flick would be a sex-crazed, body-swapping octopus demon, well, we're impressed. And we want to be friends. Heather Graham shines in this fairly predictable but stabbalicious thriller, and if we had only gotten a bit less gore and a lot more lore, it might have been more satisfying. But if you're looking for the juiciest decapitation we've ever seen or enjoy a little knife play in the bedroom, this is the film for you!

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176. Attack of the Lederhosen Zombies

Thu, 03 Oct 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We're kicking off spooky season with Austria's first (and hopefully only) zombie movie that dares to ask the question...what if a snowmaking machine didn't make snow, but made zombies instead? If that sounds like a bad business plan to you, you'd be correct, and weirdly enough, it also makes for a bad movie. With 99% of the film's budget going straight to fake bloody viscera and bumpy skin growths, it's the script and plot that suffer most as we join this cast of mostly bland and unlikeable characters on their alpine misadventure. But the movie doesn't take itself too seriously, so we'll give it two out of five spleens.

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175. Emily in Paris S4E9&10 - Roman Holiday & All Roads Lead to Rome

Thu, 26 Sep 2024 00:01:00 -0400

As the saying goes, all good things must come to an end and in our case, all bad things as well, which is why we haven't lost our minds (yet). It's the end of Season 4 of Emily in Paris and the end of our Parisian-centric episodes, but we're seeing more international destinations in our future so we can't be too sad about it. Are Emily and Gabriel over for good? Will Genevieve succeed in...whatever devious thing she's planning to do? What is Emily in Paris without Paris? Let us talk you through it all on our finale recap!

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174. Emily in Paris S4E6&7&8 - Last Christmas & Lost In Translation & Back on the Crazy Horse

Thu, 19 Sep 2024 00:01:00 -0400

It's Christmas in Paris, and no one is getting what they want this year. Emily gets ditched on a ski slope, Sylvie gets a new roommate/employee in the form of Laurent's sketchy daughter from a previous relationship, and babies around the world will be getting rattles full of Maison Lavaux perfume in their stockings, so literally no one is happy, especially us. It's time to find out what Genevieve is really up to and if Emily will decide to ditch Gabriel and Paris for Rome and her new love interest, Marcello...Join us next week for some celebratory champagne and the Season 4 finale!

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173. Savoring Paris

Thu, 12 Sep 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We hope you're not lactose intolerant because while Savoring Paris pretends to be a rom-com about an American woman searching for fulfillment and a grumpy Frenchman waiting for a second chance at love, it's actually a film about cheese. The plot, the scenery, the smells, the drama -- cheese is at the center of it all. While you better brie-lieve we love a gouda romance movie, this one falls just a bit short of the mark due to its Hallmark Channel AI-generated storylines. Still, there's something charming about our main characters and their cheesy puns, which is more than we can say for Emily in Paris. Speaking of which, stay tuned to the end of the episode where we briefly discuss our thoughts on the trailer for Emily in Paris, Season 4 Part 2 to get you prepped and ready for our recaps resuming next week!

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172. Under Paris

Thu, 05 Sep 2024 00:01:00 -0400

When Stephen King takes to Twitter to declare a Netflix original shark movie with an objectively questionable premise "really quite good," you HAVE to vet it. So, we did. And we're here to tell you that it was, in fact, NOT quite good. It was actually quite bad, and we have the math to prove it. Without a strong core mission to hold it all together, Under Paris flails about in the water for 104 minutes before simply giving up and sinking to the bottom of the Seine where it belongs. Still, we enjoyed following the journey of our dynamic diva of a lead, and we wish her all the best as new mayor of Paris (just to be clear, we're talking about our shark queen, Lilith; not the should-be-dead-in-the-first-five-minutes conservation scientist, Sophia.) #TEAMLILITH

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171. Emily in Paris S4E4&5 - The Grey Area & Trompe l'oeil

Thu, 29 Aug 2024 00:01:00 -0400

This week, we're wrapping up our coverage of Part 1 of Emily in Paris, and, man, have the discussion topics changed since last time. In classic EiP fashion, we're abruptly moving on from central plotlines like Alfie, Sylvie's survivor story, and pretty much everything we were worried about in the first three episodes to a bunch of things we didn't want to be worried about because we thought they were resolved. Emily's Three's Company living situation takes yet another turn, and Mindy appears to be on the precipice of rekindling things with Benoit. Poor Luc is getting abused by his girlfriend AND the writers, and we just want justice for everyone except Emily.

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170. Emily in Paris S4E1&2&3 - Break Point & Love on the Run & Masquerade

Thu, 22 Aug 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We're off to a rough start here in Season 4 of Emily in Paris, but buckle up because we're in it for the long haul. Between the tired love triangles, the cliched sit-com moments, and the inexplicable personality pivots, we're scared to see what the rest of Part 1 will bring us. Only one person can save us from this assured destruction, and it is our queen, Sylvie Grateau. (Okay, fine, two people -- can't forget our beloved Luc).

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169. Emily in Paris - Season 3 Recap

Thu, 15 Aug 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Ready or not, here she comes! Emily Cooper is BACK, which means we are freebasing champagne to prepare for yet another season of her ridiculous antics, but before we dive head-first into brand new chaos, we're here to get you caught up on all the Season 3 tea. Where did we leave off with Emily, Gabriel, Alfie, Mindy, and all our favorite Savoir pals?? Plus, we dissect the trailer for Season 4 and make some predictions, which is easier than it should be because this show has a habit of just staying exactly the same. Join us on our latest journey and look for our upcoming coverage of Season 4 of Emily in Paris!

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168. A Family Affair

Thu, 08 Aug 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Depending on which one of your lovely podcast hosts you ask, this movie was either full-on CRINGE or unexpectedly amusing. But what we can agree on is that this movie was too long, Nicole Kidman was miscast, "Zara" was the wrong name for Joey King, and the film should have been released with Hallmark Channel's Christmas line-up. Let us know what YOU thought about this one on our socials!

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167. Space Cadet

Thu, 01 Aug 2024 00:01:00 -0400

DUDE! THIS MOVIE FRIGGIN' SUCKED! Offensive to all kinds of groups (astronauts, Floridians, people with nine toes, and basically anyone with more than two brain cells), Space Cadet spreads the dangerous message that all it takes is a total lack of self-awareness and a sprinkle of creative thinking to become an astronaut. This one misses the mark by a lightyear due to its unreasonable demand that the audience forgo all logical thinking and its failure to deliver a satisfying, emotional core that brings the whole thing together. Also, bad CGI, cringey dialogue, and questionable costume design -- our favorites!

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166. Mother of the Bride

Thu, 18 Jul 2024 00:01:00 -0400

The movie equivalent of a Kardashian, Mother of the Bride is pretty to look at but DAAAMN, SHE BE DUMB! Jam packed with succulent eye candy (Brooke Shields, Benjamin Bratt, CHAD MICHAEL MURRAY) and the stunning backdrop of Thailand, you'd think this 90-minute Netflix rom-com would be a cute and funny yet profound study on what sexuality and relationships mean to women as they age, but you would be absolutely incorrect. What we get instead is a very confused, super cliched, seen-it-a-million-times film that is completely devoid of an emotional core (and Chad Michael Murray...seriously, the man is only in approx 8 minutes of this movie and we are currently in the midst of suing Netflix for this egregious mistake). JUSTICE FOR LUCAS!

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165. Bridgerton S3E8 - Into the Light

Thu, 11 Jul 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We've reached the end of our Bridgerton project (for now), and there are both celebrations (primarily from Lisa) and tears (exclusively from Dawn). We'll give you all the tea on whether Cressida decided to take the high road; whether Colin could put his hot air balloon-sized ego aside long enough to let Penelope clean up her own messes; and, if Francesca and John's wedding really went as smoothly as it seemed... And that's a wrap on Bridgerton until Season 4 drops in two years! But if you had fun on this journey with us, you should check out our upcoming coverage of equally cringe movies and shows, including (but not limited to) Emily in Paris, Space Cadet, Mother of the Bride, and more to come! Stay tuned!

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164. Bridgerton S3E7 - Joining of Hands

Thu, 04 Jul 2024 00:01:00 -0400

It's the "Pen"-ultimate episode of Season 3, and Lady Whistledown's situation is more precarious than ever. Can Penelope convince Colin to become Lord Whistledown or must she accept her fate as "just a Bridgerton," which (let's be real, girl) is not the end of the world? Will Cressida send the whole house of cards toppling to the ground for a shot at a better life? Will the Mondriches snub yet ANOTHER invitation to tea in some weird, misguided power play -- Just kidding, we don't give a crap about them and we will not waste more than 90 seconds of your valuable time discussing them. It's all up for debate for at least one more week until we bring you the exciting (?) conclusion of Bridgerton: Season 3!

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163. Bridgerton S3E5&6 - Tick Tock & Romancing Mr. Bridgerton

Thu, 27 Jun 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Apologies, dear listeners, for the unexpected delay in bringing these latest episodes to you but we assure you that it was worth the wait! All hell is breaking loose in the world of Bridgerton as pressure is building on Lady Whistledown to reveal herself and we suddenly have not one but two couples ready to take that stroll down the aisle. If this show knows how to do anything correctly, it's how to make a goddamn mess out of anything that is going smoothly, so we're bracing ourselves for the needlessly dramatic conclusion sure to come.

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162. Bridgerton S3E4 - Old Friends

Thu, 13 Jun 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We're halfway through the season and all of Colin and Penelope's building sexual tension finally comes to head...or should we say, a finger? (Or two.) It's zero to sixty from a diddle in the carriage to a ring on the finger, but who cares how we got there once we get there? With four episodes to go, we await the inevitable second act twist in which Lady Whistledown must reveal her secret. We're also looking forward to Cressida's potential redemption arc, Francesca and John exchanging perhaps four or five words at a time, and discovering what the beef is between Lady Danbury and her dashing brother Marcus. All this to come in our next installments of The Bridgerton Project! Stay with us! There's safety in numbers!

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161. Bridgerton S3E3 - Forces of Nature

Thu, 06 Jun 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Despite inflating our hopes last week with that steamy kiss, Mission Polination slows down this week to the pace of an escaping hot air balloon. And speaking of hot air, both Cressida and Penelope are full of it as they compete for Lord Debling's affections, and we get nothing but air from Francesca, who finds her soulmate in John Stirling and simply breathes in his presence for a few moments before excusing herself to go home early. Damn, this show is sexy.

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160. Bridgerton S3E2 - How Bright the Moon

Thu, 30 May 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Things take a turn for the worse this week as Penelope is forced to out her own charm school scandal in Lady Whistledown and we discover that the Featherington sisters know even less about making babies than Daphne Bridgerton, which is...an accomplishment. But there's a sliver of hope for all you Polinators out there because our featured couple FINALLY does something besides air sharing and longing glances across a crowded room...

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159. Bridgerton S3E1 - Out of the Shadows

Thu, 23 May 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Break out your antihistamines, gentle listeners, because it's Polin season on Bridgerton! We may have accidentally taken a drowsy formula because so far, Episode 1 has threatened to put us right to sleep. The only thing putting a pep in our step at this stage is Colin's inexplicable glow-up and Portia Featherington's determination to get buns in her daughters' ovens ASAP. Otherwise, we'll just be waiting here patiently for the whole Lady Whistledown situation to blow up in Penelope's face, though we won't be holding our breath...

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158. Bridgerton, S2 E5-8

Thu, 16 May 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We made it to the finish line of what can only be described as both a marathon AND a sprint -- Fair listeners, we bring you the final installment of Bridgerton, Season 2, just in time for the drop of Season 3! We'll get you all caught up on Kate and Anthony (will they or won't they??), the most scandalous Featherington scam to date (trade rubies for palladium and it's basically a Hiram Lodge fanfiction), and is Lady Whistledown about to be unmasked?? Don't miss this final recap before we get ready to dive into the newest season of Bridgerton, which we will selflessly continue to cover for all you incomparable diamonds out there.

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157. Bridgerton, S2 E1-4

Thu, 09 May 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Mamma mia, here we go again. A little deja vu to start the second season of Bridgerton, as we get introduced to several new characters whose names we will struggle to remember as well as a number of perfectly reasonable misunderstandings that will surely lead to heartbreak and drama in the second half. Still, if there's one thing we can say with absolute certainty at this point (something we never thought we'd say at this stage in Season 1), it's that Anthony Bridgerton must be protected at all costs, muttonchops or no muttonchops!

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156. Bridgerton S1 E5-8

Thu, 02 May 2024 00:01:00 -0400

And just like that, we are wrapping up Season 1 of Bridgerton, and let's just say, we had some THOUGHTS. Despite having just over 4 hours of show time, we are unsure of what we accomplished here in the second half of this first season besides a ton of parties, several man-child hissy fits, and a (possible) murder??? Oh, and we also found out who Lady Whistledown is, and if you want to know, too, you'll just have to listen and find out.

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155. Bridgerton, S1 E1-4

Thu, 25 Apr 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Oh, god -- it's happening. We're doing it. That's right, people. It is finally time for us to sink our teeth into the Netflix sensation known as Bridgerton. Our ambitious goal is to get fully up to speed on the first two seasons by the time Season 3 premieres in May, so hold on to your feathered hats because here we go! In Part 1 of our series, we get into the Who's Who of this cast of MANY similar-looking characters and summarize the events of the first 4 episodes of Season 1. So, if you're new to Bridgerton or you're a devoted fan who needs a refresher before starting Season 3 next month, join us on this delightfully succinct, strictly need-to-know recap journey. xoxo the Ladies Whistledown

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154. The Strays

Thu, 18 Apr 2024 00:01:00 -0400

If you're looking for a creative writing prompt, we recommend you watch The Strays and then write a novel to fill in all the blanks because this movie leaves quite a bit to the imagination. Perhaps if they had spent less time on itchy scalps, late-night Chinese food orders, and the most awkward game of Scrabble you've ever seen, we might be more satisfied with the story being told. But alas, here we are again...just scratching our heads.

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153. Shattered

Thu, 11 Apr 2024 00:01:00 -0400

One of the best "How NOT To" guides we've ever seen on how to rob a millionaire, Shattered is going to teach you everything you don't want to do on your next Robin Hood-inspired adventure, starting with rule #1: Leave your stepfather OUT OF IT. And if you don't feel like watching the entire thing, just check out the two-minute trailer, which manages to spoil pretty much every plot twist that might have made this movie interesting...and then come listen to us fill you in on the rest (of which, there is not much).

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152. The Lost Daughter

Thu, 04 Apr 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Should have called this movie The Lost Plot, because we sure as hell couldn't find it. The movie shamelessly teased us with the promise of an exciting plot twist or a dangerous encounter only to give us...a worm. And an appreciation for our own mothers, who could never even come close to the insanely selfish matriarchs featured in The Lost Daughter. What a snoozefest. Save yourself some time, and just listen to us tell you about it.

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151. The Bunnyman Massacre

Thu, 28 Mar 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Hop on board the crazy train with us this Easter and give this eggs-ellent movie a chance! What more do you need to celebrate the most solemn and holy high holiday of the Catholic religion than an elementary school bus massacre, a token pair of fake breasts (that bait you into thinking this might be a sexy movie -- it's not), and a mentally unstable man in a bunny suit with an unlimited arsenal of weapons? All of that has to be in the Bible somewhere. And if you like this movie, apparently it's the second movie in a trilogy, so good luck with the rest of them.

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150. Irish Wish

Thu, 21 Mar 2024 00:01:00 -0400

We've said it before, we'll say it again: We are HERE for Lindsay Lohan's comeback. And while Irish Wish might have SOME flaws (i.e. confusing lore, total lack of chemistry between almost all of the characters, a criminally underutilized Jane Seymour, and corny rom-com tropes), Lindsay and her uber-charming opposite played by Ed Speleers save this film from being total garbage. Be careful what you wish for -- because regardless of what it is, St. Bridgette is gonna do whatever the hell she wants.

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149. Polaroid

Thu, 14 Mar 2024 00:01:00 -0400

Ahh, a movie that finally dares to posit the question...if most people are afraid of the dark, why not make the entire movie dark? Like, SO DARK that they can't even see the ACTUAL scary things that are going on. It's brilliant. It's bold. It's impossible to watch within a one-mile radius of a light source. So close your eyes and let us guide you through the poorly lit journey that is Polaroid, a movie about voodoo photography that never quite...develops into its full potential.

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148. RE-RELEASE: Deep Water

Thu, 07 Mar 2024 00:01:00 -0500

Now that we're all nice and turned on by our sexy February line-up, we'd like to keep the spice levels high with a movie that features graphic snail sex and 45 seconds of Jacob Elordi. That's right. You're WELCOME. One of our favorites from the archives, Deep Water is a must-see and if you're not convinced, you will be by the end of this episode.

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147. Leap Year

Thu, 29 Feb 2024 00:01:00 -0500

Forget Valentine's Day -- Leap Year is obviously the sexiest, most romantic holiday of them all, and we have the movie to prove it. This film has it all: zero nudity, zero sex, and zero chemistry, plus enough tired rom com tropes you could choke to death on them. Even Dawn's "favorite" leading lady, Amy Adams, can't save this excruciating nothingburger from boring us to tears, so forgive us while we Irish goodbye the heck out of here.

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146. Wild Things

Thu, 22 Feb 2024 00:01:00 -0500

We're closing out our ~threesome~ of sexy February movies with the 1998 classic erotic thriller, Wild Things, only one of us found this movie erotic or thrilling (hint: it's Dawn). While we did not necessarily agree on whether or not this was a good movie worthy of praise, we definitely agreed on this: Bill Murray carried this whole film on his back (with a not-so-modest assist from Denise Richards' breasts). If you followed along with us on our ménage a trois of sexy picks this month, be sure to stick around to the end of this episode to hear which was our favorite! We'll see you in the Leap Year!

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145. Happy Ending

Thu, 15 Feb 2024 00:01:00 -0500

If you were thinking about suggesting a threesome to your partner this Valentine's Day because you are sexually dissatisfied with your relationship and are unwilling to talk to them about it, THINK AGAIN. Just like having a baby to save a failing marriage, this is a BAD PLAN and if you don't want to take our word for it, watch Happy Ending. This dull and cringe-worthy slog of a movie is far worse than a mildly uncomfortable conversation with your partner, and you're much more likely to get an orgasm out of the latter. Happy Valentine's Day, y'all! And for the love of god, communicate with your partners!

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144. Burning Betrayal

Thu, 08 Feb 2024 00:01:00 -0500

We are kicking off our February Love Fest with a BANG. Well, technically many, MANY bangs. In our lifelong quest to find a film that can match the ridiculousness and steaminess of the 365 Days saga, we have discovered Burning Betrayal, which makes a valiant effort despite ultimately falling a bit short in the end. However, there is NO shortage of perfect butts, perfect breasts, and steamy sex scenes that MAY cause you to spew all over the place. So if you are looking to spice up your Valentine's Day (and not have to dwell too long on shady backstories and that pesky thing known as plot), give Burning Betrayal a shot and maybe keep your favorite personal massager within arm's reach...

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143. Killer Condom

Thu, 01 Feb 2024 00:01:00 -0500

Germany's answer to cult classic (and one of our favorite films that we've covered) Teeth, Killer Condom is a cautionary tale about what happens when religious fanatics coopt the prophylactic industry to clean up the streets of New York City just in time for Jesus Christ's second coming. We wish we were kidding. "Cum" on this journey with us as we detail Detective Luigi Mackaroni's tireless efforts to discover the truth behind these toothy Baby Bottle Pop tops and their insatiable desire for red jelly.

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142. The Ice Cream Truck

Thu, 25 Jan 2024 00:01:00 -0500

I scream, you scream, we all scream because what the heck was THAT?? The Ice Cream Truck, which unfortunately does not feature a serial killer transformer and therefore does not live up to its name, is actually a surprise movie about a mid-life crisis interrupted by fever dream sequences of murder, playground sex with an 18-year-old who actually looks like he's 45, and an ending that will have you wondering...was it all just a ~DeAdLy iLLuSioN~???

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141. Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death

Thu, 18 Jan 2024 00:01:00 -0500

If you're looking for a movie from the 80s that can mansplain feminism to you, look no further than Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death! This tongue-in-cheek take on gender stereotypes (written, directed, and produced entirely by MEN) has a lot to say about avocados, but gets tangled up in the vines of the Southern California jungle when it comes to advocating for women's rights. It's almost as if casting Bill Maher as a lovable, misogynistic doofus to make light of things like harassment and assault through Mel Brooks-style comedy was a bad idea? But what do we know? We're just a couple of silly Bunnies.

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140. RE-RELEASE - Deadly Illusions

Thu, 04 Jan 2024 09:07:13 -0500

What better way to kick of 2024 than by throwing it back to the very first movie we ever covered, a thrilling piece of cinematic art called Deadly Illusions. Kristen Davis is...baffling, the plot is...confused, and all these years later, we still can't make heads or tails of that ending.

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139. The Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust

Thu, 28 Dec 2023 00:01:00 -0500

Nothing gets us in the holiday spirit more than a horny cookie. In this non-Gary Busey sequel, the bar drops even LOWER for plot, acting, and puppets. There are satanic rituals, disgruntled "Hollywood" set employees, and a virgin sacrifice, and if you think we can tell you what it all means, well...that's your mistake. Hope everyone enjoyed the holidays, and we wish you all a very Happy New Year!

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138. RE-RELEASE - The Gingerdead Man

Thu, 21 Dec 2023 10:11:22 -0500

We hope you're enjoying the holiday season because we're about to ruin it by reminding you that this movie exists. If you're looking for something to listen to while you travel over the river and through the woods to grandmother's house, why not re-live the trauma we exposed you to last Christmas with our coverage of The Gingerdead Man, starring Gary Busey and the thinnest plot available to script writers! And if this isn't enough to get you feeling all Christmasey inside, tune back in next week for the greatly anticipated (by no one) sequel -- The Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust!

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137. Silent Night, Fatal Night

Thu, 14 Dec 2023 00:01:00 -0500

If you’re looking for a super intense and suspenseful Christmas thriller, Silent Night Fatal Night is NOT IT. Featuring the dullest female protagonist to ever disgrace our screens, the most incompetent sheriff in law enforcement history, and a kidnapping that a lot of people would consider a luxurious vacation, Lifetime’s latest holiday movie fails to convince us that anyone is in danger of dying here (except perhaps from boredom). A reimagining of Stephen King’s Misery gone horribly wrong, there was only one fatality this night, and it was our dignity.

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136. Nutcracker Massacre

Thu, 07 Dec 2023 00:01:00 -0500

You’re all gonna go NUTS for our first holiday movie of the season. Nutcracker Massacre is a sloppy delight, despite not living up to Dawn’s definition of a massacre. Come get lost in the lore with us as we attempt to make sense of this movie’s scant plot and why Clara’s Auntie Marie is explicably American in an otherwise English family. Grab your nuts (#justiceforJames) and settle in for some festive tomfoolery at the hands of a six-foot tall demon nutcracker with a taste for blood…and Gushers.

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135. Hatching

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 00:01:00 -0500

This movie doesn't eggsactly go...over easy, and your brain might feel a bit ~scrambled~ by the time it's over, but the yolk's on us because we're the ones who picked it to watch for the podcast. (Sorry not sorry for all the egg puns.) Hatching is an unexpectedly terrifying watch with disturbing bird-to-human transformations, the dreaded Mom-fluencer, and a surprising amount of goo.

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134. The Lie

Thu, 16 Nov 2023 00:01:00 -0500

Hey, y'all, remember when you were a teenager and your estranged parents sent you to ballet camp to teach you discipline but INSTEAD you decided to rebel and confess to committing a murder, which forces them to work together to cover for you and fall in love along way? No? Just us? Might be hard to relate to this one then. Let us walk you through the wildest reimagining of The Parent Trap we've ever seen and help you understand at the very least that Joey King understood the assignment.

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133. The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Thu, 09 Nov 2023 00:01:00 -0500

Holy moly, it's been a long time since we've had a doozy like this. The awkward dialogue, the wooden acting, the lack of any appropriate reactions to completely bizarre scenarios -- it's all coming together to make one of the worst cinematic gumbos we've had the misfortune to experience (so far, anyway). We don't recommend viewing The Killing of a Sacred Deer, but we DO recommend listening to our recap instead because y'all need to hear about this one.

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132. RE-RELEASE - Malignant

Thu, 02 Nov 2023 09:35:41 -0400

As a special Halloween treat (or trick, depending on how you feel about our content), we are re-releasing our 2021 Spooky Season feature on Malignant! If you're not ready to let go of Halloween just yet, grab some candy and join us as we revisit one of the wildest movie twists we've covered on the podcast.

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131. Slotherhouse

Thu, 26 Oct 2023 08:19:11 -0400

Our fourth and final movie of Spooky Season 2023 features an exceptionally annoying female main character, a metric butt-ton of sorority girl stereotypes, and an animatronic sloth with a bad haircut. Slotherhouse is either a delight or a snoozefest, depending on which of your lovely podcast hosts you believe, but what we can all agree on is that there are few things in this world more ridiculous than a homicidal sloth. Happy Halloween to all of our amazing listeners! Treat yourself by checking out all of our spooky October episodes available wherever you stream your podcasts!

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130. Fair Play

Thu, 19 Oct 2023 00:01:00 -0400

For Week 3 of Spooky Season, we bring you an erotic thriller titled Fair Play that is neither erotic nor thrilling. However, the frighteningly accurate portrayal of a man’s reaction when things don’t go his way could actually be spookier than any ghost or goblin this Halloween. We cover a lot of whiny babies on this podcast, but nothing is worse than this petulant man-child. But does he get what he deserves? Come listen and find out!

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129. Nowhere

Thu, 12 Oct 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Our second feature film of Spooky Season is for all our claustrophobes, thalassophobes, and tokophobes. Good luck to y’all with this one. Join us on the edge of our seat as we talk through this absolutely insane survival story which essentially boils down to a one-woman, two-hour bottle episode that gets a whole lot worse before remotely getting better. If you’re prone to queasiness, you’ve been warned. First 100 listeners get a lifetime supply of Tupperware!

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128. Slaxx

Thu, 05 Oct 2023 09:32:13 -0400

Run -- don't walk -- to your nearest CCC store because their latest Super Shaper jeans are (literally) JUMPING off the shelves! If you want to get your hands on (or eaten by) these GMO masterpieces, you'd better be first in line for the exclusive launch event that will definitely NOT turn into a bloodbath faster than you can say "end stage capitalism." On the surface, Slaxx looks like it's just your average movie about killer pants, but it has an important message about child labor and holding onto grudges so hard, everyone forgets the message. Welcome to spooky season! Come join us as we debrief this wild ride about haunted jeans!

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127. Obsession, Part 4

Thu, 28 Sep 2023 00:01:00 -0400

It's the finale you've all been waiting for, and we can honestly say, we did NOT see that one coming. We've talked about some horrible fathers on this podcast, but William might just take "Dad of the Year" for this bullshit. Thanks for coming on this mini-journey with us! Everyone stay safe out there and wash your goddamn pillows.

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126. Obsession, Part 3

Thu, 21 Sep 2023 00:01:00 -0400

So far, the most unbelievable part of this Netflix miniseries that asks us to accept that a father would have no issue seducing his daughter-in-law-to-be is that no one seems to have noticed that said father is acting SUSPICIOUS AF. It's only getting worse the closer we get to the end, and you know what, maybe everyone deserves what they get at this point for being so freakin' stupid. Will Jay and Anna make it down the aisle? Does William's dick explode and kill everyone around him before the secret is exposed? Does anyone get to have a happy ending?? Join us next week for the final part of OBSESSION and let's find out together!

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125. Obsession, Part 2

Thu, 14 Sep 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Warning: This episode contains discussions of nonconsensual sex acts perpetrated on a decorative pillow. If that's not convincing enough for you to tune in, we're not sure there's anything else we can say.

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124. Obsession, Part 1

Thu, 07 Sep 2023 00:01:00 -0400

If you thought Riverdale was the show with the absolute WORST parents, we invite you to come along on THIS ride with us. The first episode of Netflix's miniseries Obsession features one deeply unhinged father and his wildly inappropriate fixation on his son's girlfriend, and that's all we care to say about it here because you really have to get into this one with us to experience the full BANANAS effect.

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123. Riverdale S7E20 - Goodbye, Riverdale

Fri, 01 Sep 2023 00:01:00 -0400

While we might not be sad to see the end of Season 7, we feel a bit differently about the end of Riverdale as a whole. It's a show that sparked our podcast and our friendship, and even though the last couple of seasons have been rough, the bad moments don't erase the good. Riverdale was never able to recapture the magic of those first couple of seasons -- in fact, it seemed to get further and further away from its own heart -- but man, it was a WILD ride and definitely gave us something to talk about. This one is especially for all you loyalists out there like us who stuck with this runaway train all the way to hell and back. Goodbye, Riverdale, and thank you for everything.

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122. Riverdale S7E19 - The Golden Age of Television

Tue, 22 Aug 2023 00:01:00 -0400

With only two chances left to make things right, this penultimate episode of Riverdale takes a gigantic step back, right off a cliff. Despite this 7th season being set up from the beginning as a quest to return to the present day Riverdale we know and love(ish), Tabitha comes back to crush that dream and condemn us all to a finale in the 50s. With seemingly no more Barchie vs. Varchie, no more adult baby Anthony, and no more Foni/Kevin/Cheryl love quadrangle, what even is the point?? We're holding out the tiniest sliver of hope that the finale can answer that question and assure us that we haven't wasted our time. Don't miss our finale episode coming out next Friday, September 1st! We'll obviously discuss the Season 7 finale, but we'll also take you down memory lane a la Angel Tabitha and talk about some of the great moments, some of the worst moments, and Dawn will probably cry. It's time to close the chapter, and we're ready to turn the page.

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121. Riverdale S7E18 - For A Better Tomorrow

Tue, 15 Aug 2023 00:01:00 -0400

As they say, it's a numbers game, and this week, Riverdale finally gave us something worth talking about. It took 18 episodes, but For A Better Tomorrow reminds us of exactly why we are still here watching this train wreck so many years later. Crazy plot twists, unfathomably complicated conspiracy schemes, and the glue that holds this whole town together -- PALLADIUM. It's all there, and we love to see it. If you're like us and have been missing that classic I-don't-know-what-the-fuck-is-going-on-but-I-love-it Riverdale feeling, you'll enjoy this nostalgic reminder of why we watch.

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120. Riverdale S7E17 - A Different Kind of Cat

Tue, 08 Aug 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Riverdale really be testing us with a Veronica-centric episode this close to the end. Not to mention Archie's apple-based seduction, the return of Vughead (barf), and our weekly reminder that Fangs needs to get famous in a hurry. Our only shining light here is an unexpected partnership between Betty and Cheryl with each one helping the other to embrace their sexuality. Enjoy our short and sweet recap which is surely a better use of your time than actually watching Season 7's slow death. Only three episodes to go!!!

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119. Riverdale S7E15&16 - Miss Teen Riverdale & Stag

Tue, 01 Aug 2023 00:01:00 -0400

It's a Dawn & Lisa Double Digest for this week's episode of Riverdale recapping! Hot button issues include the questionable selection of judges for a beauty pageant featuring teenage girls, Alice's wildly (if not consistently) unethical parenting strategies, a rogue musical number, and the unwelcome resurrection of Vughead. Join us as we continue to ignore anything remotely important or plot-worthy and instead focus on the insipid drivel of high school students because that's just where we're at these days.

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118. The Idol

Tue, 18 Jul 2023 00:01:00 -0400

We interrupt our regularly scheduled Riverdale recaps to bring you one of the most controversial new shows of 2023 -- HBO's The Idol. If there was an Oscar for Most Criminally Squandered Premise, this show would take the cake. Pieces of plot keep trying to shine through, but they are quickly extinguished by the Weeknd's rat tail and Lily-Rose Depp's nipples. Despite our best efforts, we couldn't explain this one but damn it, we spent almost two hours trying. If anyone can help us figure out why this happened, please get in touch via our social media so we can start sleeping through the night again.

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117. Riverdale S7E14 - Archie the Musical

Tue, 11 Jul 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Well, kids, it's finally here -- the LAST Riverdale musical episode we will ever have to endure, and let's just say...it met our low expectations. Basically, Kevin and Clay decided to write an entire original musical based on the fact that Archie is incapable of making decisions, and they're shocked when it doesn't go over well with anyone. Between the flawed premise, the half-assed attempt at an emotional side plot for Kevin, and bizarre out-of-left-field sexual tension with Veronica and Betty, this haphazard performance missed the mark once again, and we can confidently say that Riverdale should have never experimented in this genre in the first place.

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116. Riverdale S7E13 - The Crucible

Tue, 04 Jul 2023 00:01:00 -0400

It's commies, cameos, and comic books on this week's episode of Riverdale! Suddenly, our favorite small town is apparently CRAWLING with communist sympathizers, including guest star Hiram Lodge, who has been caught consorting with...Videl Mastro...yeah, we can't get over that one, either. And Clifford Blossom, the only real red scare that exists in Riverdale, continues his campaign against sexual deviants in the name of patriotism. And the war on comic books reaches a dramatic climax, but do we really care at this point?

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115. Riverdale S7E12 - After the Fall

Tue, 27 Jun 2023 00:01:00 -0400

We're back with more Riverdale, and Riverdale is back with more meaningless musical numbers crowbarred in where they don't belong and examples of extremely abusive parenting that should be prosecuted by a governing authority but are instead "resolved" with a stern lecture! But it's fine because we ALSO get...absolutely nowhere with the Milkman investigation. Plus, we get an answer to question we've all been asking: who has the biggest dick in Riverdale???

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114. Riverdale S7E11 - Halloween II

Tue, 13 Jun 2023 00:01:00 -0400

If Riverdale can time travel back into the 1950s, then we guess they're allowed to celebrate Halloween in June. There's a little something for everyone in this variety show including a tasteless zombie burlesque musical number, a mysterious late-night milk delivery, more horny Betty, and a stabby stab MURDER??

P.S. We apologize for the audio quality of this episode; we'd had one too many murder milkshakes to figure out how to fix a busted cable. But given what goes on in this show, can you really blame us for overindulging?

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113. Riverdale S7E10 - American Graffiti

Tue, 06 Jun 2023 00:01:00 -0400

In what is ostensibly Riverdale's horniest season yet, no one in this damn town can seem to get laid. Betty and Veronica are trying their hardest and FINALLY get their "beaus" to take them out on dates, but Archie and Reggie are so obsessed with talking about cars with one another, it's a big fat waste of time (ours, too). Meanwhile, Cheryl is begging Toni to just spend some time with her, and spoiler alert - that's not going well either. At least the Milkman investigation is picking up because we need somewhere to channel all this energy and we're obviously can't count on these other idiots to deliver. P.S. Happy (belated) Global Milk Day! Pour one out for our favorite new serial killer, THE MILKMAN!

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112. Riverdale S7E9 - Betty & Veronica Double Digest

Tue, 30 May 2023 00:01:00 -0400

This week, we're focused on Betty and Veronica, so we only enjoyed 50% of this episode (if you've listened to ANY of our Riverdale episodes, you already know which 50% we hated). Veronica becomes further embroiled in a war with her invisible parents, and Betty is going through it between borderline sexually abusive therapy sessions with Dr. Werthers and being disowned by her own mother for no apparent reason. The 21st Century can't come sooner enough.

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111. Riverdale S7E8 - Hoop Dreams

Tue, 23 May 2023 00:01:00 -0400

This week, it's the return of Reggie (and Tabitha, who disappeared for six episodes but still managed to keep up with her schoolwork, thank god), and it's a whole new ball game! Archie does his golden boy best to help Reggie assimilate, but to the surprise of absolutely no one, Julian Blossom ain't about to let that happen without a fight. Veronica sinks to new lows, and RIP to our favorite new character, Brad Raybury, whose death is chalked up to suicide but was it really? (No. No, it was not.) Maybe Jughead can find the time to get back to that investigation next week, but we're no longer holding our breath.

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110. Riverdale S7E7 - Dirty Dancing

Tue, 16 May 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Recapping this episode was rough for a lot of reasons, but we're gonna give it a ~twirl~

We've got a particularly messed up homophobia plotline for Kevin, a CLASSIC Veronica-turned-entrepreneur story, and the briefest glimpse of THE MILKMAN threatening the life of our favorite new character, Brad Raybury. Dare we hope for a murder investigation next week?? Tune in next time to find out!

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109. Riverdale S7E6 - Peep Show

Tue, 09 May 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Peep show? More like creep show -- this episode features an overly involved Uncle Frank (and his mustache) cracking the whip on Archie for no good reason, Jughead engaging in a bit of unapologetic theft from his personal hero, and in our weirdest B&V team-up yet, a lingerie fashion show and a joint "Peeping Patty" session that made us ALL uncomfortable. At least Choni is back in action (FINALLY) and we got a random cameo from a familiar Farmie face...

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108. Riverdale S7E5 - Tales in a Jugular Vein

Tue, 02 May 2023 00:01:00 -0400

We interrupt our regularly scheduled garbage to take a pointless detour through someone's comic book-inspired fever dream on this week's episode of Riverdale. We get bite-size morality tales featuring headless basketball players, jungle leprosy, what was ALMOST a Spiderwoman origin story, and a menage a trois that's a real side-splitter (WINK WINK). This episode was a waste of time, but our recap is NOT, so let us get you caught up in a much less painful way so we're all ready to tackle more serious issues next week! (But probably not.)

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107. Riverdale S7E4 - Love & Marriage

Tue, 25 Apr 2023 00:01:00 -0400

This week, we celebrate the demise of our first mismatched pairing, thanks to Betty's unerring determination to GET LAID. With Cheryl and Archie on thin ice as well, we direct our full ire towards the blasphemy that is Vughead (BARF) and their half-hearted attempt to solve the milkman murders between bouts of awkward banter and unsexy makeout sessions. In other news, Uncle Frank is back and sporting an evil-looking mustache and an ATTITUDE, and a very pleased toad tells Midge she's pregnant with Fangs' baby. We wish we were kidding.

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106. Riverdale S7E3 - Sex Education

Tue, 18 Apr 2023 00:01:00 -0400

If you came here for sex or education, we're sorry to say that this episode has neither. What we can offer is our most valiant attempt at making something interesting out of a very dull episode of Riverdale that couldn't deliver on its promise of salacious sexy times. Let us draw your focus instead to the newest murderer on the scene...THE MILKMAN, who allegedly stabby stabbed Ethel's parents and is still at large! Who will be the next victim, and is this mysterious Milkman someone we know? We don't have many answers yet, but what we do know is that it's a very good time to be lactose intolerant.

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105. Riverdale S7E1&2 - Don’t Worry Darling & Skip, Hop and Thump

Tue, 11 Apr 2023 21:08:03 -0400

Gas up your DeLoreans because Season 7 of Riverdale is stuck in the 50s and we really need to get back to the future where, admittedly, everything still sucks but at least we'd be rid of Veronica's bangs. While Tabitha is working on untangling some timelines to restore the gang to the present day, we're working on untangling some of the ridiculous elements we've already been introduced to in just the first couple of episodes like the fact that these are now fully grown adults acting like 16-year-olds again and Jughead is somehow able to dig up a time capsule that won't be buried for another 60 years...

Come along with us as we lovingly hate on this shitshow called Riverdale for one last season before we all get taken out by Bailey's Comet for good.

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104. Riverdale Season 7 Preview

Tue, 28 Mar 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Brace yourselves! Season 7 of Riverdale is almost upon us! And there is A LOT of reminiscing to be done, as well as some well-intentioned attempts at predicting what's to come. We are both excited and terrified to see what the writers have in store for this final season of a show that has jumped about a hundred sharks in its 6-year runtime, and we hope you'll be there to experience it with us!

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103. Infinity Pool

Tue, 21 Mar 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Here's a drinking game sure to mess you up -- one rule: drink every time we say "EW." Infinity Pool might just be the most disgusting movie we've ever covered, and that's saying something considering we watched a movie about two people being sewn together at the abdomen and another movie where evil pastries cause you to fart yourself to death. This one was an incredibly bizarre trip that we were wholly unprepared for. Join us as we unpack the unsettling exploration of human nature that is Infinity Pool, but fair warning -- you may never be able to look at tomato sauce the same way again.

We also took this opportunity to help promote one of our fellow indie podcasts, 2 Cents Critic! Be sure to check out their trailer at the top of our episode and look for our Instagram post to find links to their social media and streaming sites.

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102. Good Mourning

Tue, 14 Mar 2023 00:01:00 -0400

Razzie Award-winning director Colson Baker brings us this week's assault on our ears and eyes, and let's just say, we've hit a new low. Good Mourning redefines "waste of time" and the flaccid attempt at a plot makes some of the other movies we've watched for this podcast look like Best Pictures. We've thoughtfully condensed a HARROWING 90-minute experience into a very digestible 35-minute conversation, and quite frankly, there should be a new type of award for that.

We also took this opportunity to help promote one of our fellow indie podcasts, Chat Tsunami! Be sure to check out their trailer at the top of our episode and look for our Instagram post to find links to their social media and streaming sites.

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101. Lady Chatterley’s Lover

Tue, 28 Feb 2023 00:01:00 -0500

It's gettin' hot in here, so take off all your clothes -- except your undershirt and old timey suspenders because GOD DAMN, that's a good look. We couldn't have hoped for a better way to end our month of loooove celebration than with this steamy cinematic sexventure, so if you are looking for a way to warm up in these cold winter months, throw on Lady Chatterley's Lover and join our conversation about the unequivocally swoon-worthy Oliver Mellors and those goddamn suspenders.

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100. Archie: To Riverdale and Back

Tue, 21 Feb 2023 00:01:00 -0500

For our 100th episode, we wanted to do something really special and this made-for-tv movie from 1990 based on our beloved Archie Comics characters definitely fit the bill! Just over two years ago, we were inspired to start making this podcast so we could have the opportunity to vent about the ridiculousness that is the CW series Riverdale. One hundred episodes later, we're still venting about that but now we get to add this version of Riverdale to the mix! Archie: To Riverdale and Back is one long terrible episode of Riverdale complete with cheesy dialogue, a thin plot regarding the potential destruction of Pop's, and inspirational speeches about coming together as town delivered by the man, Archie Andrews, himself. Special thanks to our fans who have been with us since our very first episode covering Episode 1 of Season 5 of Riverdale -- this one is for you!

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99. The Final Rose

Tue, 14 Feb 2023 00:01:00 -0500

If you're looking for an exciting, romantic movie to watch while you're curled up with that special someone this Valentine's Day...keep looking because The Final Rose ain't it. Fans of Bachelor Nation will get a kick out of the obvious winks and nods to the franchise, but other than trying to be a parody, this movie has NO idea what it's doing and you WILL be disappointed by the lackluster resolution.

We also took this opportunity to help promote one of our fellow indie podcasts, From Under the Apron! Be sure to check out their trailer at the top of our episode and look for our Instagram post to find links to their social media and streaming sites.

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98. I’m Thinking of Ending Things

Mon, 06 Feb 2023 23:03:01 -0500

We're thinking of ending this podcast after watching this needlessly long exercise in awkward conversations. (Just kidding, we're masochists and we will watch bad movies and tell you about them until we die.) But seriously, I'm Thinking of Ending Things truly tested our tolerance for pretentious crap, and without vital intel from the book that started it all, our discussion would have been as confusing and unsatisfying as the movie itself. Let us save you some time and tell you all about it so you don't have to go through it, too.

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97. Abandoned

Tue, 31 Jan 2023 00:01:00 -0500

If you've ever gotten stuck sitting next to a screaming baby on a two-hour plane flight, then you already know what it feels like to watch Abandoned. It's honestly hard to say anything else about this movie because our ears are still ringing from the never-ending assault, but if you were wondering if the movie was able to save itself with interesting plot twists and genuine suspense, well, you'll be disappointed there too. Save yourself some time and agony by listening to our recap! Another bullet heroically taken for our dear listeners.

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96. Emily in Paris S3E9&10 - Love Is In the Air & Charade

Tue, 24 Jan 2023 00:01:00 -0500

Join us in saying, "Bon voyage!" to another craptastic season of Emily in Paris! The show left us with quite a cliffhanger and not so subtly hinted that there will be even more drama to come in Season 4. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. Bombs are dropped left and right in these final two episodes, and we're here to help you make sense of the carnage. Thanks for coming on the journey with us! We hated it!

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95. Emily in Paris S3E7&8 - How to Lose a Designer in 10 Days & Fashion Victim

Tue, 17 Jan 2023 00:01:00 -0500

Mess continues to be the primary feature of this season of Emily in Paris, and with just two episodes left, we're expecting to get a whole lot of cringe. With Camille and Alfie conveniently absent from the plot this week, Emily and Gabriel are inching closer and closer to the boundary of appropriate contact, and we have our doubts they can keep dancing around it for much longer. Plus Mindy is in pickle now that Emily has successfully forced herself into a business partnership with Nicolas that it turns out she doesn't even actually want and is subsequently blowing up in her face. Hang in there, everyone! We just have one episode left, so don't forget to tune in again next week for the finale!

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94. Emily in Paris S3E5&6 - Ooh La La Liste & Ex-en-Provence

Tue, 10 Jan 2023 00:01:00 -0500

If you like love triangles, these episodes are for you. But we hate them so this was a rough go. Fortunately, we have some precious moments from Luc, sassy takedowns a la Sylvie and a mouth-watering discussion about Bloomin' Onions to keep our heads from exploding. We're over the hump, y'all! Catch up now so we can suffer through the final episodes as one cringing mass!

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93. Emily in Paris S3E3&4 - Coo D’etat & Live from Paris, It’s Emily Cooper

Tue, 03 Jan 2023 00:01:00 -0500

Four episodes deep, there's no turning back now! We are struggling to keep up with the rapid life cycle of the storylines and make sense of the random journeys some of the characters are on, so really, it's just an average recap of this consistently stupid show.

We also took this opportunity to help promote one of our fellow indie podcasts, Life Paranormal with V! Be sure to check out the trailer at the top of our episode and search for Vanessa's podcast on the major streaming platforms to get started listening.

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92. Emily in Paris S3E1&2 - I Have Two Lovers & What It’s All About...

Tue, 27 Dec 2022 00:01:00 -0500

I Hate It, Let's Watch It is here with one last gift for your holiday season of 2022 -- the return of Emily in Paris recaps! Just like Season 2, we are micro-dosing Season 3 so we don't go completely insane trying to come to terms with Emily's idiotic decision-making (or lack of decision-making), her questionable fashion choices, and Madeline's irritating presence. Thankfully, we still have Sylvie, Luc and Julien to help counter the nonsense. Otherwise, rest assured, we would not still be doing this. Whether you're watching along with us or you just want a less painful experience of keeping up with the show through our recaps, we're thrilled to have you on this journey with us!

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91. The Gingerdead Man

Tue, 20 Dec 2022 00:01:00 -0500

Between the poor video quality and terrible Texan accents, you probably won't even notice that this last installment of our holiday movie series isn't actually a Christmas movie. It's probably for the best because you wouldn't want ANYTHING to steal focus from this horrifying undead cookie who wields weapons ten times its body weight and somehow has jelly guts on the inside? As the grand finale of our 2022 movie lineup, The Gingerdead Man really made us feel good about taking a little break from movies for a bit.

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90. Fatman

Tue, 13 Dec 2022 00:01:00 -0500

Well, listeners, it finally happened. We accidentally watched a good movie this time. How could a movie built on the premise of a naughty child ordering a hit on Santa Claus actually turn out to be a decent film? Christmas magic, obviously. (And also strong performances by Mel Gibson and Walton Goggins, an average Joe take on the character of Santa, and not a single elf was harmed in the making.)

Also, we are promoting one of our fellow indie podcasts this week, If You Give a Dad a Podcast! Be sure to check out the trailer at the top of our episode and click here to access their website to learn more!

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89. Falling for Christmas

Mon, 05 Dec 2022 23:19:35 -0500

Despite its problematic amnesia-based love story and gratuitous overacting from a few of the characters (*cough*looking at you, Tad*cough*), we found Falling for Christmas to be an unexpected delight! Lindsay Lohan is charming and redeems the movie's cheesier moments, while the true comedy is in the bizarre details (don't get us started on the key skillets). Is this a good movie? It's not the best. But is this a good Christmas movie? We sure fell for it, and we think you will too.

We also took this opportunity to help promote one of our fellow indie podcasts, PNW Haunts & Homicides! Be sure to check out their trailer at the top of our episode and access their website here to get to know them a little better.

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88. Don’t Worry Darling

Tue, 29 Nov 2022 00:01:00 -0500

A truly compelling film that absolutely biffs it in the second act, Don't Worry Darling deserves all the hype it got and more. We don't have a goddamn speck of criticism for Florence Pugh, whose performance almost single-handedly plugs up the gaping plot holes that appear as the movie attempts its sloppy climax, but we certainly have questions, comments and complaints about everything else. This is definitely the kind of movie that sticks with you and keeps you thinking long after the screen goes black, so if you have any opinions or insights you want to share, we'd love to hear them!

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87. Abandon

Tue, 22 Nov 2022 00:01:00 -0500

Twenty years ago in the early 2000s, Spyglass Entertainment brought Katie Holmes, Benjamin Bratt, Zooey Deschanel, and Charlie Hunnam together, on the cusp of their journeys to fame, to make one of the most pointless and pretentious "thrillers" of all time. Never heard of this one? There's a good reason. Actually, there are many good reasons. If you want to know what they are, give this episode a listen!

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86. Inheritance

Tue, 15 Nov 2022 00:01:00 -0500

If Succession and Riverdale had a baby, you'd get Inheritance. Between the daddy issues, the extravagant wealth, and the classic secret underground bunker, loyal listeners of our podcast should feel right at home in this episode!

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85. House of Wax

Tue, 25 Oct 2022 00:01:00 -0400

We are throwing it back to 2005 with this spooky season pick, and damn, did we get nostalgic for fluffy He-Man haircuts, brick-like Nokia cell phones, and peak One Tree Hill era Chad Michael Murray. If you have not listened to our episodes covering Two and Malignant, we suggest you check those out as well because House of Wax walked so those movies could RUN. Happy Halloween, everyone! Check your kids' candy for wax!

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84. Two

Tue, 18 Oct 2022 00:01:00 -0400

This movie was so gross, we ended up spending most of our time learning about conjoined twins and discussing hypothetical scenarios of incest. And yes -- discussing incest is still less gross than discussing what went on in this depraved movie. Two is basically the diet version of Human Centipede with a somehow even lazier plot, and how Dawn convinced Lisa to cover it is still a mystery.

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83. Fall

Tue, 11 Oct 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Two women's poor decisions leave them stranded at the top of a derelict TV tower and yet they were still smarter than the people who gave 3/4 of the characters in this movie very confusing last names. Also, do you love mountain goats? Well, there aren't actually any mountain goats in this movie, but Dawn talks about them A LOT. If your acrophobia prevented you from checking out this recent "thriller," let us walk you through each and every predictable twist and turn because we'd never leave you hanging...

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82. Into the Dark - Down

Tue, 27 Sep 2022 00:01:00 -0400

If confined spaces and/or braindead female protagonists make your blood pressure spike, this is the exact wrong movie for you. In what can only be described as a Black Mirror episode gone wrong, Down confirms the hypothesis that a movie shot almost entirely in an elevator WILL be mind-numbingly boring, even if one of the people stuck in that elevator is a psychopathic finance bro bent on avenging underappreciated security guards everywhere.

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81. Teeth

Tue, 20 Sep 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Teeth is a true classic that even Eli Roth believes deserves a place in the top 100 scariest movies of all time, but do we agree? Let's just say this movie is a wild ride, and if you can get past Dawn's preachy abstinence obsession and the gut-churning array of prop penises, you might have a good time!

*Warning! This episode involves discussions of rape, sexual assault and child sexual assault.*

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80. The Next 365 Days

Tue, 13 Sep 2022 00:01:00 -0400

First, there were two guns in the club. Then, there was a secret evil twin. We were expecting BIG things from the third (and ALLEGEDLY final) installment of the 365 Days series we've come to know and love (despite our better judgment). Sadly, this trilogy ends with a whimper rather than a bang...but is this really the end? Could there be an opportunity for redemption? Hit us up on Twitter and let us know if you're Team Massimo or Team Nacho, and listen to our episode to find out where we stand.

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79. Nocturnal Animals

Tue, 30 Aug 2022 00:01:00 -0400

If you enjoyed our Woman in the Window episode...this is basically that. We are split on our feelings about Nocturnal Animals, another suspenseful drama that revolves around Amy Adams and her character's troubled past, and we would love to hear who you agree with! Was this movie a successful revenge metaphor or a pretentious journey through a spoiled, selfish woman's melodramatic life? We've certainly got our opinions.

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78. The Midnight Meat Train

Tue, 23 Aug 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Bradley Cooper is nice to look at and that's about the only good thing we can say about this very confusing and gross movie. While we don't exactly condone watching The Midnight Meat Train on your own time, we are deeply curious to know if anyone has been able to make sense of the ending or the chest barnacles that are still haunting our dreams to this day.

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77. The Resort

Tue, 16 Aug 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Find us four less likable people than the morons leading us through this 76-minute express train to hell, WE DARE YOU. Between the near-constant whining, the lengthy braindead conversations about ghosts and spirituality, and the complete lack of a discernible plot, The Resort may quite possibly be one of the worst movies we've ever covered. If you're inclined to check it out for yourself, we encourage you to chase it with an entire bottle of tequila like our boy Sam (RIP, you cliched doofus).

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76. Hypnotic

Tue, 09 Aug 2022 00:01:00 -0400

If you're having a bad day, need a self-esteem booster and want to feel smart, then Hypnotic is the movie for you! With a plot so simple that a 7th grader could have written it and "twists" so predictable you could see them a mile away in dense fog with a blindfold on, this movie doesn't even attempt to be smarter than its audience and as a result, it's a snoozefest from start to finish.

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75. Riverdale S6E22 - Night of the Comet

Thu, 04 Aug 2022 23:36:49 -0400

Things look BLEAK for Riverdale in the Season 6 finale -- Bailey's Comet is hurtling right at this cursed place, no one can escape Percival's bubble dome, and everyone's best hope is the vindictive spirit of Abigail Blossom which is still imprisoned in the creepy Julien doll. In spite of the odds (and our fervent prayers for utter decimation), Archie and the gang survive Doomsday but at what cost?? This finale sets up the premise for Season 7 and, spoiler alert, WE ARE NOT HAPPY. Thanks for coming on this painful journey with us! We hope you'll come suffer with us again through the final season of Riverdale!

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74. Till Death

Tue, 02 Aug 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Till Death dares to ask the question, what would you do if the ol' ball and chain became a very literal ball and chain? Handcuffed to her husband's dead body, Megan Fox's Emma must complete the most extreme escape room challenge to get out of this crazy scheme alive. It definitely helps that she somehow moves like a stealthy ninja, despite her cumbersome predicament, and that the goons hired to kill her are very stupid/possibly blind. It also helps that she seems impervious to frostbite and can hold her breath in ICE COLD water for an extremely long time. Yes, there were problems with this movie. But did we have fun? Listen and find out!

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73. Riverdale S6E21 - The Stand

Fri, 29 Jul 2022 00:01:00 -0400

It's getting down to the wire, and we're FINALLY starting to understand! The science behind the Rivervale alternate universe is explained! It makes perfect sense why we spent all that time watching Archie unionize the laborers! We even get to see what's going on at good ol' Riverdale High School, and IT ALL COMES TOGETHER! Juuuuust kidding. We get absolutely none of that. We DO get to finally dispose of Percival, just in time to be introduced to our latest villain...Bailey's Comet. You know those heart-warming stories of marathon runners carrying a fellow runner to the finish line when they are too weak to go on? That's us and that's you. Let us carry you to the finish line of Season 6 of Riverdale because if you've made it this far, you MUST be exhausted.

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72. Riverdale S6E19&20 - The Witches of Riverdale & Return to Rivervale

Fri, 22 Jul 2022 00:01:00 -0400

We're coming at you with a two-fer this week because honestly, folks, we are limping to the finish line here. Episode 19 brought us entirely unwanted and unnecessary closure for failed Archie Comic universe show The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina and quite frankly wasted our time, but Episode 20 bombarded us with plot reveals and explanations. And while we did enjoy gaining some semblance of what the FUCK is going on this season, we still have hundreds of unanswered questions, particularly regarding the logistics of parallel universes and why our Riverdale-themed merchandise was removed from TeePublic by the Disney Corporation. Only two episodes remain in Season 6, so if you aren't caught up, check out our recaps! Some say it's a much less painful replacement for watching the actual show...

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71. Old

Tue, 19 Jul 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Ahh, to live and die on a white sandy beach...But it's M. Night Shyamalan, so it was never going to be that simple. The relaxing tropical vibe is shattered almost immediately by anemic character development, six-year-olds having sex, stabby schizophrenics, IMPOSSIBLE lung capacity, and a lackluster "twist" ending. We have TONS of questions and (spoiler alert) we do a pretty terrible job of attempting to answer them considering the fact that this movie gave us nothing.

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70. Willy’s Wonderland

Tue, 12 Jul 2022 00:01:00 -0400

If, like us, you're a 90s kid and grew up with a perfectly rational fear of the haunting dead-eyed stare of one Charles Entertainment Cheese, this movie WILL trigger you. It's almost too easy to accept that Willy's Wonderland had once been operated by a ring of serial killers who then all committed suicide in a satanic ritual which preserved their murderous souls in the bodies of animatronic characters. Nick Cage certainly has no problem coming to terms with it, and the carnage that ensues is both ridiculous and hilarious. Oh, and it's worth mentioning that Nick Cage does not say a single word for the duration of this film. It. Is. Wild.

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69. The Sand

Tue, 05 Jul 2022 00:01:00 -0400

If you thought that a movie filmed in 12 days on one beach with an undisclosed (probably shoestring) budget would be a big mistake, we're here to tell you that you're absolutely right. Flawed from the sand up, this movie posits questions it never bothers to answer, tries to get us invested in a love triangle with three of the most unlikeable humans known to man, and at the end of the day, REFUSES to explain what exactly the fuck is up with the titular sand. We recommend this film to anyone who wants to feel smart, because every character in this movie is a next level idiot except for the undisputed savior of this otherwise complete disaster, Beach Patrol Alex. Please sign our petition to get this guy his own movie.

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68. Riverdale S6E18 - Biblical

Fri, 01 Jul 2022 00:01:00 -0400

It's the wedding of the century, and everyone is invited, including frogs, locusts, assorted other Biblical plagues...oh, and Kevin. Toni and Fangs tying the knot is supposed to unite Riverdale, but instead it makes Veronica realize how sad and alone she is and distracts the rest of the gang from keeping an eye on Percival, who ends up murdering all the first-born children in Riverdale. Whoops. What do you say we all just quietly back away and let this be the end?

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67. X

Tue, 28 Jun 2022 00:01:00 -0400

This 2022 horror flick is NOT for the faint of heart (RIP Howard) but the scares have nothing to do with the bloody murders, gator attacks or eyeball kebabs and EVERYTHING TO DO with the aggressive hair brushing, the non-consensual spooning, and all that elderly nudity. This movie will burn your retinas and make your skin crawl, so if that doesn't sound like a good time, just listen to our recap! We'll tell you what you need to know so you can skip the gruesome visuals. Feel free to thank us with a cocktail.

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66. Nurse 3D

Tue, 21 Jun 2022 00:01:00 -0400

As a post-Father's Day treat, we bring you the mother of all daddy issues movies! This thing is a train wreck from start to finish -- the dubbing, Nurse 3D's acting, the absolutely bonkers costume design, and the thinnest of plots. Another one that has to be seen (and heard) to be believed...please do yourself a favor and check this one out so you can laugh along with us!

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65. Riverdale S6E17 - American Psychos

Fri, 17 Jun 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Musical episode? What musical episode? If you hate Riverdalians bursting into song as much as we do, you'll be pleasantly surprised with the Season 6 version of one because there were barely any musical numbers at all. Instead, we get childish curses gone awry, a worker's union sing-a-long, and an unsatisfying attempt at closure on all this TBK business. But we survived, which is more than we can say for our serial killer Romeo.

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64. Attack of the Killer Doughnuts

Tue, 14 Jun 2022 00:01:00 -0400

We hope you enjoyed National Doughnut Day on June 3rd because after you watch this movie/listen to our recap, you'll probably never want to eat another doughnut again. While we did find this movie to be a fun and creative concept, we were definitely caught off guard by the gratuitous farting and graphic deaths that resulted from said farting. However, we were NOT surprised by the mediocre acting, incredibly thin plot, and completely bizarre character choices that make this movie both a disaster and a delight. Check this one out! And maybe stick with our doughnut-themed shots rather than actual doughnuts.

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63. Riverdale S6E16 - Blue Collar

Fri, 03 Jun 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Us: Omg this episode of Riverdale was SO BORING.

Also us: *talks about this episode of Riverdale for almost an hour*

Okay, so we underestimated just how much we'd have to say about Anthony being a baby Serpent, Percival's seemingly endless supply of mind tricks, and all the asinine batshittery that has been promised to us in the upcoming musical episode. If you didn't watch this episode yet, just listen to our recap because we guarantee it's more entertaining.

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62. Rubber

Tue, 31 May 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Welcome to the episode that almost ended our podcast! We've never been so divided about a movie we've covered, and we came ready to fight about it. In case you've never heard of it, Rubber is a painfully indie movie about a homicidal car tire and the "studio audience" who watches the action unfold through binoculars in the desert. If that sounds weird, it honestly doesn't even scratch the surface. Give us a listen and then let us know whose side you're on! Did you love it? Did you hate it? There is definitely a right answer...

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61. Riverdale S6E15 - Things That Go Bump in the Night

Fri, 27 May 2022 00:01:00 -0400

This episode is a classic example of Riverdale's biggest problem -- not knowing when to quit. Dear Riverdale, WE ARE TIRED of the serial killer gene nonsense (it's not even a real thing universally recognized by science); WE ARE TIRED of new characters with weird/sketchy vibes; WE ARE TIRED of ghosts interfering with plans to move Pop's before Percival can bulldoze it. Okay, that last one is new, but we're already over it. What horrors await us next week? Probably the same old shit.

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60. Riverdale S6E14 - Venomous

Fri, 20 May 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Welcome to yet another episode of Riverdale we hated (and watched anyway)! Were you disturbed by the weird threesome energy of that VeBArchie scene? Did you roll your eyes at the shameless retconning of Hal Cooper into an exaggerated caricature of what a serial killer would be like as a dad? And are you fed up with that spiteful old cow, Nana Rose? Well, you have friends here, because we said yes to all of those and we have MORE.

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59. Riverdale S6E13 - Ex-Libris

Fri, 13 May 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Normally, we stan a petty queen, but Percival takes his pestering to a whole new level in this week's episode of Riverdale by making it his mission to recover overdue library books. If we're being honest, we'd rather be charged with misdemeanor theft than be subjected to eczema bordering on leprosy, swampy ghosts of child predators past, or developing the venomous characteristics of a black widow spider, but no one seems to be able to tell Percival to fuck off, so that's what we get. Can someone take this guy out already? We're willing to sacrifice Jughead for the cause.

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58. 365 Days: This Day

Tue, 10 May 2022 00:01:00 -0400

We cannot overstate our adoration of this movie trilogy. It truly has everything we look for in a hate-watch: terrible dialogue, confusing attempts at a plot, enormous holes in the fabric of the story, and deeply flawed main characters who we are somehow supposed to root for. Just like its predecessor, 365 Days: This Day hits every single mark, and also THAT PLOT TWIST, Y'ALL!? The wild ride continues, and we're loving EVERY hump and bump (a wink-wink)!

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57. Riverdale S6E12 - The Fog

Fri, 06 May 2022 09:12:26 -0400

Typically, we love the trope of "weird weather acting as a plot device," but this character-driven episode of Riverdale sadly misses the mark. Even though we finally get to address some of the forgotten plot points of the season, we're SO BORED by the predictability and repetitive nonsense that Riverdale is unfortunately becoming known for. With an impending apocalypse, our burning question is...do we even care anymore?

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56. Riverdale S6E10&11 - Folk Heroes & Angels in America

Tue, 03 May 2022 00:01:00 -0400

If we were chronokinetic, we would go back in time and stop this atrocious season of Riverdale from happening. From ever evolving superpowers to weird religious undertones, these two episodes are everything we hate, saved from being a total waste of time only by KJ Apa's abs. Apparently, the apocalypse is coming to Riverdale, but maybe not soon enough.

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55. Windfall

Tue, 19 Apr 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Take the money and run...is NOT what Jason Segel does in this movie. And if he had, he would have saved us all a lot of time. Maybe he couldn't run in those boots that were significant for some reason that is never fully explained? Or maybe he was on some kind of personal moral quest that would have made more sense if it had ever been revealed to us? This movie provides ZERO answers, and we have a MILLION questions.

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54. Riverdale S6E9 - The Serpent Queen’s Gambit

Fri, 15 Apr 2022 00:01:00 -0400

This week, we're actually in total agreement with Percival Pickens' plan to put an end to gang violence in Riverdale which either means we've officially gone crazy OR Percival's mind control powers work long distance. But don't worry, we still have plenty of complaints about Abigail's basket of cyanide scones, the deeply toxic relationship that is Veggie, and the return of Julien...

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53. Riverdale S6E8 - The Town

Fri, 08 Apr 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Here we go again, folks! It's time for Archie to rally "The Town" to save Riverdale for some inexplicable reason. But this is what we're doing, so we're here to help you break down Percival's clearly nefarious motivations, the dubious nature of the gang's superpowers, the waste of time that is and has always been the Blossoms, and why opening a casino in a town historically plagued by greed, corruption, crime and poverty may NOT have been the best idea, VERONICA.

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52. Deep Water

Tue, 05 Apr 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Let's be honest, we've all thought to ourselves at some point, "Hey. You know what would fix this toxic relationship? Polygamy. And if that doesn't work, there's always murder." No? Just this movie? Deep Water, starring Ben Affleck and Ana de Armas, is 75% a very explicit How-NOT-To guide on navigating relationships and 25% a snail documentary, and if that doesn't convince you to check out this episode, we don't know what will.

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51. Riverdale S6E7 - Death at a Funeral

Fri, 01 Apr 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Keeping up with Riverdale this season feels like a full-time job. Episode 7 lays A LOT of groundwork, and given what we've seen so far, things could literally go ANYWHERE at this point. For now, we're focused on processing Hiram's alleged death, figuring out what the hell Nana Rose and Abigail are up to, and trying to predict exactly what the HELL is going on with TBK. (Special thanks to Lisa's dear friend and IT expert Brandon, without whom this episode would literally not exist.)

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50. Riverdale S6E6 - Unbelievable

Fri, 25 Mar 2022 00:01:00 -0400

Ready or not -- Riverdale is back! In this aptly titled episode, some characters develop supernatural abilities, some characters die (maybe??), and some characters just aren't themselves anymore if ya know what we mean. We're very nervous about where the rest of Season 6 is going at this point but let's find out together!

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49. The Woman in the Window

Tue, 22 Mar 2022 00:01:00 -0400

The Woman in the Window is one of five movies nominated for a Golden Raspberry Award in 2022...but does it deserve that title? We compare the movie to the book and discuss what worked and what didn't and tackle the larger question of whether or not the Rear Window genre of thriller movies is played out. It's a very reasonable 100 minutes (or 90 minutes, if you're Dawn), so check this one out and let us know what you think!

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48. Uncut Gems

Tue, 15 Mar 2022 00:01:00 -0400

If you are one of the millions who endured this 135-minute assault on eyes, ears and quality of life, we see you and we salute you. And we also want to remind you that therapy exists and can help you. (And if that doesn't work, there's always alcohol.) Julia Fox will tell you that she was the muse for this obscenely terrible movie, but we're pretty sure the muse was actually a flaming bag of crap. Oh, and to the 92% of Rotten Tomatoes critics who thought this was a GOOD movie...you can't sit with us.

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47. Good Neighbours

Tue, 08 Mar 2022 00:01:00 -0500

We like to think of Canada as a friendly and peaceful country, but that is NOT the experience of this week's movie, Good Neighbours. There's cat murder, human murder and just general murder of hope and faith in humanity, so we actually don't recommend watching this one for a good time. Or any kind of time, really. But if you want to know all the gruesome details without putting yourself through the visual assault, that's what we're here for! Yes, we took this bullet for you. Don't let it be in vain.

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46. 365 Days

Tue, 01 Mar 2022 00:01:00 -0500

We're ending our month of love with a BANG. Like...a LOT of banging. We watched 365 Days, the occasionally sexy but deeply troubled cousin of Fifty Shades of Grey, and IT. IS. WILD. This movie has it all: aggressive blow jobs, a dangerous mobster with a heart of gold (or at least a penis of gold), and somehow more than one parallel to classic Disney movies. We already can't wait for Part 2 (rumored for release this year), and after listening to our recap, we bet you'll feel the same way.

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45. Killer Sofa

Tue, 22 Feb 2022 00:01:00 -0500

This is it, everyone -- the best movie we've done so far. Our month of timeless love stories continues with Killer Sofa. You're in for a WILD ride that includes occult/voodoo rituals, deeply disturbing masturbation scenes and an impressively agile murderous recliner. If you have not watched this movie yet, it is a MUST SEE.

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44. Valentine

Tue, 15 Feb 2022 00:01:00 -0500

We're kicking off our three-week Valentine's Day celebration with a nostalgic teen slasher movie from Dawn's past! This is VALENTINE, starring late 90s/early 2000s heartthrob David Boreanaz and some other people we don't quite care about as much. If anyone is out there thinking that romance is dead...well, we (and this movie) couldn't agree more.

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43. Emily in Paris S2E9&10 - Scents & Sensibility, & French Revolution

Tue, 08 Feb 2022 00:01:00 -0500

Pop the Champere, it's finale time! Join us one last time as we sing Sylvie's praises, dump on Emily's consistently piss-poor decisions, and sharpen our pitchforks to take down Madeline, the Wicked Witch of the Western Hemisphere.

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42. Emily in Paris S2E7&8 - The Cook, the Thief, Her Ghost and His Lover & Champagne Problems

Tue, 01 Feb 2022 06:00:00 -0500

Please sign our petition to make Emily in Paris all about Sylvie! We are officially obsessed with her journey this season and watching her handle her personal drama with such poise and strength is a welcome vacation with Emily's hot mess of a situationship. In addition to gushing about Sylvie, we discuss the stigma of age differences in relationships, the art of ghosting, and Dawn shares a very intimate personal story.

41. Emily in Paris S2E5&6 - An Englishman in Paris & Boiling Point

Tue, 25 Jan 2022 06:00:00 -0500

Not going to lie, these mid-season episodes of Emily in Paris were boring AF. Sure, we get to know Alfie a little bit more but we also see Emily continue to lie to herself and everyone else about her feelings for Gabriel which is starting to drive us bananas. If there's one thing we can say at this point, it's that we're two episodes closer to to end.

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40. Emily in Paris S2E3&4 - Bon Anniversaire! & Jules and Em

Tue, 18 Jan 2022 06:00:00 -0500

We know what you're thinking -- an hour is a LONG time to discuss just two episodes of Emily in Paris. But don't worry! A large part of today's episode involves Dawn interrogating Lisa about her potato preferences, a resurrection of our own personal relationship traumas, and no leeks are left behind!

39. Emily in Paris S2E1&2 - Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi? & Do You Know the Way to St. Tropez?

Tue, 11 Jan 2022 06:00:00 -0500

I Hate It, Let's Watch It is back to bring you another year of beautiful dumpster fires, starting with Season 2 of Emily in Paris! Patience is already running thin after witnessing the shenanigans of these first two episodes, so please come on this journey with us because misery loves company.

38. Santa Jaws

Tue, 28 Dec 2021 06:00:00 -0500

Here at I Hate It, Let's Watch It, we are well aware of the multitudes of terrible Christmas movies being produced by Hallmark and Lifetime and pretty much every streaming service around. We could have picked a movie where a nutcracker comes to life or a career-driven woman learns that falling in love with her high school sweetheart is more important than personal success, but WE DARED to think outside of the box this holiday season, and we are proud to bring you this underrated Christmas classic about a shark wearing a Santa hat on her dorsal fin who can only be killed with Christmas. Please enjoy, and join us in the new year for more delightful dumpster fire movies and tv shows!

37. Riverdale S6E5 - The Jughead Paradox

Tue, 21 Dec 2021 06:00:00 -0500

It's the 100th episode of Riverdale, and this episode has all the hallmarks of a classic Riverdale shitshow -- obscure character reappearances, mass confusion, a murder mystery, and a needlessly complicated plot resolution. We attempt to break it all down for you before we take a well-deserved vacation from Riverdale until March 2022. Thanks for coming on this crazy ride with us!

36. Riverdale S6E4 - The Witching Hour(s)

Tue, 14 Dec 2021 06:00:00 -0500

If you like terrible period costumes/hair/dialogue and a classic body swap spell, you're going to love this week's episode of Riverdale! Unfortunately, we hate all of those things so we were straight-up not having a good time, bro. On the bright side, this is the penultimate episode of the Rivervale event, and that light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter, so join us as we muddle through to the end.

35. Riverdale S6E3 - Mr. Cypher

Tue, 07 Dec 2021 06:00:00 -0500

There are only so many times we can say how terrible this 5-episode special event is, so this week's recap is a little short. But we still manage to cover each and every mind-boggling moment, from Pop Tate dropkicking the Devil out of the diner to Veronica's cringey musical performance (if there's one thing we can count on in both RiverDale and RiverVale, it's disappointing musical performances). Three down, two to go! Stay strong, people!

34. Riverdale S6E2 - Ghost Stories

Tue, 30 Nov 2021 06:00:00 -0500

It's legitimately scary how bad this five-episode event of Rivervale is. Is that what they were getting at by naming this second episode Ghost Stories? Join us in breaking down each of the three spooky vignettes being told this week and if anyone can answer the question of if ANY of this matters, we'd love to hear from you.

33. Riverdale S6E1 - Welcome to Rivervale

Tue, 23 Nov 2021 06:00:00 -0500

Five seasons of chaotic nonsense couldn't even prepare us for the insanity that was Riverdale's Season 6 premiere. In this episode, we do our best to explain the alternate universe of Rivervale, from its pagan rituals and blood sacrifices to bug hauntings and inexplicable baby fever. Tip for making this process less painful -- drink every time we say we're confused.

32. Riverdale Season 6 Preview

Tue, 16 Nov 2021 06:00:00 -0500

Dawn and Lisa break down the Riverdale Season 6 "5-Episode Event" promo trailer shot for shot and speculate about what nonsense awaits us all in the coming weeks.

31. Midnight in the Switchgrass

Tue, 09 Nov 2021 06:00:00 -0500

We're not sure how a movie about catching a dangerous serial killer before he kills again could be so freakin' boring, but Midnight in the Switchgrass managed to hit that mark hard. In a nutshell, Bruce Willis should be ashamed of himself, and all the hype surrounding Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly still wasn't enough to save this film from being super terrible.

30. Malignant

Tue, 26 Oct 2021 06:00:00 -0400

It's spooky season! Join us as we struggle through James Wan's latest contribution to the horror genre, Malignant. We also discuss the scariest movies we've ever seen and decide which movie with questionable logic to tackle next! Happy Halloween!

29. Riverdale S5E19 - Riverdale RIP(?)

Tue, 12 Oct 2021 06:00:00 -0400

It has been a long road, but we made it to the Season 5 finale! There was a town hall meeting, a graduation party, couples getting together...and of course plenty of arson, murder attempts, dead bodies discovered, hilarious 19th century costumes, and a brand new reason for Cheryl to be the single most unlikeable character this show has to offer. Thanks for sticking with us this season! We'll be back in November with season 6 because just like everyone else in the Riverdale universe, we just can't seem to leave.

If Halloween is your thing, don't forget to join us on October 26th for our spooky movie special featuring Malignant!

28. Riverdale S5E17&18 - Dance of Death & Next to Normal

Tue, 05 Oct 2021 06:00:00 -0400

In this 2-for-1 special, Dawn and Lisa analyze the last two weeks of Riverdale, including the infamous musical episode. If you were confused by the resolution of the Lonely Highway murders and the Mothman lore, we've got you covered. Sort of. Also, hot take: the musical episode wasn't terrible?? Next week is the finale of Season 5, so make sure you get caught up with I Hate It, Let's Watch It!

27. Riverdale S5E16 - Band of Brothers

Tue, 21 Sep 2021 06:00:00 -0400

After last week's debacle, Dawn and Lisa are thrilled to get back to Riverdale's usual chaos (and lack of musical numbers). If you want to hear more about suicidal bees and the dubious business enterprise of "Copter Cab," this is the ep for you!

26. Riverdale S5E15 - The Return of the Pussycats

Tue, 14 Sep 2021 06:00:00 -0400

Spoiler alert: Lisa and Dawn did not enjoy this one. With nothing plot-related to analyze, Dawn goes noteless and discussion includes Lisa's murder board, Cheryl's bees, and why Lisa will never watch The Descent or go spelunking ever again.