The Goat American Novel

Episode 1: It Was Not Any Barn She Knew

Fri, 12 Jan 2024 13:33:49 -0800

The start of our journey, in which we meet the farmer and the four kids of the herd, and we listen in on their conversations, their wild goatly imaginings, their dreams...

Discussed: Haunted Barns(?), Spiders are building things with their butts, and FM radio- an old time machine, invisible but all around you.

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Email us with questions and queries at goatamericannovel@gmail.com- Hilde is available for storytelling and workshops at your school or community event in Whatcom county and the Lower Mainland/Fraser Valley

If you are liking this story, please leave us a 5 star review on Apple Podcasts- it really helps- and tell a friend about us. And consider supporting me through my ko-fi page: https://www.ko-fi.com/goatamericannovel

Episode 2: The Milk and Wool Producing Animals’ Neighborhood Society

Fri, 12 Jan 2024 13:37:03 -0800

In this episode, we meet the whole herd, and their neighbors, and we see the goats try- and mainly succeed- to boss all the other animals around. But do the goats, sheep, alpacas, or their respective humans, yet scent the danger wafting from the 100 year old barn?

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

If you are liking this story, please consider supporting me through my ko-fi page: https://www.ko-fi.com/goatamericannovel

Episode 3: The Ballad of Ruby One-Horn

Fri, 26 Jan 2024 07:25:18 -0800

In which the big sister yearling goats tell the kids a terrifying rural legend about the one-horned goat, and FM receives an unexpected visitor, crossing the borders in dreamland to deliver a message...

Special thanks this week to Courtney Lyons for filling in!

Instagram for behind the scenes fun (and goat videos): https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

The Goat American Novel website, we'll have some fun resources coming there soon: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

If you are liking this story, please consider supporting me through my ko-fi page: https://www.ko-fi.com/goatamericannovel

Episode 4: The Corn Brings the Chickens, The Chickens Bring the Noise

Fri, 09 Feb 2024 09:59:56 -0800

In which FM reaches out to her neighbors- the familiar and the frightening, the sensible and the strange, for help with her animals while she takes The Seaside Cure. But first, a squirrel.

We have a map of the farms and list of characters up! View the Map and Character Guide Here. Feel free to consult the character list freely (we confess, it's a story with a lot of characters) and, the map is designed to be colored or painted, please feel free to color the map and send us a picture of your work!

You can find us on instagram @GoatAmericanNovelPod and never hesitate to email us goatamericannovel@gmail.com, send us your questions, let us know where you're listening, what you do while you listen (we've heard reports of family jigsaw puzzling), and most importantly who you're listening with. With Grandpa at the care home? In the car on the way to school? Curled up in bed with your best stuffie? We need these details.

This episode features the incredible voicework of my full cast, as well as some great live-recorded foley from the folks over at freesound.org, who provided the beautiful creative commons recordings of crows, songbirds, bells and dinner ware which made this episode so beautiful and immersive. Thanks for foley artists dibko, manhawks, applesauceav, and inspectorj for their additions to the audio creative commons.

Enjoy

Episode 5: Roars, Thunderbutts, Rattling engines

Fri, 23 Feb 2024 16:39:27 -0800

As FM makes her last preparations to drive away and leave Pearl and Sawyer in charge, two of the kids break out in search of apples. Or is it prize-winning pumpkins? Or is it fear itself they'll wind up chasing?

CW: There is one scary moment! We forgot to warn in the intro! Kids, Mangoat and Silver will be fine!

Episode 6: Tings In Te Barn

Fri, 08 Mar 2024 11:31:21 -0800

In which ouija boards- one regular, one made out of an accursed farm sign- are consulted regarding the supernatural business on the farm. How many ghosts are in this episode? It's not an exact science, but Ruby One Horn is surely here, and at least one haunted cat....

Special thanks this episode to Cora Lyons Smoker, guest starring at the Baker's Daughter. Featured also this week is the foley soundwork of plingavator, kyle'scountry, Rutger Miller, Bevibevel design, and stevious, and Clifford Brown's historic recording of Stardust.

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Thanks as always to Ursula Buker, Gabriel Alden, Caleb Alden, Johnny Buker, Erin Alden, Courtney Lyons, and the Steam Brass Band for their ongoing excellent contributions!

Episode 7: Sawyer Does the Chores. With Literature.

Thu, 21 Mar 2024 22:53:56 -0700

It's time for Sawyer to do the first round of morning chores. But will he be able to do it without striking terror and/or inciting revolution in the hearts of the animals? How will Zipnog cope with no regular supply of The Brown? And what is Goatina up to?

Thanks as always to Ursula Buker, Gabriel Alden, Caleb Alden, Johnny Buker, Erin Alden, Courtney Lyons, the musicians of the Electric Unicorn sessions, and the Steam Brass Band for their ongoing excellent contributions!

This week leaned heavily on Foley artists Fun with Audio (breaking class) Debko (morning chorus with birds) Breviceps (crows), Justkiddink (seagulls and waves) and Zabuhailo (door creaking). Thanks for your work!

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Episode 8: Who, Exactly, Has Got The Power?

Fri, 17 May 2024 10:57:43 -0700

In which a meeting of the Milk and Wool Producing Animals Society collides with a daisy chain, and the yearlings' Demonic Possession theory collides with the awesome force of Squirrel Power. But who, really, has got the power?

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Episode 9: Smash it, Silver. Smash it Good

Fri, 31 May 2024 10:36:14 -0700

In which an unlikely trio of young goats find an old, high, cracked window, and they smash it good. Goatko Ono shares her wisdom, and her wisdom is kinda gross.

Today's crashing smashing waves pounding sounds were made possible by Foley artists animationisac, sclolex, goldendiaphragm, freqman, previsionary, fresco, breviceps, bevildevil, zxaudio, and justkiddink

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Episode 10: There's a Gate In The Floor

Fri, 14 Jun 2024 15:40:43 -0700

In which the dangers lurking in the barn begin to reveal themselves. And family dinner gets heated when the new neighbor drops by to borrow some hay.

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Episode 11: Everybody Loves Farmer Boy

Tue, 02 Jul 2024 22:06:29 -0700

In which some go totally Crackergoat, and some tell our Farmer Boy how they really feel.

Featuring an epic showdown between Sawyer, champion of the underdog, and Scott, the guy who can't be fussed to pick the soul of the underdog out of the cracks in his $900 sneakers.

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Episode 12: The Ascendance of Arcturix

Sun, 28 Jul 2024 19:21:31 -0700

In this Season Finale, the existing high caprine drama collides with the imagination and practical skills of a little brother on the move.

Will all the rising action be wrapped up? No, listeners, we are still in the middle of our saga, but this double episode will settle some questions and hopefully, leave you in bleeting eagerness for Season Two.

It's a long one! Double length, listen as you please at your own pace. Thanks for being our listeners.

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Introducing The Goat American Novel

Tue, 08 Oct 2024 12:40:55 -0700

Introducing the Goat American Novel, a gothic barnyard audio drama by subversive family storyteller Hilde Festerling.

S2 Episode 1: Take the Dog Out for Her Exorcism

Thu, 23 Jan 2025 16:20:31 -0800

We're back! The nanny goats rally around a plan to recover their missing kids by performing an exorcism on the farm dog. But are great love poems really capable of releasing the demon inside the dog?

Hilde's article on podcasting with her whole family

About the music of the Goat American Novel

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

S2 Episode Two: Eggplant Croquant

Fri, 07 Feb 2025 18:35:00 -0800

In which we catch up with the goats in the barn, and also check in at Millicent's house, where some goats may or may not be hidden in a blanket fort, and a man may or may not be screaming.

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Thanks as always to Ursula Buker, Gabriel Alden, Caleb Alden, Johnny Buker, Erin Alden, Courtney Lyons, Amanda Laughtland aka Myra Grass, the musicians of the Electric Unicorn sessions, and the Steam Brass Band for their ongoing excellent contributions!

Where to find me:

The Goat American Novel website: https://goatamericannovel.podbean.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goatamericannovel/

Bonus Episode: Marie Vinson, The World's Greatest Daredevil

Fri, 21 Feb 2025 21:22:51 -0800

In this bonus episode we hear the story of Marie Vinson, a Happy Meal doll who becomes the World's Greatest Daredevil. Regular Episodes of The Goat American Novel will return next week!

S2 Episode 3: Why Rams Great Till They Gotta Be Great?

Fri, 28 Feb 2025 18:37:00 -0800

In which the Milk and Wool Producing Society Convenes, Layla films the greatest Yousnap video of all time, and the wider world is lured into the drama unfolding in the four farms neighborhood.

S2 Episode 4: You Will Contain the Goats

Sat, 22 Mar 2025 20:07:34 -0700

You Will Contain the Goats: In which everyone seems to be on an ill-fated mission, and we see how the kids up in the barn are faring after their battle with the tiger.

Episode 5: Chores for Ghosts

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 11:12:42 -0700

In which Grazzo is compelled- by the ghost to ghost hotline- to return to the earthly realm to do some very important farm chores.

Thank you as always to our amazing cast, Ursula Buker Johnny Buker Gabriel Alden Caleb Alden, to the musicians of the electric unicorn studio session, and to you, the listener.

Live Show and Interview and Knott, a Podcast

Mon, 26 May 2025 14:55:57 -0700

Announcing our first Live Podcast Show! at Village Books in Bellingham June 07, pm. A free entertainment for families in the style of an old time Radio play... Reserve your seats here!

Also, this special episode contains our interview with friend-of-the-show Ben West, in which we get into the hows and whos and whys of The Goat American Novel.

Also: Check out our story about dolls on Knott, A Podcast. Andrew Knott is a very funny, very honest writer who speaks the humbling truth about being a writer/dad, and the tiny moments of everyday life which tell us who we are.

And Finally, Some Stories about making the podcast:

How To Podcast With Your Whole Family

Lessons in Audio from the Punk Warehouse

Creating the Soundtrack to a Novel

Regular Goat programing returns later this week!

S2 Episode Six: I'm Still Not Sure How This Restraining Order Thing Works

Mon, 02 Jun 2025 18:04:27 -0700

In which the Sawyer continues his attempts to contain the nanny goats, who continue their attempt to find the bottom of a barrel of cherry brandy,

And, FM deepens her acquaintance with her new vegan karaoke friends

And, Grazzo pulls Layla back into the rainy night for yet another spooky supernatural mission.... into the Westerly barn.

Come see our live show! June 07, 2pm, Village Books Fairhaven. It's an all-ages entertainment in the style of an old Radio play... Reserve your seat here!

Season 2 Episode Seven: Clover's Big Night

Thu, 19 Jun 2025 10:57:13 -0700

In which Clover the boss sheep shows up, Queen to Queen, we learn about 19th century patent medicine, and there is a gruesome but satisfying resolution to a neighborhood pest problem.

S2 Episode 8: The Russian Revolution

Mon, 07 Jul 2025 12:29:54 -0700

In which Mama Chichi finds some of her kids, Sawyer loses one of his, the pigs take leave of their senses or perhaps find all their marbles for the first time in their lives, and the farm is visited by a mysterious stranger from Goatko Ono's past...

Special thanks this week to the real FM, June Heggarty, and the channeled ghost of Thunder the Saanen billy goat.

S2 Episode 9: The Cart, The Cage, The Pulley, and The Ramp

Thu, 11 Sep 2025 15:07:54 -0700

The Cart, The Cage, The Pulley, and The Ramp, in which Arcturix, Clover the sheep, and the goat herd prepare to take this tiger situation into their own hooves. And Layla just really needs to focus on this garage sale right now.

The Goat American Novel is written and produced by Hilde Festerling. Guest voice actors this week were Blair Tothill and Miku Alden. Thanks as always to our incredible cast: Caleb Alden, Gabriel Alden, Johnny Buker, Ursula Buker, Erin Alden.

Thanks to the Steam Brass Band for our beautiful theme song, and to the musicians of the Electric Unicorn Studio Session for our in-episode music. Thanks to the foley artists of the Freesound.org community for some of these great sound effects.

S 2 Episode 10: Free Them All

Thu, 25 Sep 2025 21:57:54 -0700

The Ante-penultimate episode of the Goat American Novel, in which we all experience vicarious liberation through multiple instances and styles of setting-free.

This episode owes a heavy debt of gratitude to Limoncello band, and their magnificent cover of Sweet Dreams. We also thank our guest stars, Barn O'Brine, Brian Laughtland, and at long last..... Felix Buker.

S 2 Episode 11: To Trap a Tiger

Fri, 10 Oct 2025 18:51:36 -0700

The Penultimate Episode! In which our little heroes go eye to eye with the tiger!

Featuring the incredible music of the PS22 Chorus, check out the full video of their performance here

Bonus! Zipnog: Legend, Trickster, Recipe

Fri, 24 Oct 2025 15:48:04 -0700

A little bonus episode while you wait for the final chapter. I tell the absolutely true(!) story of the squirrel who became a legend by trashing our house.... and the Recipe she inspired. Perhaps you will enjoy a little cozy autumnal baking, as we did.

You can see the recipe and the Zipnog bars here.

(Scroll down to the bottom of the story for the recipe and images)

And yes, this story also stars another inspirational character from the Goat American Novel.... Arcturix I mean Felix I mean Billy Joel III

Season 2 Episode 12: The Last Chapter

Fri, 31 Oct 2025 15:07:39 -0700

The Final Episode of the Goat American Novel, in which all threads are tied up. We hope.

Our heart overflows with gratitude to all the actors, musicians, foley artists, organizers, pie bakers, technicians, and friends who made The Goat American Novel possible. The Goat American Novel was written, produced and performed by Hilde Festerling, but she could never have done it without her cast.

Our faithful home cast: Johnny Buker as Scott and Elmer, Gabriel Alden as Millicent and The Tiger, Caleb Alden as Sawer and Matteo the alpaca, Ursula Buker as Layla and Cohost, Erin Alden as co host, and Mandy Laughtland as Myra Grass and Ms Hammerstung.

This episode's guest stars: Ben West as Josaiah, Constance and Hank O'Hana as Rival Auctioneers, Courtney Lyons as Constable Courtney, Brian Laughtland as Grandpa Lizard, Glenn Alden as Billy Joel, and Felix Buker as The Ocelot.

Special shout out to the Real FM, Maryanne Mills, without whom this podcast would not exist.

Thanks also to the musicians of the Electric Unicorn Studio Session for our incredible transitional music, which we recorded almost three years ago, and which has never let us down. Thanks to The Steam Brass Band, for their perfect cover of Sweet Dreams that brought us in and took us home, every episode. This episode featured a vinyl cut of Clifford Brown's Stardust- the most perfect Stardust.

We also thank the many guest actors who have popped into the studio to deliver heartfelt sheep or influencer lines. Your legacy continues to ring.

Finally, we thank our listeners.

Bonus Episode: The Picture of Dorian Cat

Tue, 17 Feb 2026 20:10:00 -0800

What happens when a handsome cat meets a portrait of himself which is itself a bit too handsome?

For your enjoyment, the Goat American Novel presents The Picture of Dorian Cat, a stand-alone story about a cat and his lady. And their blanket. And a really good Fancy Feast commercial. Perhaps it will be better if we don't speak of Dorian's portrait here.... it is too powerful.

Featuring the voice talents of Hilde Festerling and Mandy Laughtland, the musical stylings of Leonard Leigh and the Mighty Wurlitzer organ from St Pauls' Paramount theater, and of course, the music of Tammy Wynette. Also the ghost of Oscar Wilde. Enjoy.

Bonus Episode: The Night for Make.Shift Gallery

Fri, 24 Apr 2026 14:19:24 -0700

In this very special bonus episode, we bring to life a story written by a young student writer/artist, for the Make.Shift Gallery Kids Art Walk.

My young collaborator has written a profound and beautiful story, a timeless mythology about art and hope. Our very special young voice actors, Olive Gemin and Ava Hubert, helped the story sparkle with humor and warmth. Collaborating with these three young artists has been a profound honor. If you are in Bellingham, come see the writer's illustration at the Make.Shift Gallery through May 2026!

Full Credits: Episode Produced by Hilde Festerling. Performed by Olive Gemin, Ava Hubert, Caleb Alden, Hilde Festerling, and Mandy Laughtland. The piece also makes use of Venus, Bringer of Peace, by Gustav Holst, performed by the New Philharmoic Orchestra; Mr Blue Sky, written by Jeff Lynne, performed by the Covid Cello Project, Chimes by Samuel Grimaud, and Found in Space by Speedenza. Cassette transfer by Paul Turpin. Thanks Paul!