Legendary Hollywood narrator, Chardonnay Wafflehutt, begins to unravel the actual audio diary of Dracula!

Bringing fear to the villages of Transylvania. Escaping ruthless Vatican-sanctioned enemies. And daring to taste forbidden love with the only woman to own Dracula's black heart, Gretchen Von Stroodlehymen.

Are you ready to embrace the Winkee...?

Opening fan mail only depresses the mega-boomer derp vampire more. Then, hope comes from his only friend-- Juan!

And you, dear listener, become very jealous. Because is your BFF an armadillo? NO! Yours is not. Praise be to Juan! 

Two men with hidden pasts meet in a most wicked place-- the tea & scone shop known as Yummy Tummy! One a holy warrior from the Ancient Order of the Prissy Unicorn. And the other a master spy and the only Vatican-sanctioned street pimp!

Who are the Enclave? What plans do they have to extinguish the Lord of the Undead once and for all? And will there be enough sticky buns?

There's a new girl in town. Visiting her aunt and uncle… from the far away land of America! Rumor has it she's eager to find out if the legendary passions of Dracula are for reals. And like all American women under 25, she's a virgin!

Will Miriam be the one who ends the Prince of Darkness' dickie drought?

To ensure we present a tender narrative about hippular friction, we have asked our male writers to take their dude bro pens out of the room. And we've turned this sexy, dangerous rendezvous over to highly-praised Erotica writer, Melissa Vanderhump.

Look away, listeners! This audio podcast is sassy.

Sit in on a meeting with THE ENCLAVE. Plans are set in stone. The net is cast. And scones are served.

All this... and Flathead Kate!

You're welcome.

As always, Juan is there to pick up the pieces. But most importantly, we finally answer your #1 fan request--- Chad the Hippie Werewolf pays a visit!

It's full moon fever, shrouded in a fog bank of weed.

Chardonnay Wafflehutt hijacks the recording studio!

And legendary TV gameshow host, Sparky Guidonian, puts the pressure on the Enclave to name the Top 3 Destinations Dracula might escape to in America.

If you can guess them, loyal listener, you win a dream date with Sparky!

At last, the story of their forbidden love plays out! Questions are answered. Fates are determined. Do wishful winkees and hopeful hoo-has live happily ever after?

Plus Chardonnay Wafflehutt shares his own romantic night with ABBA.

That's in your head now. Forever.

Will Juan's plan to get Dracula to America work? Can he survive traveling economy class? And who is the enemy hot on his trail?

Grab your Winkee! It's the Grand Finale!

Are the ancient audio recordings found in Transylvania the diary of Dracula? Did the two brothers who discovered them really follow an armadillo into a cave? Who are Teabag McJoy, SD P'Tang, and the Secret Sisterhood of the Divine Travelling Ya-Yas?

And most importantly, is it possible that Dracula still exists today?

Are you ready for the truth? We also have pizza rolls. Mmm. Pizza rolls. 

"Dracula's Winkee is like a pinball machine. The comedy comes from everywhere and never where you expect it!"

"I laughed so much, I listened two times, just to catch everything!"

"The biggest evil is I have to wait for Season Two now!" 

Hosted by legendary Hollywood narrator, Chardonnay Wafflehutt, with presenters Teabag McJoy, SD P'Tang, and Juan the armadillo! Special appearances by Sister Agnes and the Prince of Darkness himself, Dracula!

DW S1 is a secret code only Winkee Huggers can break.

BFF Juan gives his weekly affirmation. Questions are answered in Ask Chardonnay! And we join in prayer with the matriarch of the Secret Sisterhood of the Divine Traveling Ya-Yas, the Mo Fo Superior, Sister Agnes.

Bring it in, Winkee Huggers! 

The Prince of Darkness. Holy warrior nuns and Vatican-sanctioned street pimps. And forbidden lust at a time long before OnlyFans. 

Whether you're looking to binge something new, or Winkee Huggers hungry for more, legendary Hollywood narrator, Chardonnay Wafflehutt, brings you all 10 episodes of DRACULA'S WINKEE SEASON ONE!