The Adoption and Fostering Podcast

Episode 225(?) - Scott and Al talk Adoption Consultations & the Adoption Forum.

Sat, 18 Apr 2026 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of the A&F podcast, we unpack the fallout of our Canada trip and answer a question from a listener. Over the last few weeks there's been a few consultations for the DfE by Adoption England, we unpack some of that and the recent Adoption Forum event looking at the legal guidance around maintaining family links.

As always if you’ve experience of adoption, fostering or special guardianship from any perspective personal or professional and would like share that on the podcast please get in touch through the Facebook page, BlueSky or email us at AandFpodcast@gmail.com

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Converstations - Adoptive Parent Dallas

Sat, 11 Apr 2026 06:14:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the AandF podcast.

In this episode I speak to Dallas a parent through adoption who lives in Canada she shares the experience of adopting two children and the impact of caring for children with complex and challenging behaviour on her relationship with her husband and beyond. Dallas is frank about her circumstances and the difficulties that she faces and regardless of the context and country.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us Episode 35 - Positive Dosing

Tue, 07 Apr 2026 06:14:00 +0100

In this episode we are talking about positive dosing - the small, consistent, positive interactions that help children who have experienced trauma, loss, or instability begin to build self-worth, trust, and connection.

We explore why positive attention matters more than we often realise and explore the simple, realistic ways carers and parents can build connection into everyday moments. We also recognise that as adults, we need a bit of positive dosing too, so it’s worth thinking about this in your own life with friends, family and colleagues as small positive interactions matter for everyone.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Website- www.bettermebetterus.co.uk

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Conversations - Mary-Joy Johnson Integrative Psychotherapist

Sat, 04 Apr 2026 06:17:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the AandF podcast.

In this episode I speak to a former guest Mary-Joy Johnson founder of Wildways therapy and an integrative psychotherapist whose work focuses on supporting adoptive parents. This is a really helpful conversation considering the impact of trauma on parents and considers where that comes from as well as changing the narrative of self care to one of community care. I hope you find it useful and if you want to know more of the work she does you can access Mary-Joy’s website here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Canada Road Tip - Pt2 Reflections

Sat, 28 Mar 2026 06:08:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the second podcast from our Canada road trip. In this episode we reflect on a few of the conversations we had with the team from Interwoven Connections. They support families formed though adoption, fostering, kinship and customary care and have a huge knowledge base around FASD and CPV (AFCCA). We were given much to think of and we unpack it as well as being a little giddy at being in the same room for the 8th day in a row!

You can listen to Tanya Dugay's interview from my Churchill Fellowship here.

As always, if you’ve experience of adoption, fostering or special guardianship from any perspective personal or professional and would like share that on the podcast please get in touch through the Facebook page, BlueSky or email us at AandFpodcast@gmail.com

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Scott & Al's Canada Road Trip - Pt1

Sat, 21 Mar 2026 06:18:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the this Canada road trip podcast, in this first episode we stitch together our 'on the road' recordings as we jollied our way around Ontario and Quebec in Canada.

It's pretty flippant and catches on the road with a few instant reflections on Canada, each other and some of the people we met. In the next episode we unpack our time in Smith Falls and Ottawa with a few members of the Interwoven Connections team as well as some broader issues.

Scott also recorded an interview with the Hamilton FASD Collaborative and we'll be releasing that soon.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Converstations WwF - Rachel Staff Talks Parenting Teenagers

Sat, 14 Mar 2026 03:20:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the AandF podcast.

In this episode we’ve a recording of a Walking with Families peer support group sessions with social worker Rachel Staff. Rachel has broad experience of working with and supporting parents of teenagers. In this session she unpacks some of that insight with adoptive parents and considers the impact of early adversity on normal teenage challenges.

You can connect with Rachel here

If you’re an adoptive parent and would like to join the Walking with Families Facebook community here or the online sessions here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us - Episode 34- Identity

Tue, 10 Mar 2026 03:12:00 +0000

This month we explore identity. With International Identity Day, International Day of Happiness and Mother’s Day all taking place this month, we reflect on how identity develops and how our experiences and relationships shape the way we see ourselves.

We talk about the importance of checking things out with someone rather than making assumptions, and how creating safe, supportive spaces allows children and young people to explore who they are and feel able to be their authentic selves.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Website- www.bettermebetterus.co.uk

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

FASD - Tris Casson Rennie

Sat, 07 Mar 2026 03:46:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the AandF podcast.

In this recording adoptive parent and founder of FASD Ireland shares his family's story and unpacks the realities, challenges and some of the solutions to parenting a child with FASD

This is a different kind of episode, in January Tris Casson Rennie joined one one the peer support group sessions that I host with Walking with Families. We are a community of adoptive parents who are living with challenging behaviour and Tris is an adoptive parent and the founder of FASD Ireland. In this session he was able to unpack Feotal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder - FASD- with us and help us make sense of behaviour and what can help with that. He gives a pocket sized training then answers some of the questions from the community.

You can find out more of the work that Tris and his husband Scott do here FASD Ireland.

If you’re an adoptive parent and would like to join the community. Below is the link to the joining form, we meet weekly online on Monday lunchtimes as well as during the month in the evenings.

https://forms.office.com/e/drdn16BLZ2

We also have a FB group that will be part of the community and you can join that here.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1620682492650215/

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Richard McCombe- Adoptive Parent

Sat, 28 Feb 2026 08:12:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the AandF podcast.

In this episode I speak to Richard McCombe an adoptive parent. He shares his family’s experience of adoption including the challenges that they have faces caring for children with complex needs and complex behaviour. Richard lives in Scotland and the different aspects of that experiences are also shared.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Fiona wells - The Journey of the Child

Sat, 21 Feb 2026 06:03:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to this special edition of the Fostering and Adoption podcast

On the 12th February Patch held their first in person conference in Liverpool bringing together adoptive parents, adult adoptees and professionals from the adoption arena. Fiona Wells is the founder and a driving force behind Patch and here is a recording of her morning keynote presentation on the “Journey of the Child.”

If you want to know more about the work of Patch you can find that here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 234 - Adoption Announcement, ASGSF and Foster Care isn't a Job!

Sat, 14 Feb 2026 06:22:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast with Scott Casson-Rennie AMBII and Al Coates.

This was recorded the day of the Children's Minister's announcement on the Adoption & Special Guardianship Support Fund and the announcement of a consultation. So, after a little banter we get right into it and unpack our views on it. Frankly we pull no punches and throw caution to the wind of ever getting Josh Mac on the podcast.

We also unpack the announcement for an extra 10,000 carers and after a short pause we get onto the issue of is foster caring a job!

Below is the link to the FASD Ireland conference. A limited number of Early Bird tickets are now available - secure your place today: www.fasdireland.ie/conference

If you're an adoptive parent and are wanting to join the 'Walking with Families' online FB group you can join here

if you want to sign up to the weekly online support meetings for adopters caring for children with challenging behaviour you can do so here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us Episode 33 - Love

Tue, 10 Feb 2026 07:26:34 +0000

As February is the month of love, we thoughts we’d explore what love really means especially in the context of adoption and fostering.

What does love look like in real life? How do our different love languages shape the way we give and receive? And how does trauma affect the way children and adults experience love, connection, and safety?

We reflect on the powerful truth that while love is vital, love alone does not heal trauma and consider what children and families need alongside love.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Website- www.bettermebetterus.co.uk

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Conversations - Dr Maude Champagne - Recovery when your child leaves home

Sat, 07 Feb 2026 06:14:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the AandF podcast.

In this episode to Dr Maude Champagne , social worker, psychotherapist and NVR practitioner who works in adoption and foster care. Specifically she works with parents who are experiencing violence and aggression and I asked her on to talk about parents experience of recovery once children, who are challenging, leave the home.

There are links to her work below:

Recovery When Your Child who is aggressive no Longer Lives at Home

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 223 - Social media bans and self care for men of a certain age.

Sat, 31 Jan 2026 06:11:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to this episode of from the AandF podcast.

This episode is unofficially sponsored by Sainsbury's Supermarket.

In this episode we unpack the pros and cons of social media bans and the specific challenges that many parents and carers of children with complex early lives and SEN face.

We also get somewhat distracted by some self care and purchasing choices. We would welcome the findings of your Nectar app purchases.

Below is the link to the FASD Ireland conference. A limited number of Early Bird tickets are now available - secure your place today: www.fasdireland.ie/conference

If you're an adoptive parent and are wanting to join the 'Walking with Families' online FB group you can join here

if you want to sign up to the weekly online support meetings for adopters caring for children with challenging behaviour you can do so here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Suzanne Scott - T.I.P

Sat, 24 Jan 2026 06:05:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the AandF podcast.

In this episode I speak with Suzanne Scott, she is the founder of Trauma informed parenting based in Scotland. Suzanne supports parents and professionals to move from fear and control to a trauma informed approach to strengthen relationships with children and affect change in them. She shares her own experience of parenting children with complex needs as well as being a foster carer and not the work she does across the UK.

Here are some links to Suzanne's work.

https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1ZmGwbMA28/?mibextid=wwXIfr

Website

https://www.traumainformedparenting.uk/

Eventbrite

https://www.eventbrite.com/o/25265000625

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 222 - New Year New Hosts - Paula and Tris

Sat, 17 Jan 2026 06:06:00 +0000

Hello and welcome the AandF podcast, it the New Year so our better halves,Paula and Tris, join us to catch up on the year and join the banter.

We unpack the year and catch up with them and after a slow start we discuss the challenges and new experience of parenting adult children with the subsequent surprising rewards. At no point is there any marital strife!

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us Episode 32 - Own It

Tue, 13 Jan 2026 06:07:00 +0000

In this episode we explore the responsibility adults and professionals carry to own their behaviours, words, and actions, especially when working with children. From everyday interactions to moments of conflict and repair, we unpack why accountability is not about perfection, but integrity.

We discuss how children learn more from what we model than what we say, why owning mistakes builds trust and emotional safety, and how this is especially vital in fostering and adoption, where many children have experienced broken promises and unmet accountability.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Converations - Nick, Tiegan and the Adoption Satisfaction Survey

Sat, 10 Jan 2026 06:06:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the AandF podcast.

In this episode I speak to adult adoptee Tiegen Boyens and social worker/researcher Nick Burke. They are undertaking research examining the adoptee quality of life for those between 16 and 25. Tiegan and Nick unpack the reason behind the research and how the topics and questions were identified though focus group with a range of adoptees.

You can access the survey here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Adoption Disruption - Adoptive parent & SW Amy

Sat, 03 Jan 2026 06:25:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the A&F Podcast. In this episode we're continuing to look at parenting from a distance and adoption disruption. It's a hugely sensitive matter with the impact on children adults and professionals often being catastrophic.

Here, I speak to Amy an adoptive parent and social worker and she describes the events that led to crisis and the response of the system.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode of the Year - 206 FASD with Anna Webster

Sat, 27 Dec 2025 06:14:00 +0000

This episode resinated with so many of our listeners. Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder remains under discussed with a growing understanding of the prevalence and impact that many children are living with.

In this episode of the A&F podcast we speak to adoptive parent and Neurodiversity Coaching Psychologist Anna Webster. She shares her experience of parenting a child with a diagnosis of Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder and the development of the Neurowise Programme on Therapeutic Caregiving for FASD.

It is a genuinely fascinating chat and we both drew lots of new information and thinking about the role of parents and the specific challenges parents and carers of children with FASD face.

Anna is on X here

and Linkedin here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Christmas Podcast with Fiona Wells from Patch

Sat, 20 Dec 2025 06:27:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the AandF podcast Christmas special.

In this episode we streamed live to Facebook and chat with Fiona Wells from Patch.

We unpack all that's been happening with the raised awareness of the levels of adversity all members of adoptive households are having. There is a crisis in the adoption community and Fiona has spearheaded the news and bringing of many families together.

Oh, and it's Christmas we share our top tips! It's a little raucous but that's how we roll.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Helio, Adult International Adoptee

Sat, 13 Dec 2025 06:32:27 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the AandF podcast.

In this episode I speak with Helio an adult adoptee, he shares his experience of being adopted from Brazil to an Italian family. There’s so much more to his story and as an adult he went onto what was a complex journey to reconnect with his biological mother. His resilience and the murky circumstances of his adoption are remarkable and it’s well worth a listen.

You can follow Helio on instagram here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us Ep 31 - Back to basics

Tue, 09 Dec 2025 06:52:00 +0000

In this episode, we explore the importance of stripping everything back to the basics and showing up on a truly human level. It’s these foundations, warmth, consistency, repair and presence, that create safety and stability for our most traumatised children. We also reflect on how powerful our modelling is: what we, as professionals, model to parents and carers, and what they in turn model to the children in their care. When we get the basics right, everything else becomes possible.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Episode 221 - Adoption Crisis and More

Sat, 06 Dec 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to this episode of the adoption and fostering podcast. With the wide ranging coverage in the news of the UK's adoption crisis we focus in on that in this episode as well as the response from adoption agencies and the children's minister.

There's a lot to unpack but we give it a go and then have a little chat about the drop in foster carers in the UK and the review announced in to mental health and neurodiversity diagnosis announced.

BBC Adoption Crisis here

Debate in Parliament transcript here

Walking with Families Peer support here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conference Report - The Adoption Forum

Sat, 29 Nov 2025 06:03:00 +0000

On the 19th November Al was invited to attend a conference in London organised by The Adoption Forum and this is his on the hoof podcast. Their goal is to bridge law, policy, and lived experience and to turn research and policy into practical, down to earth strategies that support children, families, and the professionals who work with them.

You can follow them on Linkedin here

Al was able to speak to attendees and contributors, Anthea Benjamin, Mike Hancock from PAC UK , Sarah Beskine, Sophie Hill and Azariah Hope.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Foster Carer Amelie

Sat, 22 Nov 2025 06:06:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast.

In this episode I speak to former foster carer and author Amelie. She shares her family story of a serious allegation made against them that led to her own children being removed from her care. It’s a stark account and Amelie’s book, Broken, recounts that experience. Amelie is passionate to see change and help build a system that manages allegations better.

You can read Amelie's book here and follow her on instagram here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 220 - Dads' Mental Health - Movember

Sat, 15 Nov 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the AandF podcast.

*Warning!*

We will be leaning into gender stereotypes.

So, it's been a while since we had a proper natter so we catch up then dive into the tricky issue of mens'/dads' mental health and the specific challenges that adoption may bring. We think about blocked care and post adoption depression as well as consider how we access support and if we even want it?

Here's a link to the research we reference around adoptive dads and if you're interested in joining Al's online peer support for adoptive parent caring for children with challenging behaviour follow this link and we'll share the details of the open groups and the dads' groups with you. There's also a FB group you can join here.

Better Me Better Us Ep 30 - Professional Relationships

Tue, 11 Nov 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Podcast 30 - Professional Relationships In this episode, we explore the power and complexity of professional relationships - how they shape our ability to ask for help, to trust, and to be trusted. We look at the systems we work within, and how they can both nurture and hinder the relationships we need to do our best work. As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Conversations - How to start a Foster Care Agency with Dan Boxall-Simpson

Sat, 08 Nov 2025 06:06:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the AandF podcast.

In this episode I speak to Dan Boxall-Simpson, he’s returned to the podcast to update us on the progress of EPIC Fostering the independent foster care agency he is in the process of setting up. He shares some of the challenges of navigating the process, Ofsted applications and more. It’s interesting to find out why now is a good time to do this and chat about their ethos and vision as a not for profit agency.

You can find out more about EPIC and EPIC family CIC here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Adoption Disruption - Vicki McKeown, social worker, counsellor and panel member

Sat, 01 Nov 2025 06:06:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast.

In this episode we’re focusing our gaze on the issue of adoption disruption. It’s a hugely sensitive subject matter with the impact on children, adults and professionals often being catastrophic.

Here I speak to Vicki McKeown psychotherapeutic Counsellor at VLM Therapy Ltd & Director at Better Me Better Us Ltd, social worker and panel member. She has broad experience of working with adopted children and their parents and shares insight to the causes and impacts across the system.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Converations. Andy Wallis adult adoptee.

Sat, 25 Oct 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast.

In this episode I speak to adoptee Andy Wallis. We talk about his experience of being an adoptee and the impact on his mental health in adulthood. This is a thought provoking conversation and Andy is honest about the the complexity of being an adoptee. Andy blogs on the subject as well as having told parts of his story in his book Who's Wally? Adoption, Brian, and Me.

Website: www.whoswally.co.uk

📸 Instagram and TikTok: @whoswally73

📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/andy.wallis.3572

🔗 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andy-wallis-865ab6195/

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Wednesday Webcast - Adoption State of the Nation Conversation

Thu, 23 Oct 2025 06:06:00 +0100

I speak to Fiona Wells, social worker, #adopter, #adoptee and #adoption reform campaigner about where we are this #NationalAdoptionWeek.

We talk all things adoption, trends, contact, the good and the bad. It's an engaging chat and you can see the comments on Al's FB page here.

Patch's even can be found through their website here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Adoption Disruption - Charlotte Jenkins, Adoption Disruption Meeting Chair.

Sat, 18 Oct 2025 06:05:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast.

As part of our look at the issue of adoption disruption in this episode I chat to Charlotte Jenkins. She is the founder of Beacon Family Services but acting as an independent social worker chairs adoption disruption meetings. It’s a hugely sensitive subject matter and Charlotte explains how bringing together professionals and parents they can potentially make sense of what has happened, she also draws out themes that she has observed doing what is challenging work.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us: Ep 29 Different Lenses

Tue, 14 Oct 2025 06:05:00 +0100

This month we’re exploring how our different lenses - our lived experiences, values, and professional knowledge, shape the way we see and interpret behaviour. They influence how we respond, the language we use, and even whether we view something as needing a safeguarding referral or as an opportunity for support and connection.

By becoming aware of our own lenses and being open to those of others, we can create a shared understanding that keeps curiosity, empathy, and the child at the centre of our practice.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Conversations - Parenting from a Distance with Adoptive parent Cath

Sat, 11 Oct 2025 06:05:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast.

In this episode I speak to adoptive parent Cath who is parenting from a distance, a position that many adoptive families find themselves in. Often parents struggled to meet the complex and high needs of children with the challenges of ensuring children remain safe also added into the mix. When this happens it can characterised as a breakdown or an adoption disruption, however as Cath’s story indicates the separation is often necessary to ensure any chance of an ongoing relationship between children and parents. However, getting service to acknowledge and see the needs of children and parents can be challenging to say the least.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Kinship Week Special - The Voices of Kinship Children with Dr Paul Shuttleworth

Thu, 09 Oct 2025 06:05:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to our Kinship week live with Dr Paul Shuttleworth. We chat about the voices of children and Dr Paul's new book, Listening to Children about Kinship care, child welfare and permanence.

You can download the book for free here and please do as Dr Paul worked hard to ensure it was available at no cost and we want to support the excellent work he's doing.

We do chat more broadly about Kinship and the state of the broader context.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Adoption Disruption - Fiona Wells, adopter, adoptee and founder of PATCH

Wed, 08 Oct 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast.

Here I speak to Fiona Wells, Adult adoptee, adoptive parent, social worker and director of PATCH She has direct experience of the challenges that families can face as well as bringing together many families looking to improve the adoption and care system having experienced difficult interactions with it.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 219 - Kinship Report, Disruption Research and Bantz

Sat, 04 Oct 2025 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of the A&F podcast, we're on the cusp of Kinship week so we look a the report published this week "Handle With Care: Annual survey of kinship carers 2025" view here. Parts of it dovetail with the DfE's Family Routes: Children who return to care research which we discuss and you can view here.

Of course we banter around the issues and unpack our takes, or attempts at takes, on the reports.

If you're an adoptive parent and struggling with challenging behaviour you can join the Walking with Families FB group here.

FASD Ireland's research can be viewed here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Adoption Disruption - Solicitor Nigel Priestly

Wed, 01 Oct 2025 06:02:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast.

Over the coming episodes we’re focusing our gaze on the issue of adoption disruption. It’s a hugely sensitive subject matter and we’ve talked to a range of people and professionals impacted by it, we haven’t spoken to children or adult adoptees. That’s more a reflection on our network not a policy decision.

Here I speak to solicitor Nigel Priestley from Ridley and Hall, he is an adoptive parent and has focused his work on supporting adoptive parents navigate what can be a very challenging process when children can no longer live at home.

It is to hard listen to the challenges families face and Nigel offers insight as to the impact on them and the difficulties that they face.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Adoption Disruption - Ruth's story

Sat, 27 Sep 2025 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast.

Over the next episodes we’re focusing our gaze on the issue of adoption disruption. It’s a hugely sensitive subject matter with the impact on children, adults and professionals often being catastrophic. We’ve talked to social workers, adoptive parents, adult adoptees, solicitors and adoptive parents but not children.

Here I speak to Ruth and she shares her experience of disruption pre adoption order. It is a hard listen but I’m sure you agree it highlights some of the systemic challenges families face as well as the lifelong impact on everyone in the home.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 218 - Adoption Barometer, New Minister & Becky Brooks

Sat, 20 Sep 2025 06:12:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this, what feels like a marker in the year, episode looking at the 2025 Adoption Barometer (click here). We get AUK’s Becky Brooks on to run us through what we know and new stuff.

We unpack some of the news before we get to that, ie a new children’s minister, FASD Ireland’s very exciting new report (click here) and Al’s peer support community, Walking with Families, (click here).

Becky brings real insight personally and professionally and she opens up the data as well as analysis some of the bigger issues that come up in the conversation. It’s a great chat that get’s into some interesting areas.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations Caitlyn Newblé CEO and founder of All in the therapy of music

Sat, 13 Sep 2025 06:00:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode I speak to Caitlyn Newblé the CEO and founder of All in the therapy of music. She shares her experience of the transformational influence music brought to her. Her vision is to make music accessible and affordable by bringing experienced and advanced musicians into schools.

You can visit her website here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here

Spotify here

Google here

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

Episode 28 - Violence Against Women and Girls

Tue, 09 Sep 2025 06:12:31 +0100

This month’s podcast is all about Violence Against Women and Girls (VAWG).

It’s a tough but really important conversation. We chat about how this issue shows up in the lives of children and young people, especially in schools and online, and why it matters so much for those of us working with or parenting children and young people.

It’s not about policy or box-ticking, it’s about the real impact, the human side, and what we can do to make sure kids feel safe, supported and believed. As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Episode 217 - Conversation with Bryan Post

Sat, 06 Sep 2025 06:05:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode, a conversation with Bryan Post.

We were delighted to get the opportunity to speak to him at the end of August. He was a generous guest and shares some of his personal experience and his professional expertise. Bryan has authored many books, trained professionals and has inspired many adoptive parents as he shares from his life, practice and extensive knowledge. We also chatted about his latest ai project and you can catch up with all he does here.

Between recording and now an awful lot has happened for the boys. You can find out more about Al's funded peer support project here and as soon as FASD Ire release their report we'll share the details. We tried to keep our intro short but there was a lot to unpack!

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Churchill Fellowship - Tracy Moisan Director of the National Consortium on AFCCA, Canada

Sat, 30 Aug 2025 06:04:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this follow on episode of my Churchill Fellowship.

In this episode I speak to Tracy Moisan from Canada who is the national director of the National Consortium on Aggression Towards Family / Caregivers in Childhood & Adolescence (AFCCA). The Consortium exists to increase awareness of AFCCA across Canada, to amplify the voices of youth and their families, and to mobilize knowledge in ways that affects policy, systems, services, research, and professional practice to improve the lives of youth experiencing AFCCA and their families. Tracy has a wealth of experience and absolute insight the challenges families face and this is a fascinating discussion.

The Consortium's website is here www.afcca-apfea.ca

Churchill Fellowship update: Karine Tremblay - Filial Trauma

Sat, 23 Aug 2025 07:41:28 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast.

A few months ago I was contacted by Karine Tremblay an adoptive parent, social worker and researcher in relation to her work on the impact of living with children with challenging and aggressive behaviour. So, we arranged to speak, it’s a conversation and topic that sits really comfortably within the remit of my Churchill Fellowship and Karine’s description of ‘filial trauma’ will be recognised by parents, carers and professionals.

Karine is French Canadian but her work is transferable to all who live or work in this field regardless of geography.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 215 - Dee Mills talks Education

Sat, 16 Aug 2025 06:20:00 +0100

In this episode we speak to Dee Mills, she's an adoptive parent and had written a book 'Your Adopted Child at School: Making The Right Choices & Getting The Education They Need' drawing on her extensive challenges as an adoptive parent with the school system. Dee is certainly not anti school but full of useful tips and advice born from lots of interaction with teachers and schools. We had a cracking chat and it raised lots of issues and memories for us as well.

Dee's book can be found here. https://amzn.to/40riO06

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 27 - Surviving the school holidays

Tue, 12 Aug 2025 06:23:00 +0100

In this episode, we’re talking all things school holidays and how to support children through long stretches of unstructured time while gently stretching their independence.

We explore why holidays can feel overwhelming for some children (especially those with trauma histories or neurodivergence, how to build skills and resilience without pushing too far, the importance of strong, safe relationships—so if things go wrong, you can talk it through and why your support network matters just as much as the routine.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Conversations - Dr Maude Champagne

Sat, 09 Aug 2025 06:13:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode I speak Dr Maude Champagne from Interwovern connections based in Ontario Canada. Following on from her PHD Maude in collaboration with other professionals she has written what is, in my opinion, an excellent book. It’s called DECODING AGGRESSION, COMPLEX BEHAVIOURS AND BRAIN-BASED DISABILITIES and the link is in the show notes. It’s a practical book looking a supporting families and it’s strength is it comes from a range of perspectives to do that.

Maude is an author who has also lived experience and brings that to bare in her work.

Episode 214 - Euan Preston and Gillian Elam from the Potato Group

Sat, 02 Aug 2025 06:06:00 +0100

In this episode we speak to Euan Preston and Gillian Elam from the Potato Group. They recently published their report 'Far, Far Beyond the Adoption Order: Lessons From Lives Impacted by Trauma' drawing on the experiences of 400+ adoptive families. The report highlight some of the complexities and challenges faced by children and parents accessing appropriate support and how services struggle to manage crisis and when adoptive children can no longer live at home.

You can visit Potato's website here and download the reports here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Wednesday Webcast with Vicki McKeown & Lisa Etherson

Thu, 31 Jul 2025 06:03:00 +0100

In this episode we chat to Vicki McKeown & Lisa Etherson about the tricky subject of Shame. Drawing on their professional experiences and practice as well as Lisa's Phd they have co authored the children's book "Jake and his Shame Armour. We discuss aspects of shame and how it is linked to attachment and can influence behaviour. As always there's a bit of frivolity and chaos as we try to get the live machine to work.

You can buy the book here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Churchill Fellowship pt 4 Follow up - An interview with Lee Tempest from NZ

Wed, 30 Jul 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to what is a follow up to the conversation I had with Lee Tempest in the summer of 2024. I spoke to her then in relation to the understanding and support being offered to families living with children with challenging and violent behaviour in New Zealand. Lee works for VisAble a national charity and has authored the first survey across New Zealand looking at families experiences of child to parent violence and abuse and in this interview she shares the findings and the work that there is to do.

You can listen to her first interview here and visit VisAble’s website here and read the report

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Webcast with Helen Wills and Sarah Fry from the Belay Foundation

Sat, 26 Jul 2025 06:03:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast.

In this episode Scott and Al speak to Sarah and Helen from the Belay Foundation. They help families access disability benefits as well as in home support.

Here's a their info

The Belay Foundation

In case you are inspired to find out more ...

website https://thebelayfoundation.org.uk/

- To help them in the future the survey they've launched to get input on our future services is here:

https://forms.office.com/e/EDfKWKgntV (and the intro video is here: https://vimeo.com/1094294617)

They are a charity so if you have any pennies to donate then justgiving.com/charity/thebelayfoundation

(OR you can donate to Helen's year-long #Belay2025in2025 fundraising challenge here: justgiving.com/page/belay2025in2025)

Thank you for helping us share what we do!

Conversations - Nakole Wooley, adopter & Swer

Sat, 19 Jul 2025 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast.

In this episode I speak to Nakole Wooley, parent education & cultivate connection facilitator, licensed social worker, formed foster carer and adoptive parent through kinship. Nakole got in touch to talk about the challenges that adoptive families face specifically in relation to adoption disruption and that’s where the conversation starts.

You can find out more and view Nakole's website here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 213 - Adoption Grandparenting, Disruption and Bantz

Sat, 12 Jul 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the 213th Episode (not the 113th as introduced!).

We catch up and unpick some of the latest news including the quality of the Gov's communication, upcoming disruption interviews and the experience of being a grandparent through adoption and the, perhaps, unique aspects of that role.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better You Episode 26 – Natural Networks

Tue, 08 Jul 2025 06:09:00 +0100

In this months episode, Vicki and Haley talk about preparations for the summer holidays, the heat, the lack of routine and the changes that are coming after. It’s a lot for any parent and carer to manage and so we explore the need for preparing for that with our people, our network, our tribe to prevent breakdowns or at least minimise those difficult times and give us the energy to be the best carers we can.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Conversations - Adoptive parent Izzy and PDA

Sat, 05 Jul 2025 06:14:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to Conversations from the A&F podcast

In this episode I speak to adoptive parent and former foster carer Izzy, she shares her experience of adopting a child that she fostered as well as her experience of realising that her child was living with Pathological Demand Avoidance.

Izzy explains PDA and how it impacts children and families as well as sharing her own journey to running support groups and working to support other adoptive parents working to meet the needs of their children with PDA.

You can access the PDA website here and Izzy's Facebook page 'PDA in Adoptive Families' here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 212 - Dr Chris Burke Safe and Meaningful Contact

Sat, 28 Jun 2025 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to episode 212 of the adoption and fostering podcast, as we creep into the summer madness is upon us so due to scheduling challenges we’re releasing an interview that we had with Dr Chris Burke in May with no #InfoBanter.

The issue of maintaining family links for children remains a complex one with everybody around children often having strong feelings, worries and concerns about what is in the best interests of children and how we should address the challenges. Chris has created a model for organising decisions around safe and meaningful contact for professionals and in this interview we discussed the hows and the whys.

You can see Chris' website here

We’ll be back to normal in the coming weeks, so stay well and as always if you’ve experience of adoption, fostering or special guardianship from any perspective personal or professional and would like share that on the podcast please get in touch through the Facebook page, BlueSky or email us at AandFpodcast@gmail.com

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Adoptive Parent Amiee

Sat, 21 Jun 2025 09:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to Conversations from the A&F podcast

In this episode I speak to adoptive parent Amiee, with her husband she proactively chose adoption and she shares their journey so far. We talk about the challenge of being linked with a child and the difficulties they experienced prior to finding their child.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 211 - Adoption Morals and Ethics

Sat, 14 Jun 2025 06:07:00 +0100

In this episode of the A&F podcast we have a quick catch up then throw ourselves into the murky world of adoption and ethics. We may have fallen at the first hurdle but we are speaking as adoptive parents and we look specifically a the balance of morals and ethics within this world. We're not high minded lads so it's pretty rudimentary but we consider some of the challenged and consider the role of pragmatism. The court case we mention can be found here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us Episode 25: What Does "Home" Really Mean?

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 06:06:00 +0100

In this episode we talk about the idea of home. What does home mean to us, as individuals, as parents, as professionals? Is it a place, a person, a feeling?

We reflect on how our own experiences shape the way we support children and young people especially, those where home hasn’t always felt safe or secure. For care-experienced young people, home can be a complex and loaded idea, something longed for, feared, or never truly known.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Conversations - Adoptive parent Julie

Sat, 07 Jun 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to Conversations from the A&F podcast

In this episode I speak to adoptive parent Julie, she became a foster carer then adopted as a solo carer and has experience working as a professional in mental health and social care. Julie shares her experience and the challenges as professional dropped away as the local authority team moved to a regional adoption agency as well as the benefits of the adoption support fund.

Julie now support other families like hers through the not for profit Nurture Hub Therapy Service that she founded working with birth parents, adopters, and foster carers, understanding the unique complexities that these families face.

Julie writes:

'Nurture Hub is a specialist counselling and support organisation founded by Julie Ingram, a parent carer with an adopted daughter who has a background in social care and mental health. Nurture Hub Therapy Service works with birth parents, adopters, and foster carers, and we totally understand the unique complexities that these families face. The service is strictly not for profit offering low cost counselling and therapeutic groups to parents.

For more info don't hesitate to get in touch with the team via the website www.nurturehubtherapyservice.co.uk'

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations: Dan, foster carer and Special Guardian

Sat, 31 May 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to Conversations from the A&F podcast

In this episode I speak to Dan Boxall_Simpson a Foster Carer, special guardian and fostering panel member

Dan shares his experience of becoming a foster carer with his husband and how that opened up many of the things that came afterwards including the decision to become a special guardian for two of the children they fostered. Dan is now in the process of starting an independent foster care agency through a community interest company in his area to meet the needs of vulnerable children where he lives.

Website www.epicfamilycic.co.uk

Facebook here

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 210 - FASD Ireland Conference

Sat, 24 May 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast, we're in the same country so after a very busy day at the FASD Ireland Conf we took to bed (think Morecambe and Wise) and unpacked the day's events as well as catching up with the latest news from the world of adoption and fostering and house moves!

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Tristian, Care Experienced Adult

Sat, 17 May 2025 08:17:32 +0100

Hello and welcome to Conversations from the A&F podcast In this episode I speak to Tristian Smith a US care experienced adult. He shares his vivid experience of coming into the care system after a difficult kinship care arrangement. Tristian with his brother moved several times, experienced a failed adoption and then separation from his young er brother. It’s a difficult listen as he shares his story. Tristian now looks to support and encourage other young people in the care system and has written his experiences in his book Against All Odds.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Churchill Fellowship Report Part 3: Walking with Families - Therapeutic Respite & Intervention

Sat, 10 May 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this third episode of Al's Churchill Fellowship. You can read the full report here.

In this podcast I reflect on conversations with carers and practitioners that support parents and children in the context of respite arrangements. It is a model of practice rarely seen in the UK and not available from statutory support services. The model of intervention explored from two settings in North America raised questions about perceptions of family and how intervening to rebuild and reform families can be an affective solution for some.

‘I came to the conclusion, if parents aren’t ok then kids can’t be ok.’

Tanya Eichler, Interwoven Connections Clinical Lead in the AFFCA Family Support Programme.

Better Me Better Us Ep 24 - Risk

Tue, 06 May 2025 06:08:00 +0100

This month we’re diving into the topic of risk. Are we too risk averse? And what does that really mean in the world of parenting, adoption and fostering, education, and social work. Join us as we explore how fear of risk and the consequences shapes decision-making, and what impact it has on the young people we’re trying to support. This conversation invites you to consider where caution helps and where it might be holding us back.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Podcast Conference Report - Adoption England (Moving Forwards) 2025

Sat, 03 May 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Al was invited to attend the 2025 Adoption England Conference (Moving Forwards) in London. So, he off he went with his C30 tapes and trusty recorder and was able to grab a few interviews with attendees and contributors. The conversations cover a range of subjects; Early Permanence, the ASGSF, opportunities, adoptee voices, pre order disruption with kind contributions from the following:

Vicky Davidson Boyd - Adoption Tees Valley

Emily Frith Adoption UK

Nathanial-Elliot Coad Youth Network

Sarah Johal Adoption England

Prof Beth Neil University of East Anglia.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here

Spotify here

Google here

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

Churchill Fellowship Report Part 2: Walking with Families - Interventions and Recommendations

Wed, 30 Apr 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this second episode of Al's Churchill Fellowship. You can read the full report here.

Developing the themes in Part 1 this podcast considers how parents and carers are supported by focused organisations. Rather than look at specific models of intervention, of which there are many, it considered how families interacted and accessed the interventions and specifically how they were delivered to the families. Again, drawing heavily from Interwoven Connections based in Ontario, Canada the interplay of parent/carer, peer supporter and clinical staff is highlighted.

‘It’s never about whether a parent is doing a great job. They’re doing the very best they can with what they’ve got.’

Lillyth Quillin, Parents of Children with Conduct Disorter, California, USA

Episode 209 - APPG Adoptee Voice Inquiry

Sat, 26 Apr 2025 06:05:00 +0100

In this episode we have the now almost obligatory ASSGSF intro and the get to the business on hand. We invited the All Party Parliamentary Group on Adoption and Permanence steering committee chair Siobhan Rhodes to come on and talk about the work they're doing to gather the voices of people who are adopted. We chat about what that is with the APPG is and you can complete the survey for Adoptee Voices here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Podcast Special - The Adoption & Special Guardianship March!

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 06:05:00 +0100

We pulled this episode together at short notice to promote the work of adoptive parent Clare Solomon joined by Euan Preston of the Potato group to talk about the upcoming march to protest against the changes to the ASGSF.

We chat through the changes and what they are looking to achieve through the petition and the march. You can sign the petition here, or find out more about the march on the 3rd May to Downing Street here and find out more about them on their Facebook page here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Churchill Fellowship Report Part 1: Walking with Families - Introduction and Peer Support

Wed, 23 Apr 2025 12:01:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this first episode of Al's Churchill Fellowship. You can read the full report here.

This episode draws on peer support specialists working directly with parents and carers living with children with challenging and aggressive behaviour. Focusing on Canada & the USA it considers different models of peer support including social media, virtual and in person. It then considers the role of peer mentors specifically in the Canadian organisation Interwoven Connections based across the province of Ontario that serves a large community through virtual means.

‘The best way to help families is one at a time. What each individual family needs is so unique the only way to truly help families is by addressing each unique needs and concerns one at a time.’

Lillyth Quillin, Parents of Children with Conduct Disorder, California, USA

Episode 208 - Dr Lynn Snow CF Post Adoption Depression

Sat, 19 Apr 2025 06:04:00 +0100

In this Episode Al interviews Dr Lynn Snow. She is a medical doctor who has undertaken a Churchill Fellowship looking at how other countries and context address and support adoptive parents experiencing post adoption depression.

It was a fascinating conversation and Lynn has also worked as a paediatrician on adoption panel and we start by unpacking that a little. We then delve deeply into the issue of PAD, its prevalence, what helps and what doesn't. Lynn's conversations with several professionals are fascinating and you can read her report here.

Before we get into the interview we recorded an exteneded intro unpicking what was then breaking news that the Adoption and Special Guardianship Support Fund was going to be renewed for another year. However, it was before the updates on the Fair Access Limit. So, we will be unpacking that soon.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Rabbi Dr. Shmuly Yanklowitz

Sat, 12 Apr 2025 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of Converations from the A&F podcast. In this episode I speak to foster carer and Rabbi Dr. Shmuly Yanklowitz. He’s passionate about protecting vulnerable children which is what led him to start YATOM: The Jewish Foster and Adoption Network. He is a father to 4 children and has fostered 8 children over the past few years with his wife, Shoshana.

They work to motivate and support the Jewish community in the journey of adopting & fostering children and to advocate for the needs of orphans, children needing temporary homes, and adoptive families.

It is a fantastic discussion and we're sure you’ll find it interesting.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Better Me Better Us Ep 23 - Keeping Up With the Kids

Tue, 08 Apr 2025 06:06:00 +0100

What does it really mean to keep up with the kids? It's more than knowing the latest slang or TikTok trends – it's about staying curious, open, and connected.

In this episode, we explore how tuning into the world our young people live in helps build stronger relationships and deeper understanding. Are you up to date with the language they use? Do you know what matters to them right now? Are you curious rather than critical?

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Episode 207 - Michelle Hall & Dr Paul Shuttleworth talk Life Story Work and Kinship

Sat, 05 Apr 2025 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the A&F podcast. In this, slightly raucous, episode we speak to Michelle Hall and Dr Paul Shuttleworth. They chat about the work they are doing with the charity Kinship supporting carers to help children make sense of their life stories.

They are delivering free training across the UK, both online and in person, and you can sign up through the Kinship website here.

If you're interested in coming to Al's Fellowship report release/webinar then you can sign up for free here.

23rd April 12 noon to 13:30 Practitioners here

24th April 20:00 to 21:00 Parent/Carer here

If you want to get the audio from the event but can't attend at the time then you can also sign up and it will be sent out after the events.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Foster Carer Zoe Bell

Sat, 29 Mar 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to this episode of Converations from the A&F podcast. In this episode I speak to foster carer Zoe Bell, she shares her experience of being a foster carer and the impact of her faith on that. She now works for the charity 100 Homes based in Nottinghamshire that supports local churches to recruit carers and build networks around foster carers for the local authority.

Links:

Facebook and Insta: @100HomesNotts

Email: info@100homes.org.uk

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Adoptive Parent Ali Fanshaw

Sat, 15 Mar 2025 07:05:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast. In this episode I speak to adoptive parent Ali. With her husband they adopted two boys and after what seemed like a routine and normal experience of parenting challenges came when they started School. Ali shares her experience of facing challenges, difficult decisions that led to her setting up the ‘Fizzy Kids’ website and FaceBook page.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 22 – Interpretations

Tue, 11 Mar 2025 06:17:00 +0000

This month, we're exploring the power of interpretations. The way we hear, use, and understand words can significantly shape how we think,feel, and respond. We reflect on how shifting our interpretations can improve relationships and promote understanding.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Episode 205 -The Impact of Childhood Maltreatment Research with Laura Smith

Sat, 08 Mar 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Phd Student Laura Smith recently got in touch with us in relation to research that she is undertaking research assessing the impact of a history of childhood maltreatment in the birth family on a child's emotional development. This is aimed specifically at adopters and adoptees aged 3 to 10 years old and she is keen to speak to families. We unpick why she is undertaking this research and what it can tell us in terms of how we care for adopted, and other children, who have experienced early adversity.

If you'd like to be involved here is the link to the study for parents to take part: https://southampton.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_ekEPeAvyn4TjBmC

We also unpack the ongoing ASGSF saga and Scott shares news of the upcoming, and rather exciting, FASD Ireland conference in May. You can find details of that here.

At no point do we mention Al's Churchill Fellowship and that you can find out more here!

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Peter Jacob talks about NVR

Sat, 01 Mar 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to this slightly unusual episode of Converations from the A&F podcast.

Today I’m speaking to Peter Jakob, he introduced NVR (Non Violent Resistance) to the UK and has been a leader in its development and training of practitioner here. He’s has a new book out ‘Non Violent Resistance in Trauma Focused Practice’, we talk about that as well as broader issues supporting families.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 204 - Adopter & Swer Rebecca Govern talks FASD and Post Adoption Support

Sat, 22 Feb 2025 06:12:00 +0000

This was a fantastic episode to record, Rebecca draws on her experience as an adoptive parent to a child impacted by FASD as well as being a practicing social worker as we talk about FASD and the challenges families face getting help. To be honest it's such a critical topic we cartwheel around it.

Rebecca wrote the following:

"I am a doctoral researcher at Birmingham City University. My research looks at post adoption social work with families with a child with a suspected or confirmed diagnosis of FASD (Fetal alcohol spectrum disorder) from the perspectives of social workers, parent carers and children.

I am seeking participants who are social workers in the field of post adoption social work and have experience of working with children with a confirmed of suspected diagnosis of FASD to complete the this questionnaire here."

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Podcast Special - AUK's Becky Brooks on the Children's Wellbeing and Schools Bill

Sat, 15 Feb 2025 06:05:00 +0000

In this episode we get Becky Brooks to come on and walk us through the new Government's Children’s Wellbeing and Schools Bill that is progressing through parliament now. There's lot to unpack and Becky is able to direct us to the highlights with school uniforms, admission rules for looked after children, virtual school powers, guardianship offers and much more discussed.

As always Beck it spot on and you can read more on her analysis here.

If you’ve experience of adoption, fostering or special guardianship from any perspective personal or professional and would like share that on the podcast please get in touch through the Facebook page, BlueSky or email us at AandFpodcast@gmail.com

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

BMBU Episode 21 - Kindness

Tue, 11 Feb 2025 06:06:00 +0000

This month we’re talking about kindness- the chosen as Children's word of the year for 2024.We'll talk about why it matters, how it shapes connections and interactions.

Kindness isn’t just about individual moments—it creates a ripple effect. When children experience kindness, it strengthens relationships, builds trust, and influences the systems and communities around them. A kind, understanding approach within families, schools, and support networks can transform outcomes for children who have experienced trauma.

As always you can connect with us through the following -

Instagram- BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Episode 203.5 Becky Brooks and the Adoption Barometer

Sat, 08 Feb 2025 06:05:00 +0000

Hello and Welcome to this Episode, It's always a pleasure to have Adoption UK's Becky Brooks onto the podcast. Becky is an adoptive parent, former foster care, author and self confessed policy and statistics Nerd.

Adoption UK's Adoption Barometer is open til the 17th Feb and is a tool that informs policy makers and gives real data to the lived experience of adoptees and adopters' families. We unpick some of the reasoning behind the questions and why only 16 to 25 year old adoptees are polled.

We get of course chat about much more, hoovers, jeans and law and as always Becky's experience, knowledge and humour make it a Bantertastic episode.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Solo Adoptive Parent Ramsey

Sat, 01 Feb 2025 06:42:51 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F podcast. In this episode I speak to solo adopter Ramsey. He shares his journey to adoption and the experience of travelling through it on his own.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here or Spotify here

Episode 203 - Artificial Intelligence and Support + A Patch Update

Sat, 25 Jan 2025 06:06:00 +0000

Hello and Welcome to this Episode, we jump on the AI bandwagon and dig into what we think about the idea of support to families being provided by A.I. It is an interesting chat and we give on A.I. model a try with surprising results. We also unpack the comments we got through our FB page.

Fiona Wells joins us for the whole conversation, share's her perspective and then gives us an update about the work of PATCH targeting change within adoption.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Conversations - Adoptive Parent Augusto

Sat, 18 Jan 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network. In this episode I speak to Augusto, with his wife they adopted twins. He reflects on the challenges of early permanence and transracial adoption.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here

Spotify here

Google here

Better Me Better Us Episode 20 - Goals

Tue, 14 Jan 2025 06:42:00 +0000

This month, we focus on goals. Do you set goals? If so, are they truly for you, or are they shaped by what society expects?

For fostered and adopted children, the ultimate goal often revolves around finding a permanent family. But how much are they included in shaping this goal? Are their voices heard in the process?

Join us in the conversation as we explore the importance of realistic, meaningful and inclusive goal-setting.

Connect with us -

Instagram- @BMBUltd

Facebook – Better Me Better Us

Twitter – @BMBUltd

Email – info@bettermebetterus.co.uk

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here

Spotify here

Episode 202 - Tris & Paula

Sat, 11 Jan 2025 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to this episode A&F podcast our traditional new year check in with spouses Tris and Paula.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 201 - Sarah Anderson from Foster Wiki talks allegations.

Sat, 04 Jan 2025 06:04:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to the first episode of 2025! We recorded this episode with Sarah in the run up to Christmas so we're all festive and looking ahead and behind in our references.

We invited Sarah on to share the findings of FosterWiki's 2024 Independent Allegations Report. We have a really interesting chat about its contents as well as sharing personal and professional experience and reflect on the impact on children, adults and the broader system.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here Spotify here

Episode 180 -Therapeutic Parenting. What is it?

Sat, 28 Dec 2024 06:31:00 +0000

Merry Christmas! As we take a break over the holiday we re release what was the most listened to podcast of 2024.

thank you all for listening!

Hello and welcome to the Adoption and Fostering podcasting, this week we explore Therapeutic Parenting and Good Enough Parenting. Terms that we often throw around and presume that we understand but we ask what it actually is, is there a definition and are we all on the same page.

We draw on the feedback we had from the excellent comments on our FB pages (you can read them here and here and consider if we are indeed therapeutic parents.

We also unpick a little news and catch up with all that's going on.

Finally if you've not completed the Home Office consultation on definition of Child to Parent Abuse please do so here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here

Spotify here

Google here

Episode 200 - Christmas Special and 200th Episode Celebration

Sat, 21 Dec 2024 06:04:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to episode 200 from the A&F Network and our 2024 Christmas special.

We've shipped in the wonderful Mark Owers to guest host a proper retrospective podcast unpicking a whole raft of episodes, anecdotes and think about why we started the podcast and looked at the highlights. Mark weaves in Christmas questions and we think about what the future holds.

We have also released it in full video format on our YouTube channel here.

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here or Spotify here

Safeguarding in Adoption Conference - Al Coates

Sat, 14 Dec 2024 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to a slightly unusual series of episodes of the A&F podcast. In September I joined Fiona wells from PATCH, Friend of the show Vicki McKeown and strategic lead for Adoption England Sarah Johal to speak at the Safeguarding in Adoption online conference. With over 500 tickets requested we were overwhelmed with the interest in this subject that impacts so many families.

In this episode we hear Sarah Johal.

Fiona an adoptee, adopter & social worker explained the reason for the conference:

"Practice towards adopters in crisis can be oppressive, biased and lacking in fundamental foundational understanding. There needs to be a firm consideration of the impact of adversity on the whole of the child, their whole world, and their family and support offered in line with their needs, handed over with understanding, compassion and empathy. PATCH campaigns for social workers to step back, trauma experts to step forward, and for a different lens to be used."

Listen/subscribe on iTunes here

Spotify here

Google here

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

Better Me Better You Ep 19 – Trauma and Christmas

Tue, 10 Dec 2024 06:07:00 +0000

Christmas can be a time of joy, but for many adopted and fostered children, it can feel deeply unsettling. The festive season often brings up complex emotions, triggers, and reminders of loss. In this episode, we explore how trauma impacts children during Christmas, why traditional celebrations can feel overwhelming, and how thinking ahead and making adjustments can make the time more manageable.

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Safeguarding in Adoption Conference - Sarah Johal

Sat, 07 Dec 2024 06:06:00 +0000

In this episode we hear Sarah Johal.

Fiona an adoptee, adopter & social worker explained the reason for the conference:

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Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

Conversations - Foster Carers Mobeena and Wajid

Sat, 30 Nov 2024 11:21:03 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode I speak to Mobeena and Wajid foster carers for Hillingdon Council. They describe a positive experience of choosing to be foster carers as their own children grew older and of welcoming a child into their home on a long term basis.

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Episode 199 - Eight Year Anniversary Get Together .

Sat, 23 Nov 2024 06:06:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to episode 199 from the A&F Network.

Well, it's been eight years since we started and that coincided with us being together in Ireland. So, we kick back in Scott's kitchen, catch up on events and reflect on stuff.

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Conversations - Dr Elaine Machett

Sat, 16 Nov 2024 06:10:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode I speak to Dr Elaine Machett a solo adoptive parent. Drawing on her own personal experience she shares the results of her interviews with adoptive parents in relation to the challenges they faced when their children first moved in. As well as being a huge transition and stress for children for many parents it is a difficult time where they can feel overwhelmed and struggle to adjust. Elaine shares the themes and issue the parent raised and we discussed our own experiences.

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BMBU Episode 18- Consequences

Tue, 12 Nov 2024 06:01:00 +0000

In this latest episode Vicki and Haley discuss what we mean by “consequences”. Although consequences and punishments may seem similar, understanding the difference can have a huge impact on how we view and respond to behaviour. We talk about the need for both, what they might look like in families and in the workplace as well as how people’s experiences of them influence their view and use of them.

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Episode 198 - CEO of Walk the Walk Jacqueline Gear

Sat, 09 Nov 2024 06:54:53 +0000

Hello and welcome to episode 198 from the A&F Network. This week we speak to Jacqueline Gear the CEO of Walk the Walk Family Support Service based in Herefordshire. We discuss the work that they do with families including a family contact centre supporting positive relationships between parents. As always it's an interesting conversation and you can look at their website and see what they get up to.

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Conversations - Adult Adoptee Barbara

Sat, 02 Nov 2024 06:07:00 +0000

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode I speak to Barbara, she was adopted as a baby in the late 1940’s after the 2nd world war . She describes the experience of finding out she was adopted by accident as a 12 year old, the challenges that brought and then later in life searching for her biological family. Barbara has written an account of her experiences and journey in a book ‘Blue Plastic Cow’ and you can find a link to that here.

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Episode 197 - Sam Turner from Kinship

Sat, 26 Oct 2024 06:09:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to Episode 197 of the A&F podcast. In this episode we chat to Sam Turner Head of Policy and Public Affairs at Kinship. We'd hoped to catch Kinship Care week earlier in the month but circumstances got the better of us.

Sam joined us to chat about some of the work that Kinship had been doing as well as to highlight the new report Forgotten: Support for kinship children’s education and mental health It's a lively and friendly chat but we cover what are significant issues for many families caring for their children.

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Conversations - Adoptive Parents Jo and James

Sat, 19 Oct 2024 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode we speak to Jo and James, they are biological parents and adoptive parents and came to that through the process of foster to adopt.

They share their story and shine a light on the challenges that can emerge through the process of early permanence and the emotional turmoil and complexity that it can often bring. Ultimately they did successfully navigate the process and they are open and honest about this experience.

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Webcast with Adopter and Adoption Researched Claire Agius

Thu, 17 Oct 2024 06:15:01 +0100

Hello and Welcome to this midweek webcast. Al spoke to Claire Agious an adoptive parent and Phd researcher considering the support that families are receiving through post adoption support from the perspective of adoptive parents and post adoption social workers.

Claire shares her journey to her research and more about what she is doing.

On the 23rd October Claire is hosting a free adoption conference,

Adoptive Parenting: myths, challenges and contemporary perspectives

at the Manchester Metropolitan University and you can get more details and book here.

https://forms.office.com/pages/responsepage.aspx?id=UPs_KAujjEiQ9M2uT3rm0ZmvjM75w_ZDgOrz2HLd7FRUMFZTRlUwT0xXVlZENDVFREZCSjhDUklUNC4u&route=shorturl

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Safeguarding in Adoption - Fiona Wells

Tue, 15 Oct 2024 06:11:00 +0100

Fiona an adoptee, adopter & social worker explained the reason for the conference:

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Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

Safeguarding in Adoption - Vicki McKeown

Sat, 12 Oct 2024 06:04:00 +0100

Fiona an adoptee, adopter & social worker explained the reason for the conference:

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Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

Episode 17 – What is success?

Tue, 08 Oct 2024 07:18:25 +0100

In this episode, we’ll explore the big question: What do we mean by success? How are we really measuring it? Is success defined by traditional milestones like career achievements or financial stability, or can it be something more personal and nuanced?

We’ll explore how success can look different for everyone, especially when considering individual experiences such as neurodivergence, fostering and adoption.

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Episode 196 - Scott and Al, #CPV on the telly and Adoption Improvements

Sat, 05 Oct 2024 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of the podcast. We catch up with some news and reflect on the recent BBC programme 'I am not ok' looking at parents caring for children with violent and agressive behaviour. You can view it here in the UK. We also talk about the recent article in CYPNow by Mark Owers considering the changes that need to be brought in for Adoption. You can view that here.

In the chat we talk about a domestic homicide review and you can read that here. Of course we advise caution and note the this is highly unusual crime and not to stress over it. Get in touch via the email below if you're worried.

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Conversations - Adult Adoptee Brendan Watkins

Sat, 28 Sep 2024 06:13:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode I speak to adult adoptee Brendan. His experience of being adopted and the challenges of searching for his parents is compounded by the fact that his biological father was a priest. This fact added a layer of complexity and secrecy to what was already a challenging search. Brendan is open about the challenges that he faced across many years as the truth unfolded.

Brendan has written account of his experiences and you can read or listen to the book here and visit his website here to find out more about his experience and other aspects of his work and the other children of priests/

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Better Me Better Us - Ep 14 Be Curious?

Sat, 21 Sep 2024 11:15:03 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of the Better Me Better Us Podcast with Vicki and Hayley.

In this months episode they talk about the importance of being curious with those around us. Curiosity helps us develop deeper understanding, build stronger connections, and respond to the needs of those around us with empathy and insight.

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Episode 195 - Creative Life Story Work with Jenny Young

Sat, 21 Sep 2024 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode, it's a fascinating chat with our guest Jenny Young the founder and Director of We are Blue Cabin they work to 'develop and strengthen relationships between care experienced individuals and the people in their lives through creative activities.'.

Click here to look at their website

It's a really interesting conversation as we consider what we mean by 'life story work' and reflect on what that can look like and/or should look like. Jenny is passionate about supporting children, families and practitioners in the work that she does.

Of course there's plenty of #Infobanter thrown in.

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Conversations - Megan Tanner

Sat, 14 Sep 2024 06:05:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to conversations from the A&F Network.

In this episode we catch up with foster carer Megan, we spoke to her in the autumn of 2022 as she was about to set out on a new adventure in Africa. Megan catches us up with the work she’s been doing and the book that she’s been writing. She shares her own lived experience as a neuro-divergent foster carer and explains how barriers can be broken down to establish a successful partnership with one sole aim: to create the best possible outcome for a child or teen in need.

Megan Tanner: Founder of Hear Their Roar and NVR Parenting Consultant Linktr.ee: https://linktr.ee/heartheirroar Amazon book link: https://amzn.eu/d/561LeE9

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Better Me Better Us - Ep 16 Safety

Tue, 10 Sep 2024 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of the Better Me Better Us Podcast with Vicki and Hayley.

In this episode, they dive into the concept of safety—both physical and emotional—and explore what it truly means to feel safe. They discuss how trauma can deeply affect our sense of security, impacting the way we navigate relationships, environments, and ourselves.

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Episode 194 - Summer news with Scott, Al & Fiona Wells

Sat, 07 Sep 2024 06:06:00 +0100

It's been a busy old summer. In this episode we catch up with family changes, business changes and generally updates from the two. It's been a busy summer for everyone but now we're at the new term we're thinking ahead. Scott shares some updates with FASD Ireland and Al in relation to the Churchill Fellowship.

We asked Fiona Wells to come and share how the plans for the 'Safeguarding in Adoption' online conference planned for the 24th September are coming along. It's free and you can book a place here.

We discuss some of the challenges of living with trauma and reflect on all our families' experiences.

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Episode 173 - Historic Adoption Policy with Dr Michael Lambert

Sat, 31 Aug 2024 06:07:00 +0100

Scott and Al are having a week off! both taking a pause after a busy year and before a busy autumn. So, rather than do nothing we're re releasing a cracking episode from last year that is well worth a revisit.

In this episode we speak to NHS historian Dr Michael Lambert. He has looked at the historic evidence of Government policy to promote and facilitate removal of children from mothers in the post war period. We discuss this as well as the move towards a formal apology from the government as well as from other players in the system at that time. The conversation is revelatory and puts into perspective and questions the idea that adoption was solely driven by society.

Certainly, as a topic it places contemporary adoption in context as well as considering how modern practice still echoes the historical roots of adoption.

The links below will take you to written work, evidence Michael's letter to the movement for an adoption apology:

The birth mother and the evolution of adoption policy and practice in England since 1926 by Dr Jatinder Sandhu

Letter to the Movement for an adoption apology

The right to family life: adoption of children of unmarried women 1949-1976

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Conversations - Bethan Pell, Child to Parent Violence

Sat, 24 Aug 2024 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of the Adoption and Fostering Podcast.

This episode is halfway between a conversation and a normal episode. I had the opportunity to speak to Bethan Pell Doctoral Researcher at Cardiff University. She’s looking Child and Adolescent to Parent Violence and Abuse (CAPVA) in the context of Wales. It’s a fascinating study and Bethan explains the purpose of the research and how she hopes it will develop understanding in Wales of the issue and beyond as well as consider whose voices aren’t being heard.

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Episode 193 - The For Baby's Sake Trust with CEO Lauren Seager-Smith

Sat, 17 Aug 2024 06:07:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to the A&F Podcast.

In this episode we speak to Lauren Seager-Smith CEO of The For Baby's Sake Trust charity working UK-wide to break the cycle of domestic abuse and empower parents to give their babies the best start in life.

For many children in the care system or previously in the care system domestic abuse has been a part of their story and it was a really interesting conversation with Lauren. Additionally, Lauren discusses her previous work around bullying and Scott and Al have had to call in HR.

Here are the links discussed in the news section:

Safeguarding in Adoption on the 24th Sept 9:30 to 1pm online - Here

Adoption England - Maintaining Relationships Standards Consultation - Here

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Better Me Better Us Ep15 - Vulnerability.

Tue, 13 Aug 2024 06:06:00 +0100

Hello and welcome to this episode of the Better Me Better Us Podcast with Vicki and Hayley.

In this months episode we talk about vulnerability. What does it mean to you? Is it a weakness or a sign of strength?

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